Little Women: Atlanta Recap: Engaged and Deranged

There’s plenty going on this season of Little Women: Atlanta and we are only five episodes in. Now that the girls are back from Black Bike Week in Myrtle Beach, it is time to get down to business in the ATL. We’ve got babies to keep cooking, restraining orders to be filing, and engagement rings to be given.

The only gal still missing from action is Emily Fernandez, who is still in Dallas with baby JJ. Bestie Bri Barlup has been in touch and JJ seems to be getting stronger each day, but I think Emily will be understandably absent the whole season. Filling in is Bri’s new friend, Melissa, who already started off rocky with the ladies in Myrtle Beach and oh, in case you didn’t hear, she’s a model.


Little Women: Atlanta recap

Last week’s episode ended with some serious baby drama as Amanda and Andrea Salinas rushed to the hospital because of Andrea’s early contractions. It seemed like she was this close to a premature delivery but Andrea’s OB tells her that she needs to stay overnight to take meds to stop the contractions. Andrea is still scared, but dries her tears and prepares to stay overnight.

Before Andrea even has a chance to recover, the nurse comes in with an envelope containing the details of whether her baby girl is a little person or average sized. Sister Amanda snatches the results away and despite Andrea wanting to know now (maybe it would help cheer her up after quite a scare), Amanda insists on keeping it hidden so she can plan a reveal party for the show with their friends. Chris stares off into space in the background, adding nothing and as useless as ever.

Little Women: Atlanta recap

Apparently, Monie Cashette didn’t get enough of turning up in Myrtle Beach so she and Bri are going to May Fest, which is a big concert event that Ms. Juicy is hosting. After Ms. Juicy spends some time on stage being the self-appointed Queen of Atlanta (and don’t you forget it), they head back to Ms. Juicy’s trailer to gossip and plan their next outing. Since Black Bike Week was over turnt, Ms. Juicy wants them to go to a winery so they can “class it up” a little, as if you could take the “turn up” out of these chicks.

But first, Ms. Juicy still has business to deal with in the form of Minnie Ross and her bodyguard mom, Tammie. The restraining order she filed is going to court and she has to face off with them in a few short days.

Before we head to court, it’s time to head to another place where guilty souls go: the jewelry store. Morlin, baby faced boyfriend of Monie, has called none other than Minnie to meet him so she could help him pick out an engagement ring for his lady. Minnie is hoping this will help bring her closer to her estranged bestie but I’m thinking she shouldn’t hold her breath – their friendship is looking as solid as the cubic zirconia ring Morlin just picked out.

Little Women: Atlanta recap

Bri has her own relationship to work on and is meeting up with her now “off” boyfriend and baby daddy, Wooda. Last we saw of him from season one, they were in couples therapy and Wooda was seeing other people. While they watch their kids play, Wooda says he wants them all to move in together and says wants a second chance. Bri takes all of two seconds to agree and wow, that was easy.

Tammie and Minnie are driving to court to see what happens with the restraining order Ms. Juicy filed. While I do think a restraining order might be a tad dramatic (and yes, shady), Tammie and Minnie seem to think they didn’t do anything wrong and don’t want to accept any responsibility for throwing food on someone just because they didn’t like what she had to say. Tammie, as a grown woman, should be more mature than that.

Really, Tammie should have never even gone with Minnie to fight her battle and for that, she kind of deserves to waste a day in court. But the courts could not care less about this little spat and Tammie acts like she channeled the spirit of Johnny Cochran to come out victorious – the restraining order against her is dropped.

Little Women: Atlanta recap

With all that behind them, Ms. Juicy invites Minnie to get a drink now that there are no restraining orders to hold back their friendship. Ms. Juicy is attempting to make amends, Minnie starts tearing up and apologizes “as a woman”. Juicy accepts and says that next time she has a problem, she should leave her mom out of it. Amen to that.

Amanda invites all the girls to party for Andrea now that she’s out of the hospital and the big reveal will come in the form of a cake. Full sized cake = average sized person and cupcake = little sized person. The cake box opens and it’s a little person! Andrea is excited and Chris makes a comment about carrying around both of his little children like backpacks. God, I hate him.

Little Women: Atlanta recap

Off to the vineyard to do some wine tasting and hopefully, no twerking. Some places are sacred, you know. Bri has brought Melissa again, in hopes that she will make a better impression than she did at Black Bike Week.

But instead of laying back and taking the temperature of the room with a bunch of girls who she didn’t get along with the last time they got together, Melissa jumps right in as soon as they sit down and asks the Twins what they are doing for work now that Andrea is pregnant. That would be all fine and good but it quickly turns into Melissa saying that her modeling is more respectable than going out there and twerking. I really don’t care if Melissa has walked a runway, that does not a model make and I demand to see a portfolio of her work.

Little Women: Atlanta recap

Obviously, the Twins are getting annoyed and Melissa takes it one step further and asks their boyfriends what they think of their women twerking. Chris mumbles something that I think means he doesn’t like it then takes a big swig on his white wine. I can’t understand a damn word this kid says. Amanda snaps that it’s none of Melissa’s business and Melissa giggles, knowing exactly what she’s doing with her shadiness. I wish she would catwalk on out of there because I’m bored with her.

As the group heads to the vineyards to pick grapes, Morlin pulls Monie aside to get romantic, despite the fact that she is definitely a little drunk. Morlin drops to one knee and Monie says, “yeah” to his proposal. For real. The gang comes over to congratulate her and Monie, now more than a little drunk off that engagement high, bounces from showing off her ring, to crying, to saying she has to plan a wedding and asking Ms. Juicy to be her maid of honor, in front of everyone. Obviously, Minnie is upset.

Little Women: Atlanta recap

Back at home, the couple is enjoying all the romance that comes with a new engagement. Morlin made breakfast in bed and confesses that Minnie came to pick out the ring with him. Instead of taking it graciously (the boy did just pick you out a ring and ask you to marry him!), Monie goes to Ratchet Level Five and says Minnie can’t be trusted with anything and that includes picking out a ring. Morlin felt sorry for Minnie and mentions Monie asking Ms. Juicy to be her maid of honor in front of everyone. Morlin has yet to learn he’s not allowed to have feelings or opinions and gets orange juice and eggs thrown in his face.

What is it with this crew and wasting perfectly good food?

Photo Credit: Lifetime

Author: Karen

Related: A Real Time Update on Emily and Baby JJ