Last night’s Below Deck was setting the scene for quite an explosive finale, and I cannot wait. I am just sick about the season ending…one might say I’m seasick over it all. I am also sick-sick and popping antibiotics and fighting off a recurring fever, but it’s clear that there was no denying the heat between everyone’s favorite first stew and a chef whose eyebrows don’t scare the living bejezzus out of me! Let’s “dive in,” shall we? Raquel “Rocky” Dakota Bartlow needs a friend to talk to, so she finds Emile Kotze to tell him about her tryst with Eddie Lucas, and he’s not even sure how to respond? High five? Congratulations? He laughs bitterly and settles on,”I can’t believe he got it in and I didn’t.” She shares the juicy details (where, how many times, what it was like) and brags that she has evidence on her phone in the form of horny text messages from Eddie. She’s glad Emile is such a great pal who is willing to listen. I’m concerned Emile’s head is going to explode, but he remains loyal to his favorite tease. Speaking of teasing, Ben Robinson questions Kate Chastain about the lingerie she’s wearing, and she coyly details her lacy bra, admitting to going commando elsewhere.
The charter guests are two real estate moguls and their four pretty girlfriends (that’s right…four). Ben remarks that the women are gorgeous, and Kate manages an awkward smile. In the galley, Rocky tries to have some semblance of a normal relationship with Eddie, but he’s not having any of it. He’s beyond excited to be over with this charter. He’s never been more thrilled to get off a yacht. Not only is my once favorite bosun being unnecessarily mean, Eddie pulls a giant douche move and accuses Rocky of seducing him with the knowledge he had a girlfriend. No. Just no. Last time I checked, Eddie’s loyalty, not Rocky’s, was owed to his girlfriend. Later, he tries to tease Emile over breakfast, but Emile is livid at his superior for stealing his girl. When Eddie doesn’t get a reaction, he starts barking orders with Emile walking out mid-command. Emile and Connie Arias are snipping at each other as they ready the sun deck. A crabby Emile whines about everything, which Connie labeling him a “little bitch.” He retaliates by calling her a whore. He’s such a catch.
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Rocky opines about her secret romance with Eddie, and Amy Johnson tries to give her a pep talk. However, Rocky bursts into tears, forcing Amy to realize that this time something much bigger than “hating her job” is in play. Rocky reminds Amy that everyone thinks she’s cuckoo for coco puffs. Amy doesn’t disagree, but she hates seeing anyone sad. Awaiting the charter guests, Kate and Ben continue their flirting with some deeper questions. Does Kate want a family? Why, yes. Does Ben? Of course! They only butt heads on how they should be raised. Kate wants a husband and father who is present with a stable job, while Ben needs a woman who is appreciates his drive and passion…plus, he knows of some great boarding schools. The guests arrive, and the crew anxiously awaits to see how the room arrangements will fall into place. Emile continues complaining about being overly tired, but Connie knows he’s actually sexually frustrated. She can see right through his excuses and cites that he’s just pissed that he’s had to have a relationship with his hand this entire charter season after being rebuffed by Rocky.
Over lunch service, it’s not quite clear which girls are with which guys. The male guests are throwing out ridiculously corny lines, and the women aren’t biting. Instead the girls request some quality time on the jet skis with Eddie and Emile. Eddie can’t complain about his job, and Rocky wants to throw herself overboard once again. The men converge upon Ben to ask for bone-in rib-eye and twice baked potatoes for their first meal, and Ben is excited to oblige. He then takes Kate aside to express his concern about Rocky. She seems extra down lately, and perhaps they should do something nice for her. Kate reminds Ben that he has no clue how lazy and rude and disrespectful she’s been before he arrived, but if he’d like to treat her to a yummy breakfast, Rocky loves Eggs Benny. Ben retorts that Kate doesn’t always have to be such a bitch, and that signals the end of the conversation for Kate. Meanwhile, Eddie is videochatting with his girlfriend Amy, and she wonders if Rocky has had any freak outs lately. Amy reveals that Rocky is now following her on Instagram, which both she and Eddie find a bit creepy. Unfortunately, just like she overheard Ben and Kate’s recent exchange, Rocky is right outside of Eddie’s cabin. Amy says she doesn’t find Rocky to be cute, and Eddie quickly agrees. Funny, he didn’t feel that way earlier in the season.
Ben has prepared a feast, and he’s saddened that the previous Eros chef wasn’t into creating imaginative courses. #beefcheek The primary charter guest is spitting out the lamest come-ons and thanking God for his member in a prayer. The women he’s brought are disgusted by his behavior, especially after he invites them to join him in his suite for the night. One girl calls him a douchebag before storming away from the table, with two other girls following her lead. Surprisingly, one chick hangs around to see if his lines get any less offensive. It’s a bit awkward, but if the guests want to go to bed early, it’s quite fine by Amy and Kate! Rocky texts Eddie requesting a chat, but he’s got nothing to say. Clearly crushed, she starts bawling to Emile who tries to comfort her. She thwarts his every hug advance. Emile, take the hint. You are never going to have a chance. The following morning, Amy compliments Connie on a consistent job well done all on every charter, sharing Eddie’s steeping praise about the only deckhand on whom he can truly count. Amy should become a motivational speaker. Connie then goes to meet Captain Lee Rosbach and Eddie on the bridge. Obviously worried that Connie is tattling about his “whore” comment, Emile arrives just in time to apologize. The joke’s on him, as Connie kept her mouth shut. When Emile skulks away, the Captain asks why Emile was so sorry and rolls his eyes at the reason.
The primary charter guest oversleeps after a big night, as Ben complains about breakfast being his least favorite meal to fix. Kate chides that she may hate hearing him talk about breakfast as he hates cooking it. It can’t help that the guests are chanting, “We want food! We want food!” The primary guest makes a quick appearance before excusing himself to go vomit. The remaining guests send back the breakfast with complaints of under cooked eggs and over cooked sausage. Kate has the unfortunate task of telling Ben the news. Excusing himself from the breakfast drama, Emile notices that the motor boat is banging into the yacht thanks to choppy waters. He runs to the rescue to fix the line but ends up falling in the water between the two vessels. Emile recovers like a champ and begrudgingly accepts Eddie’s praise and assistance. During the mini-clip, we’re treated to a slew of Amy-isms comprised of sayings she doesn’t get quite right, but are more hilarious her way.
Amy saves breakfast with bottomless mimosas as the crew preps for the beach party, and the Captain is impressed at how well everyone is getting along. It must be noted that Rocky is still crying in her room. When she appears for laundry duty, Emile continues to pledge his allegiance. Does she want someone to tell off Kate? He’s her man. Punch Eddie? He’s happy to help. Rocky decides she needs to get in the water. As she passes Ben in her mermaid costume, he finally acknowledges she’s a nut job. Rocky dives into the water, swims to shore, and flails loudly in the surf as the guests watch in confusion. When the crew arrives back on the Eros, Rocky is peeved she isn’t getting the level of attention she desired. What could possibly up her game? Hey, let’s start telling co-workers about the hook-ups with Eddie. That may just do the trick! Rocky heads to find Amy for her big reveal. She provides all the dirty details, and Amy is a little jealous and very impressed they were able to keep it under wraps. Amy questions whether Rocky knew Eddie had a girlfriend, and Rocky plays dumb. Emile bursts into the bathroom to announce he’s reached his limit…he has to confront Eddie and defend Rocky’s honor. He refuses to listen as Rocky and Amy try to dissuade him.
TELL US – WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE? WHO WAS WORSE…EDDIE FOR BEING A GIANT D-BAG TO ROCKY OR ROCKY FOR SPILLING THEIR PERSONAL BUSINESS?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]