Time to recap the 3rd episode of the Real Housewives of Atlanta titled ‘White Hot.’
This episode brought us fame monsters, threats to unborn babies and the magical appearance of Sheree’s eldest daughter. The episode starts out with Kim Gaga verbally abusing her assistant Sweetie, while also packing for her big live concert in front of the biggest gay dance party in the universe. Evidently, lip syncing to an auto-tuned backtrack takes a lot of preparation.
Nene takes her youngest son Brent out for a walk in the park. The two share a tender mother and son moment during which Nene brings up the topic of Bryson’s arrest. Nene states in her interview that she did not want to go into the arrest details with Brent due to his young age, but something tells me at age 11, Brent is well aware of all that is going on around him.
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Miss She by Sheree invites the ever so messy Dwight over to confront him about the “rumors” he has been spreading around. For some reason, Dwight showed up with his publicist, perhaps it’s for protection against the “crazy heifers” as Phaedra so eloquently described them last week. Sheree wants to know how Dwight managed to spend $30,000 on her fashion show. Dwight seems tongue tied in trying to explain how he spent that amount of money, stating he spent $1200 on a seamstress, and a big amount on making copies and prints at Kinkos. Quite frankly, it makes zero sense that anyone in their right mind would spend that amount of money on someone who’s not even a friend of theirs, especially during a recession. Yeah, I’m definitely not buying the claims of this Stunt Queen.
“Dwight and I are not friends, so he’s just randomly giving out $30,000? That doesn’t makes any sense. If he had $30,000, don’t you think you’d get your nose fixed so you can breath?” wonders Sheree in her interview, echoing Nene’s earlier sentiments. But Sheree does bring up an excellent point, since Dwight volunteered to help her with the fashion show, then why go around telling people how much money he spent on the show? Especially after she had said thank you. The scene ends peacefully as the two ladies decide to move on from the issue.
Next, we see Kim and her assistant Sweetie driving around Florida in their “bright ass yellow lamborghini” which Kim pretends was all the doing of Sweetie. The fame monster decides to pee in a public restroom and makes certain her assistant holds the door for her. Something about the way Kim is treating and talking down to Sweetie is just robbing me the wrong way. No way in heck I would allow any boss or employer to treat me that way. It was a tad much for me.
We see Kandi, who Kim’s trying to make her back-up singer, waiting for Kim at their hotel. The fame monster arrives in her Lamborghini with a limo trailing behind with her luggage. Kandi is starting to take notice of Kim’s diva behavior and she is not a fan. Kandi reluctantly agrees to appear on stage with Kim.
“Supermodel” Cynthia is shown with her sister/assistant Malorie. And upon watching this scene and all the other housewives with assistants, I’ve come to the conclusion that the only thing missing from my life is an assistant. I’m really not sure why Kim Zolciak needs an assistant as sleeping with rich married men isn’t exactly a strenuous job. Cynthia once again brings up Peter’s ultimatum, and I must say I’m starting to get bored with this storyline.
Scarlett O‘Hara wannabe Phaedra, who is “a lawyer and not a homemaker” is preparing breakfast for she and her husband Apollo because that’s what every proper Southern woman does. “Apollo was in prison for racketeering which is really a white collar crime. He is no different from Martha Stewart. He served his time and people need to just get over it,” states the lawyer in her interview. The topic of conversation turns to how their soon to be born son will be raised and Phaedra states Apollo isn’t too familiar with the black way of raising a child due to the fact that he was raised in a white household. Phaedra brings the lols when she states, “If he looks at me sideways, I’m gonna beat the hell out of him.” Apollo disagrees.
A stylist brings some clothes over for the fame monster to check out and pick one for her “performance.” The event organizer, Jeffrey Sanker, arrives with his boytoy assistant Jose and Kim immediately swoons over him. Kandi states the obvious what we’re all thinking when she says Jose is likely not Kim’s type in her interview.
Sheree arrives in her rented Range Rover to pay her 24-year-old daughter Tierra a visit at her new apartment. We find out the reason Tierra has been MIA from the show was because she was away at college and not the widely reported stories that Sheree did not want anyone knowing she had a daughter during her teen years. Sheree has a heart to heart with Tierra, who is now living with her boyfriend of 5 years, and makes it clear she is not ready to be anybody’s grandma or nana.
It’s the day of the performance and Kim has to rehearse. Following the objectification of her shirtless background dancers, Kim practices stepping out of a giant martini glass while covering up her vajayjay. Kandi shows up to support her friend and stresses the importance of practicing while also giving her some advice. It’s interesting to see Kandi’s attitude towards Kim, both during the show and in her interviews. It’s all but obvious she is so over the fame monster. Can you blame her? Kim is making a total mockery of her career. But then again, we can all credit Kandi for creating this monster in particular.
The Nidas have a nice dinner with their relationship mentors (And no, I’ve never heard of relationship mentors either), which were assigned to them from their church. Phaedra shares she actually dated Apollo while she was in college and before he went to jail, admitting she did marry him just months upon his release following 5 years in prison. Something about marrying someone just months after a 5-year-prison stint just seems like a very very bad idea. When asked how they are doing, Apollo gives an interesting answer when he says “we’re hanging on.” Apollo is not a fan of the fancy dish his wife had catered created for the evening and Phaedra believes the reason for that is because Apollo grew up in a white household and is more used to eating simpler camp dishes.
When it comes to what they need in their marriage, Apollo declares he wants quality time while Phaedra would rather have gifts. With that kind of contrast in their marital needs and the soon to be arrival of their first child, I can’t help but wonder if these two are going to make it.
Kim is shown getting ready for her big “performance,” and what better way to warm up your vocals than puffing on a cigarette. Upon arriving to the event, Kim starts complaining that her boobs are popping out. The stylist immediately adds straps to Kim’s dress to fix the boob issue, that is until Kim steps outside and with a gust of wind, a vajayjay issue ensues. The stylist once again steps in to fix the wardrobe malfunction for the fame monster, finishing just in time for her ‘performance.”
The “performance” goes off without a hitch. Oddly enough, the highlight of the show was Kandi coming out and interacting with the crowd. Kim thanks Kandi after the performance and Kandi tells Kim she is proud of her. The episode ends and the ‘Tardy For The Party’ tune is forever stuck in my brain.
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