Bethenny Ever After Recap: Bombshells On The Beach

On last night’s episode of Bethenny Ever After the team continued their Mexican adventure which coincided with Bethenny Frankel and Jason Hoppy continuing their marital meltdown, but strangely they seem to be making some small strides and at least they are communicating. Somewhat. Maggie, Bethenny’s beleaguered intern quit and then there were three Skinnygirlians.

Team Frankel is still in Mexico, but things are in a much happier mood than last week. Bethenny and the girls, plus Jason, start out with breakfast and a little trip to the beach vendor. Bethenny is a little steamed that she thinks she got ripped off by the sarong vendor and wants to go for round two to haggle for a better price. She runs into a jewelery vendor instead and falls in love with a fantastic necklace that she really wants. He won’t come down on the price, so she throws the less emotionally invested Jason into the mix. Jason has no luck either and Bethenny promises to run into “hermano” again and make the necklace hers.

Later Bethenny does find Hermano and is able to negotiate a deal to get Julie and Jackie some jewelery and score the necklace. Hey – she’s rich! Jewelery for all!

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Side note: She looks amazing for someone who claims they never have time to work out and only does her workout video “when she can.” Hmmmm… What’s the real secret to body by Bethenny?

Afterwards Bethenny and Jason head to music therapy on the beach. Bethenny is up for any form or therapy because it seems no amount of working on their marriage is sufficient. She cites the 21 hours they spent lost at sea where pretty much nothing changed. The music therapists have been married 27 or 28 years depending on whom you ask of the husband and wife team. Jason announces that Bethenny is always right and Bethenny continues her lewd inappropriateness by grabbing some maracas and calling them Jason’s balls as she shakes them in front of her boobs. They seemed to be having a good time and there was lots of laughing and giggling. At least they’re still trying. I’ll give’m that!

Jason, RaRa, Bethenny, and Bryn go check out a church and a food festival. At the church Jason muses about how it would be perfect for a wedding – or a vow renewal given that their anniversary is coming up. A fact Bethenny has no awareness or memory of. What she does seem interested in is baptising Bryn for the third time. You know, I wouldn’t let Bravo film that, B, they – as you well know – haven’t the best of luck with Christenings!

Outside the church Veronica starts to cry, saying she misses her family. Bethenny and Jason console her and let her know she’s part of their family. Which may not be such a great consolation prize. Bethenny drops the bomb that they want Veronica to assume guardianship of Bryn if something were to happen to them, and Veronica is more than happy to accept.

Ok – look, Veronica seems like a lovely person, who truly adores Bryn. Really she does – she seems sweet, down to earth, and kind. But exactly how long has Bethenny known this person? Do you even remember her on the show last year? Isn’t JULIE Bryn’s godmother? What about Bethenny’s lifelong best friend Terri, who is also a mom? This just reeks of publicity stunt and I hope RaRa is in on it. Judging by the tears she seems to believe it’s legit that the Frankel-Hoppys would leave Bryn in her care, but I just find it beyond puzzling that they would alter their will to leave Bryn with Bethenny’s “glammy.”  Please tell me I’m not the only cynic in the audience…

Afterwards they hit up the food fest, which is really more of a complicated recipe demo. It had about 600 steps and Bethenny provided non-stop commentary about how complicated and unskinnygirl a recipe it was. Bethenny and Jason meet a new friend named Liz, who is a producer plant seems like she may have escaped from the institution or something because she assumes Bethenny is someone completely different. Someone Liz allegedly knows. Bethenny and Jason go along with it for a bit until Bethenny confesses she’s not Mary Anne or whomever Liz assumed she was, but they can still be friends. What was that? How could that woman think she knew Bethenny, but as someone else? This show is becoming like Alice In Wonderland. It’s stranger and stranger with every twist and turn.

That night, over margaritas of course, Jason announces they have to be out of their old apartment in 30 days, but the new place is far, far from ready. And Julie is leaving and Maggie is pretty much a complete useless blob of small town meekness, so Bethenny is going to have start ramming roman candles up peoples asses. Bethenny chastises Maggie in front of the entire team and basically calls her out as spineless and naive; saying she better turn into a sherpa and attack people with ram horns on the mountain. Scary Mexico! What the heck does being a Sherpa have to do with working for Skinnygirl?

Maybe if Betheny is so concerned about people being tough, ball-busting businesswomen she shouldn’t hire 22-year-olds who graduated from college last week? Just a thought…

The next day the team heads out to sea for some sort of boating jaunt. They take a dingy or something out to a speed boat, but the waves are rough and Bethenny is rightfully very worried about Bryn. She decides to turn back, drop off Bryn and leave her with pseudo-mommy RaRa while she and Julie meet up with Jason, Maggie, and Jackie on the big boat. Good thing Bethenny always has someone to ditch her kid with!

Poor Jason, feeling sea sick and annoyed, is trapped on the big boat with Jackie, who wearing a Gilligan’s Island skipper hat and Maggie, who is crying and won’t tell anyone why, but claims her eyes hurt. Which they do. From crying.

Oh for the love of Jesus another boat drama. I am so done with this show. I’m with Jason, “Stop it with the boats!”

Jason, trying to be empathetic, suggests Maggie go back to shore on the next boat. Maggie runs into Bethenny and Julie on the beach and refuses to tell them why she’s so upset and runs towards the hotel. Bethenny gleefully deduces that Maggie is so quitting. They’ve lost another one. Can’t wait to read Bethenny’s blog about how much Maggie just wasn’t right for the team.

Everyone is so cavalier about Maggie wanting to quit; it was sort of gross. Jason and Julie have a heart-to-heart about Julie leaving and Jason joining the Skinnygirl team. Julie is now playing marriage counselor; advising them to live life like ripping off a band-aid. It’s good, solid advice.

Team Frankel arrives back on the beach and unanimously decide boats just aren’t their thing. Bethenny used to love boats until reality TV entered her life – and then boats became a source of drama, conflict, and ratings grabs. She makes a serious funny about being trapped on a boat to St. John with lunatics. Oh, Bethie – those were the good ol’ days when you were queen and could do no wrong in the eyes of viewers.

Bethenny and Jason have dinner, which quickly descends into a relationship talk. It starts out good, honest and frank without getting dirty or hurtful. Jason admits he hasn’t found his passion in life and he’s sort of jealous of Bethenny’s amazing career accomplishments. It’s also sort of hard for him to have a wife that’s the big success in their marriage when he feels so unfulfilled. He wants to work with Skinnygirl because he enjoys it, but as Bethenny points out – it’s still not his thing; the thing he loves.

Jason muses that Bethenny doesn’t know what it’s like to have a standard job, which she disagrees with. Although when was she working these 9-5s? In between being on 65 reality shows? He also feels like Bethenny doesn’t understand having a job that is just a job.

Rather quickly the argument turns nasty; with Jason claiming he feels judged for not being as professionally successful or passionate about his work. He says these feelings have to come from somewhere as they only started when he got married. Bethenny, rightfully, calls him out his BS and insists that they are coming from inside. I think she’s right. Being with her has made him realize he is professionally lacking and he feels like he let himself down. He’s projecting onto her. How’s that for some armchair therapist!

Jason leaves the table when things get heated after an argument about Bethenny making everything about her and making him feel insecure or something. Really, I kinda lost track. Although I applaud them for discussing their issues openly. Bethenny insists she hasn’t changed and Jason knew what he was getting into when he chose her. And I agree. Jason chose Bethenny. He chose her life; reality TV fame, Skinnygirl, and all the crazy. Jason comes back to the table and the slate has been wiped clean.

They agree – it’s a long road but they will get through it. They toast to getting through it and bond over food. Jason is exhausted over the conflict and Bethenny feels rejuvenated. Which may just be the nexus of their issues – she thrives on conflict and he hates it. They deduce it could be worse. I mean, they could have financial issues and infidelity; they just can’t stand each other, but they love each other. At the very least, misery loves company.

You know what, call me crazy but I kinda want these two to work.  I kinda love them together!

Next Week: Nick does yoga. Jason is a food hog, amongst other things and problems in their marriage continue as Jason continues to contemplate joining the Skinnygirl team.

TELL US – WILL BETHENNY AND JASON MAKE IT? DID MAGGIE QUIT?



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