Summer House Recap: Hamptons, We Have A (Trash) Problem

Summer House is the gift that keeps on giving. Just when I couldn’t handle one more minute of the drama between Hannah Berner and Luke Gulbranson taking over the season, the roommates up and gifted us a truly epic argument about…taking out the garbage. Which quickly tornado’d into a full-blown knock-down, drag-out feud involving thrown glasses, accusations of jealousy and competing sleep schedules. It was truly a joy to behold. But of course, there’s plenty to get through before the episode’s trash-driven climax, so let’s jump in!

It’s the morning after the latest Luke/Hannah clash, and Ciara Miller has officially chosen Hannah’s side in the cold war. Which means she now wants nothing to do with Luke. Particularly after seeing how he’s spoken to Hannah on more than one occasion now. So instead, she decides to wander around the house in a bikini, giving him the cold shoulder. It’s actually kind of amazing to see. Mostly because a guy like Luke clearly isn’t used to getting shut down by someone totally out of his league. Seeing that Hannah is now ruining his chances with Ciara, he immediately jumps into damage control mode.

Meanwhile, Kyle Cooke and Amanda Batula escape the house for a quick trip to the post office. They have hundreds of packages of Loverboy merch to send out to eagerly awaiting fans. (All designed by Amanda, I have to say I’m quite in love with all the Loverboy merch. I don’t even drink and I want to get my hands on one of those sweatshirts!) The car ride also gives the couple a chance to vent about all the drama happening in the house. Meaning Hannah and Luke. Unsurprisingly, they fall on opposing sides — Amanda’s loyalties lie with Hannah while Kyle sees Luke’s perspective. Or maybe he just sees Hannah as the problem?

Summer House

After a long week of working from home, it’s finally the weekend. Which means it’s time to SEND IT! To celebrate, Amanda‘s organized an afternoon of drinking games. The roommates don mullet wigs and split into two teams: Team Dingleberry and Team Toupe. This is the first time king of the mullet Kyle has worn a black one in his life. And somehow, it still works on our dear Cookie. Multiple rounds of the Pantyhose Challenge, the Cookie Challenge, and Ultimate Slip ‘N Flip ensue. One of the teams ekes out a win by a single point. Don’t ask me which. Mostly it gives Luke a chance to writhe around in the grass like the snake Hannah thinks he is.

The reward for winning the backyard Hunger Games is pizza for everyone! So as the roomies sit down for dinner, Luke tries to coax Ciara out of the hot tub for a chat. But she’s still not having it. And her face tells Luke to back off. Let the woman soak in the hot tub! After being shut down once again, Luke pulls Carl Radke into his room to vent. He sees his chances with Ciara going up in smoke by the minute and desperately needs to right the sinking ship. Mixed metaphors!

Summer House Luke Gulbranson

Putting his damage control plan into effect, Luke asks Hannah to talk privately. On the front porch, he turns on a full-court charm offensive, saying all the right things to get back into Hannah’s good graces. Luke apologizes. There might even be some tears. He validates her feelings. He tries to undo all the gaslighting by agreeing they have a “special chemistry” neither can deny. And the good guy act works. When Hannah tearfully says she needs to set better boundaries and keep things between them platonic, it’s exactly what Luke wants to hear. Music to his ears in fact. He’s managed to mend fences with Hannah and look like the good guy, while still getting what he wants out of the situation.

But even if he’s doing it for the wrong reasons, I’m kind of relieved Luke and Hannah made up. Even if just for the mere fact that they’re going to be trapped together in the house for five more weeks. And no one wants to be subjected to a dozen more episodes of them going round for round. Especially not when so many more interesting things could be happening. Which, don’t worry, more drama is right around the corner.

Summer House Danielle Olivera Ciara Miller Hannah Berner

The next day, Luke‘s thrilled to inform Ciara that he made up with Hannah. Now they can get back to flirting, right? Wrong. She still wants to be left alone, rebuffing his trademark offer to ride on his motorcycle to the beach. Speaking of the beach, this is the first time the roommates have collectively left the house all summer. And I’m genuinely curious to know what permissions and protocols they needed to leave quarantine and bring production to a completely isolated beach in the Hamptons. Did Bravo literally clear out the beach to film?

When Lindsay Hubbard voices her sky-high expectations for her upcoming birthday and anniversary with Stephen Traversie, Ciara once again disproves her “not a girl’s girl” label by offering to lend HubbHouse some of her lingerie. Then the girls get into a fascinating conversation about gender equality in the workplace. Danielle Olivera is feeling under-appreciated as a woman in finance and tech. And laments having to constantly tone down her wardrobe at the office for fear of being seen as less competent than her mail counterparts. Ciara loves nursing because her appearance isn’t picked apart and judged the way it is when she’s modeling. These topics aren’t often addressed on reality TV, and I found the conversation both enlightening and empowering for all the ladies watching at home. Let women wear what they want to work!

Summer House Hannah Berner

Back at the house, Kyle calls a house meeting to discuss cleaning. Because of the pandemic, the roommates don’t have a cleaning lady this year. And so far, they’re not doing a great job of keeping their space livable. It’s not too terrible yet, but it’s important to nip problems like this in the bud before they spiral into complete squalor, right? Kyle points out that some of the roommates sleep in every day (ahem, Hannah and Paige DeSorbo), leaving the cleaning duties to the early risers. The magic cleaning fairies aren’t doing all the work for you, girls! Without naming names, he points out that the trash is almost never being taken out by the person who volunteered to, you know, take it out every day. That would be Hannah.

Hannah immediately gets defensive, claiming she takes the trash out all the time. But Bravo has all the footage, and isn’t afraid to prove she’s lying. But instead of just, like, apologizing and committing to do a better job at carrying her weight, Hannah turns the conversation into a fight by claiming Kyle‘s just jealous she can sleep more than he does. Umm, what? Oh, and also that he must be insecure in his relationship. She manages to throw Amanda under the bus too, by claiming that she might be OK with Kyle speaking to her disrespectfully, but Hannah won’t stand for it.

Summer House Amanda Batula Paige DeSorbo

At this remark, chaos erupts, with Amanda bursting into tears and throwing her cup at a retreating Hannah. Kyle explodes as Hannah hurls more insults about his age, his relationship, and oh, remember that time he cheated, too? What started as a conversation about household duties has become the perfect channel for all the resentment Kyle and Hannah have been holding against each other for years now. As the injured parties retreat to their corners with various roommates following after them, it’s clear this fight has deep roots and isn’t getting solved any time soon. Paige‘s attempts to mediate fall on deaf ears, and not even she can get Hannah to take any accountability for how she started the whole fight. Everyone goes to bed angry. And the trash still hasn’t been taken out.

The next morning, everything is put into perspective when tragedy strikes. As the rest of the house sleeps, Carl gets a phone call from his mom. His older brother has died from an accidental overdose. Police have just found his body. This news rocks poor Carl’s world. And he’s stuck in quarantine hundreds of miles away from his family. He’s opened up in the past about his brother’s years-long battle with addiction, and this is every family’s worst fear come to life. In shock and tears, he goes to Lindsay for support, just as she’s waking up to a birthday phone call. Absolutely heartbreaking, the episode ends with Carl sobbing in her arms as he processes the loss of his only brother.


[Photo Credit: Bravo]