It's been a big week for Kim Kardashian, y'all! Not only did she celebrate her thirty-third birthday, but she got engaged for the third time to tiny rapper Kanye West who finally made peace with Jimmy Kimmel (seriously, I am still laughing about that!). If that wasn't enough, new daughter North West debuted this week on Keeping up with the Kardashians. As you could expect, Kim kept it klassy for all of these events.
Let's begin with the show, shall we? Confession time…I.
sometimes every once in a while rarely watch KUWTK. I'm not even that ashamed of it. In fact, I tend to find the majority of the family (read: Bruce Jenner, Kendall Jenner, Khloe Kardashian—who grates on my nerves like the remaining family members when I read stuff like this–and the Jenner boys) likeable on the show. The entire shiny E! klan is separate and different from the fame lovers I love to loathe in the 'loids. That said, Kim was just plain gross on this week's episode, and I don't give two flying flips about her third (and no, I don't think this one's the charm) wedding.
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Just for giggles, let's rehash what Kim told Khloe on KUWTK about her priorities post childbirth. Here's a hint, they go something like this: bond with baby; make sure baby didn't create a cavernous abyss out of her lady parts; and finally pose for a nudie mag. Bless her. On the episode, Kim reveals, "When I came back from the hospital the first thing I did was go and look at my vagina in the mirror. It looks better-looking than before." Um. Ew.
Calling out her haters, Kim continues, "I just want to come out to the world, and be naked and be like, 'I look so hot. I am back.'" I mean, I can't make up this stuff, folks! At least Kim didn't alienate any other moms or those (like her sister) who suffer from fertility issues with insensitive comments. Oh wait. Last gem, I promise! Kim on childbirth: "Labor was honestly the easiest thing ever. I did not feel one thing. Like, it was not hard." Oh Kim. Kim, Kim, Kim. Do you have any sort of filter? #rhetoricalquestion
Moving on to her most recent engagement (it's almost like Groundhog's Day but with a much shorter and more famous groom), Kim is handing the planning reins to Kanye. Can you blame her? He's a creative genius after all! Plus, he's never gotten to plan a wedding before, and Kim's probably super bored of seating charts and floral arrangements by now.
Speaking to People, Kim
pretends shares that her filmed engagement was an "absolute, complete surprise," adding, "We honestly haven't had a moment to talk about it or even breathe, so we haven't really talked about it, but whatever he wants."
Of the over-the-top proposal, Kim admits, "I was shaking so much, shaking the entire time. Like, 'Is this really happening?' It was like an out-of-body experience," explaining that the only part of wedding that she's confirmed is that step-dad Bruce will be walking her down the aisle. Poor Bruce…once a pawn, always a pawn.
TELL US-DO YOU BUY THAT KIM WILL LET KANYE DO ALL THE WEDDING PLANNING? DID YOU WATCH THIS WEEK'S KUWTK? IF SO, WHAT DID YOU THINK?
[Photo Credit: DJDM/WENN.com]