Summer House Recap: Tears Of A Lumberjack

Last week’s Summer House ended on a tense cliffhanger, to say the least. Luke Gulbranson was screaming from the lobby. Carl Radke was ready to throw down in his underwear. Kyle Cooke was being physically restrained by Lindsay Hubbard. Everyone was involved in the fight. Well except, Paige DeSorbo and Hannah Berner, who stood speechless at the top of the stairs watching the chaos play out. It was easily the most intense moment in the show’s history.

So how does it end? With a bang and a fizzle, essentially. After all that anticipation, it turns out the build-up was the climax. No punches were thrown. No fighting happened at all, really. Carl went back to bed, shaken up and fuming. And Luke turned on his heel and left the house, staying in a hotel after being escorted by producers to get an overnight bag from his room. It was all a giant unleashing of tension and emotion with thankfully no physical violence.

That doesn’t mean there’s not a whole lot of talk though. Hannah and Paige are practically giddy as they fill Des Bishop and Perry Rahbar in over the phone on all the drama that went down. Ciara Miller‘s feeling responsible for helping escalate the conflict. Carl‘s threatening to make a necklace out of Luke‘s hair just to sell it back to him. The mood of the entire house is basically one big “What just happened?”

Summer House Carl Radke

The next morning, everyone in the house wakes up under a cloud of regret. Carl in particular describes it as a “moral hangover,” which sounds about accurate. He’s even questioning whether he should leave the house the same way Luke did. Oh and everyone’s hung over on the alcohol, too. Kyle‘s come to his senses, and Amanda Batula jumps into mediator mode, reminding her fiancé that he’s just as culpable as Luke for escalating the fight. Meanwhile, Lindsay‘s staying out of the post-fight speculation and commentary. After all, wasn’t it like two days ago that the house was accusing her of secretly hooking up with Luke? Anything she says will just make things worse.

In the backyard, Kyle and Carl decide to call Luke together. Surprisingly, he answers. I don’t think I would if I were in the same situation, you know? And it sounds like he’s cooled off and more levelheaded too. Kyle and Carl are quick to apologize, but suggest talking things out in person. Luke’s open to the idea. But privately, he still doesn’t know if he wants to come back to the house for the rest of the summer. So much for easy like Sunday morning…

Summer House Danielle Olivera

Lindsay, meanwhile, is dealing with a whole other dilemma. A full-on pregnancy scare. That’s right, she had sex with Stephen Traversie right before he left the house, and now her period is late. Naturally, she only confides this secret to Danielle Olivera, who’s stunned but more than willing to help her bestie take a pregnancy test. While they wait for the results, she grills Lindsay on the realities of this conundrum. Would she have a baby? Is she ready to be a mom? Would it change how she feels about Stravy? The answers to those questions are yes, yes and…maybe? A baby wouldn’t necessarily automatically make her get back together with her boyfriend. But she would certainly re-evaluate the situation.

However, none of it matters because the test comes back negative. Danielle‘s ecstatic and Lindsay looks visibly relieved. But honestly, the first question in my mind was, “Is this real?” It seems like awfully convenient timing. And like the perfect material for the episode’s B-plot amid all the guys’ fighting. But either way, I feel like it’s a good thing we won’t be adding an unplanned Summer House pregnancy to the mix. The house is already enough of a pressure cooker at the current moment if you ask me.

Summer House

Which leads us to Luke‘s return. He shows up with his tail between his legs and asks Kyle to meet him at the end of the driveway for a private heart-to-heart. (Side note: apparently the driveway to this summer’s house is so long that Kyle has to take a bathroom break mid-way on his walk to the end?) Both guys reiterate their apologies. Luke admits he felt ganged up on with everyone coming at him, and that’s why he snapped. He also stands his ground that he didn’t deserve to be spoken to the way Kyle did, and that’s true. For his part, Kyle admits he was fighting other people’s battles, and the real crux of Luke issue should be with Ciara and Hannah.

And just like that, Luke comes back to the house. The rest of the roommates are taken aback to see him so soon. (Danielle‘s reaction was particularly golden as she ran into him in the kitchen.) He has one other conversation with Carl out on their shared balcony, reiterating most of the things he said to Kyle. Carl says the intensity of Luke’s anger scared him in the moment, and also admits that his reaction had more to do with the grief surrounding his brother’s death than anything Luke actually did or said. Hearing Carl say he would give anything to fight with his brother again was just heartbreaking. The two hug it out, and seem to really mean it. This is how you maturely handle conflict resolution with friends you actually love!

Summer House

Everyone sits down for a family dinner and the vibe is…awkward. He may have talked things out with Kyle and Carl, but none of the girls know how to react to Luke casually sitting at the end of the table. Finally, Paige breaks the ice to check on him, which leads to Luke taking the floor and addressing the entire house. Through tears, he explains some of the reasons behind losing his temper, stemming from growing up in a house where yelling and screaming were normal life. Like everyone, he comes with internal baggage from his family life. In fact, his parents’ constant fighting is something he still deals with to this day.

It’s nice to see Luke so vulnerable and open, and suddenly I have nothing but sympathy for him. What is happening?? He also apologizes publicly to both Hannah and Ciara. He takes accountability for things he’s done wrong with both of them. And promises to respect both of their boundaries from here on out. Both girls are grateful for the apologies, though Ciara admits via confessional that it doesn’t mean she’s going to forget the events of the summer so quickly. But at least everyone can co-exist in peace now. At least we hope so…

Monday morning arrives, and it’s Kyle and Amanda‘s two-year engagement anniversary. As Kyle jokingly points out, that’s not exactly a normal relationship milestone to celebrate. But not many couples stay engaged as long as Kymanda have. To celebrate, the roommates decide to finally leave the house for the first time to go to dinner. Which can only mean one thing in the Hamptons: we’re going to Southampton Social Club, kids. The waiter is masked. There’s no one else around. A dinner at the gang’s favorite spot in the Hamptons was something I truly didn’t expect to see this season. And honestly, it’s a breath of fresh air after being cooped up in the house for the past several weeks — a couple trips to the beach notwithstanding.

Summer House

During the meal, Kyle sweetly re-proposes to Amanda with a gorgeous bouquet of flowers. Hannah and Danielle inform the roommates they’ve both invited their respective men to come to the house the following day. But the main topic of conversation is the veritable flower shop Lindsay‘s running out of her bedroom thanks to the constant deliveries from Stravy. She admits the attention is nice, even if he’s probably going broke by sending her flowers what seems like every other day. However, she also wants to know where he is in person. Oh HubbHouse, if you only knew what was happening back at the house this very moment…

Possibly coordinating with production, Stravy uses the group’s night out as the perfect excuse to sneak back into the house undetected. Masked up and with (more) flowers in hand, he goes to work setting up a surprise for Lindsay in the backyard. The roommates eventually come home from dinner, and everyone’s feeling great after way too many espresso martinis. (Except Carl, who’s recommitted to his sobriety after the weekend’s brawl.) In Lindsay’s room, Kyle questions why there’s music playing in the backyard. And reveals Stravy’s grand gesture to a shocked and speechless Lindsay. Surprise! He’s down below the balcony with “I [LOVE] YOU” spelled out in candles. And we’ll have to find out what Lindsay has to say next week!


[Photo: Bravo]