Well, we're back for another classy installment of Love & Hip Hop which begins with Amina Buddafly bragging to Rich Dollaz about her marriage to Peter Gunz. She is a horrible actress as she tries to act like she's sick of being considered his side-chick. Peter can't believe she's spilling their secret. After all, he told her that no one could ever know about their little wedding. Mona, I'm insulted. This is what passes for "reality" these days? This is about as real as my relationship with Ryan Gosling.
K. Michelle and her friend Paris are meeting Yandy Smith for gossip and cocktails. They discuss the dating scene in New York City, and K. Michelle reveals that she won't date another man with a hairless cat. Before I can get totally grossed out by K's weird sexual references, she explains that she once dated a guy who actually had a Grandma Whiskers. Yandy decides to plan a ladies' night out to welcome her friend to the Big Apple.
We're introduced to Nya who is a stripper turned rapper (sound familiar?), so of course Rich feels inclined to stop by the studio to check out her sound. Nya isn't keen on having a manager who is known for sleeping with his artists. She's already got enough to overcome with the whole stripper gig. Rich is insulted. Google him. He makes dreams come true. This is either the worst first meeting between "business people" or a prelude to a sexually charged manager-artist relationship. I've learned only one thing from this flipping franchise, and that is the studio time costs money. This entire exchange just seems like a big ol' waste of cash to me.
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Peter is having dinner with his baby mama Tara Wallace, who is not to be confused with his secret bride. She's willing to put his Amina Instagram photo in the past because she knows that Peter doesn't need a jealous girlfriend. He accuses her of snooping through social media, and she is apologetic. Tara reminds him that it takes her back to the time when, oh, you know, she found out he had a secret family on the side. No biggie. Don't these two live together? Why is this date the first interaction they've had since she found the dreaded picture? What a fabulous example they are setting for their kids.
In case you were wondering, Saigon is the coolest guy in the world. He and his biffle Erica Jean decided one night that it would be cool to have a kid. Wham, bam, thank you ma'am, and he's got a baby on the way with his pal…and one on the way with his girlfriend. He's got two kids a month apart. Erica Jean desperately wants a family with Saigon, but her father wants the rapper no where near his daughter. Apparently, Erica's father is the only sane and intelligent person on this show. Seriously, where do they find these people?
Peter isn't happy with Amina for snitching about their situation to Rich, but she understands that he's just a typical guy. Lord, I hope not! He tells her that she used to be his escape from his family chaos and now she's adding to it. Wow, he's a winner, isn't he? There isn't much else to say, so the couple breaks into song. No really.
Nya heads to meet with her new pal Erica Mena, and she fills her in on her altercation with Rich. Erica admits that Rich did her wrong as her manager, but she's stilling willing to pursue a professional relationship with him. Nya thinks it's a bad idea, but to each their own. They decide to collaborate together on a threesome with the two of them…and money. Geez.
Saigon and Peter are playing basketball and chatting about babies and baby mamas. Saigon is contemplating giving Erica Jean a chance as his girlfriend, but Peter reminds him that she trapped him with her pregnancy. He urges Saigon to get a DNA test for his son because you can never be too careful. You know, now that Saigon thinks about it, when he's with his daughter, people are always approaching him about how much the pair look like father and daughter. However, when he's with his son, people just ask if the child is his nephew. Yup, I'm sure that's exactly how it happens! And is it just me, or is Peter more of a pot stirrer than any of these women?
Joe Budden knows that way to Tahiry Jose's big-bootied heart is with a pair of custom made jeans. He's taking their therapist's advice and making a deposit in their relationship account. Tahiry reveals that she has an audition for a movie role, and if she get it, she'll be gone for several weeks. Professor Budden thinks that her going away for work is a form of her abandoning him. He wants to be supportive, but not really…
Rich and Yandy are meeting to discuss their label and potential artists. When Yandy brings up Amina, Rich confides in his friend that Amina is messing with Rich. Yandy wishes she didn't know this information given the fact that she's friends with Tara. Rich gets ticked with Yandy shares her concern over inviting both Amina and Tara to K. Michelle's party. He's used to being a creep.
Saigon is frustrated that Erica Jean's father won't allow him in her house. He does charity work, for goodness' sake. Erica Jean punished Saigon for going on tour during her pregnancy by not allowing him to be present for his son's birth. As they argue about their past, Erica puts on the fake water works…until Saigon brings up a DNA test. Erica storms out of the car, but I certainly hope these crazy kids can make it work. Or not.
In the studio, Peter is working with his son Korey. While he'd hoped Korey would become a doctor or a lawyer, he's proud of his son's rap talent. However, he's not happy that Korey is facing three years on a gun possession charge. Peter feels responsible as he used to hide guns in Korey's stroller. Plus, his given that his last name is "Gunz" it's practically a given he'd have a weapons charge. I want to remind Peter that Gunz isn't his real last name…he could have chosen Peter Spatula has his stage name and maybe Korey would be competing on Top Chef.
After getting a call from Rich alerting him that Yandy has invited Tara and Amina to the same party, Peter bolts from the studio. While he'd love to continue the tender moment with his son, he's got baby mamas and secret wives he needs to keep separated. Priorities! K. Michelle is excited to meet some new friends, and Tara is thankful for a night out with the girls…which apparently amounts to K. Michelle getting into fake fights with potential suitors over who has more cash on hand.
As more women arrive to the gathering, a super stressed Peter is racing to the club in an effort to head off Amina. Thankfully he arrives right on time, but Amina is hurt that he is trying to hold her back from making new friends…and telling Tara about their marriage. Peter promises that he'll come clean to Tara tomorrow. A tearful Amina is determined to tell Tara, but she gives him one more chance. Give me a break.
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[Photo Credit: VH1]