Last night on Ladies of London the women got a lesson in etiquette and then promptly forgot everything they learned. The divide between Caprice Bourret and Caroline Stanbury widened. And Noelle Reno continued to stir the pot. It’s what she does best.
We begin at Slades Farm, Annabelle Neilson’s home. She has checked herself out of the hospital and is recovering from her accident. Caroline arrives with gifts: DVD’s and a huge TV. Where was Caroline when I was sick? Annabelle is doing well, all things considered. She asks what’s going on, namely with the Caprice situation. Caroline tells her how Noelle and Marissa are planning a baby shower/going away party for Caprice. She’s still irked by it. Annabelle advises her to take the high road. Caroline doesn’t think she can, but Annabelle urges her to do it.
Meanwhile Caprice is freaking out on her boyfriend, Ty. Their surrogate is dilating and Caprice wonders if they should leave early to go back to the US. Ty is completely chill. But he’s the only one not having a baby so it’s not surprising. They call the surrogate and she says they don’t need to rush home. Caprice calms down. For now.
Meanwhile, Caroline is planning a dinner party with her assistant, Rania. Everyone is invited, including Caprice. Caroline chooses not to ostracize her. She’ll just talk behind her back. Caroline tells Rania that she needs to hire an etiquette instructor. She’s going for a My Fair Ladies of London moment. She doesn’t want a repeat of the Mapperton “cafeteria” dinner.
Back at Slades (not Smiley) Farm, Caprice and Julie visit Annabelle. For some reason Caprice thinks she needs to whisper. Because Annabelle hurt her ears when she was thrown off that horse. Annabelle wants to hear the latest gossip. Caprice launches into the Caroline drama. She doesn’t want to go to the dinner party. Annabelle tells her that this is minor. Caroline & Caprice need to mend bridges. She is very Zen in this episode. Caprice has another freak out about her impending motherhood. Annabelle calms her down. For now.
It’s time for etiquette class. Rosemary will be our instructor. She’s a battleaxe (Caroline’s words) and I love her. Right off the bat she scolds Noelle Reno for plunking herself down without being offered a seat first. Noelle is not amused. Juliet arrives and wonders if it’s proper etiquette to be late. She has failed already. Rosemary explains that she’s there to assist them after the disastrous Mapperton dinner. We get a montage of Juliet and Noelle doing everything wrong and Rosemary scolding them over and over. And over. It’s fun. Caroline takes the etiquette lesson from the table to the streets. We get to see the “keep being ruder” fight for the 80th time. Caroline says you shouldn’t argue in the streets like a fish wife. Real Fish Wives of London? Rosemary agrees. Juliet is ready to thrown down with the etiquette instructor. I have a feeling Rosemary could take her. In a very courteous way. Juliet says she likes to address things so they don’t fester. She could teach the Brits how to be more honest. Rosemary does not want to take that class. Juliet finally concedes that maybe she should adapt to the British ways. This has been a learning experience for her. The more you know.
Meanwhile, Caprice is crying. Again. She’s still worried about her surrogate and she has her big By Caprice campaign coming up. Plus, she’s hormonal as hell. Julie calms her down. For now.
Noelle is preparing for a night out with the Ladies. She tells Scot that Caroline and Caprice are not getting along. She’s stuck in the middle. It’s stressful being friends with them both. Scot nods and pretends to listen. I think he’s happy not being in the center of the drama for a change.
Across town, Caroline and Juliet prepare to meet the others. Caroline says she’s growing fond of Juliet. She’s her favorite minion. Later, Caroline, Juliet Angus, Marissa Hermer, and Noelle arrive at the Wellington Club. They’ve gathered to celebrate Marissa’s citizenship and the iconic London landmark is the perfect place for it. We meet Jake, the owner & Caroline’s friend. He talks about Caroline’s wild child days, which don’t really seem that wild at all. Jake gives them a tour of the club, including a naughty tinsel room. Talk quickly turns to Caprice’s baby shower/going away party. Marissa tries to downplay the shower part and emphasize the going away of it all. Caroline is not fooled. Juliet wonders why Marissa and Noelle are throwing the party. Are they really that close to Caprice? Could they even pass a “how well do you know Caprice” test? Will there be an essay portion? Caroline accuses Noelle of flip-flopping between her and Caprice. Boom. Marissa gets defensive and says someone needs to plan the party. As if NOBODY else in all of London could do it. In her interview, Caroline says Caprice is just using Marissa and Noelle. I kind of think she’s right.
It’s time for the By Caprice photo shoot. This will be the first time that she’s not appearing in one of her campaigns. But, she’ll direct it. Caprice knows what sells: big hair and even bigger boobs. We also get some butt shots. It’s a T & A fest. Straight guys, this is your moment. After the shoot, Noelle comes around to see Caprice. She brings up the shower/going away party. Caprice can’t attend. She’s leaving the UK early to be with her surrogate. All that drama for nothing. Noelle mentions Caroline and how she’s been giving her a hard time about the shower. Caprice gets upset. Here we go. She can’t believe how mean Caroline is being. Noelle is surprised by this reaction and tries to backpedal. But it’s too late. Noelle wonders what she started. Exactly what you set out to do.
It’s the day of the dinner party. Caroline meets with the chef to go over the menu. They’ll be lots of options for everyone. No food passing tonight. She goes outside to meet with Luke (yay!) and Rania to discuss the guest list. Caprice is coming, but she’ll be late. Caroline is annoyed. Already starting on a good note. Caroline notes that they’ll need plenty of vodka for Noelle. Luke wonders if she’ll require a barrel. He’s not far off the mark.
Later, Marissa and Juliet pick up Noelle for the party. Noelle is wearing a short gold dress. Or as Marissa describes it: a cross between Jane Jetson and the high school prom. I actually didn’t think it’s that bad. For her. Noelle has brought a bottle of champagne for Caroline. So of course the natural thing to do is to open it and start drinking in the car. Rosemary would be proud. Noelle tells them about her earlier encounter with Caprice. Juliet thinks Noelle is stirring the pot and intentionally making herself the middleman.
The Ladies arrive at Caroline’s house. Noelle presents Caroline with the lovely half-empty bottle of champagne. Caroline can tell that she’s drunkity-drunk-drunk. Clearly etiquette class worked. Meanwhile, Caprice is just leaving home to go to the party. She’s nervous, but isn’t crying for once. Back at the party, Noelle tells Julie that she hates being in the middle of Caprice and Caroline’s drama. Caroline can pick up on Noelle’s guilt. She knows when a minion is going astray. Dinner begins and it looks delicious. Marissa thinks Caroline is having the big dinner to show Caprice what she missed out on. The whole thing just makes me hungry. In Caprice’s car, she says that she’s coming to the party with good intentions. Let’s see how long that lasts. Back at dinner, Marissa wonders where Caprice could be. And for some reason Noelle thinks is the best time to lean in and loudly whisper to Marissa about Caprice freaking out earlier. Because nobody will notice. Oh Noelle.
Next week it’s the season finale. The dinner party drama kicks into high gear. Plus, Caprice’s babies arrive.
Recap Author: Geoff
TELL US – ARE YOU SAD TO SEE LADIES OF LONDON COME TO AN END ALREADY?
Photo Credit: Rebecca Miller/Bravo