Below Deck Mediterranean Season 8, Episode 12 Recap: One Guest Goes Too Far

Below Deck Mediterranean Season 8, Episode 12 recap
Photo by: Fred Jagueneau/Bravo via Getty Images

After a week away, we’re back for our Below Deck Mediterranean Season 8, Episode 12 recap! Did you miss us ranting about the crew’s bad decisions? In this week’s episode, called “Sink or Swim,” one charter guest goes way too far. It’s a shame the crew didn’t choose to throw him overboard. Elsewhere, new stew Lily isn’t proving to be much of an asset to the interior team, while Luka is battling against Captain Sandy’s micromanagement of his deck team. Here’s everything that went down in Below Deck Med Season 8, Episode 12.

Butterfly Man Luka gets some advice

Below Deck Mediterranean Season 8, Episode 12 recap
Photo by: Fred Jagueneau/Bravo

We pick things up right where we left off; with Luka getting scolded by Captain Sandy. She’s not happy that the deck team were all on a break while he was off the boat. It meant that interior were left calling for an extra set of hands, to no avail. Luka tries to make the point that breaks are necessary to ensure his team is on the ball, but it falls on deaf ears. When he and Lara later realize that two of the interior were down in the cabins, that infuriates them even further.

Fortunately, Captain Sandy does apologize later in the episode. She makes it clear to Tumi that when interior are working meals for the guests, only one person should be down in the cabins. Lily might be green, but she should be able to turn over a room. Even if that means taking notes down on an iPad, rather than the trusty pen and paper that her chief stew would prefer she use.

The crew gains a new member in the form of Major Douche

Below Deck Mediterranean Season 8, Episode 12 recap
Photo by: Fred Jagueneau/Bravo

If Amish the charter guests wants to call Tumi out of her name, then we shall rebrand him as Major Douche. Despite the primary guest – and everybody else – heading to bed, Major Douche decides he wants more to drink. He also fancies a dip in the hot tub. Due to his copious alcohol intake that night, however, he finds himself in the crew mess. Then, he wanders over to the crew cabins, before letting himself in to both Haleigh and Jack’s rooms. This is a major safety issue.

Luka quickly tells him to get out, warning him that people are trying to sleep. When he’s sent back up to deck, it’s up to Kyle and Lara to ensure that he’s okay. Spoiler alert: Major Douche is NOT OKAY. He slips down one of the steps from the top deck, smashing his drink’s glass on the floor. Major Douche is lucky he doesn’t have any glass in his foot. Lara and Kyle rush to his aid, before sending him to bed for good.

Kyle knows Sandy will want to know exactly what’s gone down, so he wakes her up to give her a rundown. The next day, she tells her primary guest that he needs to get his friend under control, or he’ll be off the boat. Major Douche doesn’t step a bloodied toe out of line for the rest of the charter – at least from what we see.

The spirit of Natalya looms

Natalya Scudder for Below Deck Med Season 8
Photo by: Laurent Basset/Bravo

We know Natalya is set to make a brief comeback to the show on a night out, but her presence is still felt even before then. She’s been texting Luka about how much she’d love some “cuddles,” and he’s flirting right back. He tells her he misses her, and while Jack has been doing the same, we know Luka isn’t doing it just as a friend, but someone who would totally bang Natalya if she didn’t come with the baggage of a controlling boyfriend.

The only problem? Luka is now enjoying regular nights of hot, steamy passion with Jessika. They even sleep together in this episode, judging by the noises made, and the sight of Luka’s peach entering the cabin bathroom after the fact. Things are going to get very interesting when Natalya returns; especially considering her lack of love for Jess. But, as we know, Jess and Max will also be swapping spit. It’s so incestuous this year!

Jack and Kyle clear the air

Below Deck Mediterranean Season 8, Episode 12 recap
Photo by: Fred Jagueneau/Bravo

On their night out, Jack and Kyle engage in a short back-and-forth. While Jack’s banter doesn’t land, the pair do manage to get on the right track. Kyle has been having a really emotional time on the boat, and it doesn’t seem to be a healthy place for him. So, I was shocked by the maturity he showed when he actually spoke to Jack, asking him if they were “cool.”

Jack said he didn’t respond well to Kyle’s warning of Lily about Natalya’s influence. He said he had been “passive aggressive,” and the two promised to get along moving forward. “Now I can drink with joy and not drink to forget, Kyle said in confessional. We’ll see how long this ceasefire lasts…

Can Lily do her job?

Below Deck Mediterranean Season 8, Episode 12 recap
Photo by: Fred Jagueneau/Bravo

It’s clear across the length of charter two that Lily is struggling. To be fair, there hasn’t been much in the way of training. But she also seems to be unable to cope with even the little stuff she’s been shown. Tumi’s growing tired of it, and so are the rest of the crew.

The episode ends with Captain Sandy asking Lily how she’s finding the job. She then issues a veiled threat; if Lily doesn’t step up on this third charter, she’ll probably have to let her go.

Will interior ever catch a break?

Below Deck Mediterranean continues Mondays at 9/8c on Bravo.