Randall Emmett

Whew – we have crossed the finish line with season 7 of Vanderpump Rules and I am here to report that this reunion did not need to be 3 parts. There – recap done!

OK, kidding. I actually felt there were some illuminating moments. Like the glimpse of Katie Maloney‘s hubris. Wowee-wow-WOW. Katie literally always sees herself as the victim. She blames James Kennedy for the internet hating her but the internet rightfully hated Katie long before her antics this season! As Tom 1 never really got a chance to say courtesy of James’ interrupitis – a germ passed from Kristen Doute – Katie has been a rancid bottle of ranch dressing since season 1. Katie’s OWN putrid behavior is the reason the Twitterverse rails on her – it has nothing to do with James or her weight (or her husband’s manhood – how is that not also body shaming?). Let’s just say Katie is giving marriage, ranch dressing, the internet, and humanity a bad name. Oh, and also clothing.

I’m having a visceral reaction to part 2 of the Vanderpump Rules reunion. It’s like Lord Of The Flies. James Kennedy is the pig they’re chasing across the island of the doomed until somebody, (probably Tom 2 if we’re being honest) winds up dismembered. Remember when this show was so fun?!

What I’ve come to realize is that these people – chiefly Katie Maloney, Jax Taylor, and Kristen Doute – live in an echo chamber of their own delusions. They can’t learn from experiences because they’ve blocked all the dissenting voices. Instead, they are deafened by the vortex of praise they offer each other. James isn’t even allowed to speak without Kristen cutting him off and screaming him down with some accusation or insult. Andy Cohen wonders why James so angry. Lisa Vanderpump decides it’s because James had a drink at lunch. Or maybe it’s as James said: so many people yelling at him constantly that he can’t breathe.

Last night was the Met Gala and also someone was thrown out of a PTA meeting at my kids’ school when things erupted into a full-on screaming match. Fittingly, it was also part 1 of Vanderpump Rules reunion – so yeah, busy night!

Also as if trying to straddle two events, like she straddles two worlds on Vanderpump Rules, Raquel Leviss‘s reunion dress was the very definition of the Met Gala theme “Camp,” boasting uber-exaggerated shoulders accented by a full duvet of ruffles. It was like a super amped up version of an Alice In Wonderland dress. I loved it. It was almost a perfect representation for the ridiculousness of this show. Raquel came to make a statement that she is here to stay.