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On last night’s Little Women: LA, tension reaches the breaking point between Jasmine Sorge and Tonya Banks. But before they get into it, Tonya is taking Elena Gant out for a spin in her new dream car, purchased with three seasons of bitterness on reality TV! Tonya’s had her car modified for a little person, so she takes advantage of her new ride by driving Elena up to a mountain peak to talk some trash. Elena fills Tonya in on the epic argument that broke out at Jasmine’s party the night before about Briana Manson’s questionable relationship with boyfriend Matt. Elena thinks Briana needs advice and support, but “sneaky a$$ Jasmine” (according to Tonya) is Briana’s only ally at this point. 

Brittney “Freakabritt” Guzman is moving into her new house with the help of her friend, Shelby, who is also a little person. They valiantly heave and heft boxes as much as they can before sitting down for a chat break. Brittney knows her gigolo dad will miss her, but it’s time to get her own place. She fills Shelby in on the new circle of girls she’s been hanging with, which includes a few former lovahs of her daddy’s. (That was sort of gross to type.) Christy McGinty, Briana, and – according to Brittney – even married Elena were tangled up with her Latin playa’ father at some point. To stir up some sh*t, Brittney’s dad recently suggested throwing a barbecue to get all of these ladies together. So they can claw each others’ eyes out?

 

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Briana is meeting Jasmine out for lunch to debrief about the #AttackBriana moment from her party. Jasmine reassures Briana that her “heart is so strong” for Matt, and Briana agrees that she’ll choose Matt over her friends from now on. She hasn’t seen Matt in person since they broke up last season, though she has had time to get super-cheesey “Bonnie & Clyde” tattoos with him from afar. She asks Jasmine to come with her to see Matt in Seattle for, er, support. Or perhaps a witness? She wants Jasmine to defend her against the girls, so Jasmine agrees to play the part. 

Oy vey. Back to the baby drama with Todd and Christy! Since they’ve been doing IVF treatments, their romantic life has been strained. Making a baby has become more work than fun, and Christy cries that she feels she’s losing Todd through this process. She admits she’s scared that if she doesn’t “provide a child” for him (yes, she actually says that), he’ll never see her the same way again, but he’s already slipping away. “If this doesn’t work, it’s gonna destroy us,” says Todd, with bizarrely dead eyes. Dude, I hope they’re reading from a script because this level of drama seems over the top – even for Christy. 

Jasmine and Briana land in Seattle to an awaiting Matt, armed with red roses. In the car ride home, Matt defends his love for Briana as the real thing, not a fetish. Matt asks whether Jasmine and Briana have fetishes for average sized guys, which, okay, is kind of a good point. More on this later. 

With new dreams of launching a makeup line, Elena is meeting with a makeup collaborator to discuss her ideas. She felt uncomfortable with herself growing up for being different, so she turned to makeup and fashion to boost her self esteem. Good story, but the company wants more from Elena: a formal presentation including visuals, packaging ideas, and a mission statement. Elena wants to be “the next Cover Girl,” but girlfriend’s got a lot of real work ahead of her before those dreams become a reality. And before poor, soon-to-be-knighted Preston takes out a fifth mortgage on his house.

Back in Seattle, Matt whips up some burgers for Jasmine and Briana, and thanks Jasmine for supporting Briana in their relationship. He mentions his ex-wife and child, who he wants the ladies to hang out with the next day. Jasmine thinks hanging out with exes is strange, and admits that the things she’s heard about Matt are scary. Matt gets upset hearing about Terra Jole’s continued trash talk of him. But – oh snap! – he then spills the tea that Christy has no room to discuss other people’s relationships because she’s married to a guy who’s “still in love” with Briana! Todd apparently obsessively talked about how “he could have had” Briana last season during one particularly inebriated night with Matt. Briana just nods along, then says flat out – again – that she’ll choose Matt over her friends if they keep needling her. #Don’tTestBonnie!

The next day in Seattle, the threesome meets up with Matt, his ex-wife Nekia, and son, Eric. If this isn’t a ploy to showcase Matt as the “Totally Normal, NOT Abusive Father and Former Husband!” then I don’t know what is. Nekia congratulates Briana on her engagement to Matt, which seems authentic enough. Briana celebrates the diversity and “modern family” vibe of her new arrangement, and Jasmine is buying the entire scenario hook, lipliner, and sinker.

In LA, Brittney invites Christy to lunch to tell her about her dad’s barbecue. They take a walk down memory lane, and Christy admits to dating her dad, but doesn’t want to share the deets with Brittney. “I had fun and we’ll just leave it there,” says Christy, noting that Todd knows everything about her former friends-with-benefits relationship with Papa Freakabritt.

Briana and Jasmine’s short trip to Seattle is coming to an end, so Matt takes the opportunity to tell Briana that he’s ready to move down to LA in TWO WEEKS (!?) to be with her for good. Apparently, he’s already told his child about this, yes? He says so. Jasmine leaves Seattle with a good impression of Matt, but admits that once he moves to LA, they’ll all see who he really is.

Over at Brittney’s dad, David’s house, he’s got the barbecue heated up, ready for some grillin’. Speaking of heated, Tonya enters the party ready to turn the ratchet meter up to 100 simply upon setting eyes on Jasmine, her chosen nemesis this season. Meanwhile, David is staring at Bionic Elena 2.0 like he’s ready to throw her freshly augmented a$$ on to the grill. For her part, Elena wisely sticks by sweet Preston’s side and ignores David like he’s got a Harry Potter Cloak of Invisibility thrown over his head.

Terra apologizes to Briana in private, and Briana tears up accepting her words with a hug. She hopes it’s genuine and not just Terra telling her what she wants to hear. Briana then tells Terra about taking Jasmine to Seattle, then confesses that Matt is moving in with her in two weeks. Terra is concerned, but done fighting with her for now.

Ready to start some drama, Jasmine calls Tonya out in front of the group to ask if she’s “adult enough” to come outside to talk to her. Uh-oh. Once outside, Tonya explains her problem with Jasmine, which can be summarized as follows: Jasmine bumped into her at a party, then Trevore (Tonya’s brokedown ex) messaged Jasmine on social media. The End. Jasmine thinks Tonya just doesn’t like her, so she’s blowing the entire thing out of proportion. “Disrespect is disrespect,” preaches Tonya, who wants and apology if she’s ever expected to move forward.   

Back inside, Terra tries to calm Tonya down, but that ain’t gonna happen. While they openly talk about Jasmine, Jasmine heads outside with Briana to do the same to Tonya. Inside, Elena (of course) jumps in, which just revs Tonya up more. On another front, Brittney is upset with Elena for basically ignoring her all night. Elena interviews that when she first came to the U.S., she befriended David, which by extension led her into a friendship with Brittney. But she also met Preston early on, then married him five months later. Brittney and David were her best friends back then, says Elena, but she had to make the choice to put her marriage first. Brittney accuses Elena of hanging out with her father just to make Preston jealous. And there it is.

At just this moment, both David and Preston sidle up to the table to awkwardly continue this conversation. Elena admits that her first year of marriage was pretty horrible, and she turned to David to confide her problems in. She reiterates that her marriage had to come first, so she pulled away from them. Okay, raise your hand if you think this is weird. On many levels. (I’ll wait!) Briana jumps on board the denial train and publicly claims she never dated David either. So, that means Christy is the last little woman standing who’s owning her sh*t. #WhatDidDavidDo? 

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To get the heat off of herself, Elena asks Tonya what’s up with Jasmine now? Are they friends or foes? “Until I get an apology and not be talked to in a con-SEND-ing way” then no, says Tonya. Ahem. That line was worth the entire episode. “Apology from WHAT though!?” yells Jasmine, who tells Tonya just to get over it before marching out, flicking Tonya on the nose like a misbehaving dog, then bolting. “Don’t touch me!” screams Tonya, running out of the house after her. Annnnnnd, scene. Looks like we’ll have to wait until next week to see the rest of this hot mess!

TELL US: DOES TONYA NEED TO GET OVER HER ISSUE WITH JASMINE? DO YOU THINK ELENA IS TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT HER RELATIONSHIP WITH DAVID? 

Photo Credit: Lifetime

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