Amber Marchese and Family

Amber Marchese is new to reality TV, but she’s already getting a dose of the slanders and realizing that viewers judge EVERYTHING! 

Amber reminds us that although it is reality TV, it’s still just TV and most things (barring Teresa Giudice‘s legal woes) on Real Housewives of New Jersey are not that serious. 

“I wanted to clarify a few things from last week before I get into the details of this episode, especially after reading the twins’ blogs (I can’t help myself). The only thought that comes to mind with them is… chill out! None of us should take ourselves so seriously, especially considering we signed up for a reality show. I really hope everyone can see that I like to cut up and have fun,” Amber encourages. “I am giggling the entire time during my interviews. There will be moments that I tease others and moments that I get teased, nothing more than good-spirited fun. We are not curing cancer, nor am I conducting my oral thesis for a PHD.”


Amber also admits that she sometimes needs to borrow the RHONJ dictionary that Kathy Wakile knows they all need! “I do have to make one point about my term, “Guidette Book of Etiquettecy.” OK, everyone, if you are going to give me grief every time I make a grammatical error, you are going to have a lot of material. Yes, I did graduate from an Ivy League school, but that was seven years ago and I have been a mother ever since. My brain has officially leaked out of my head. I have traded in my books with subjects that included neurophysiology, physiology, brain adaptation, and neuroplasticity to Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss.”

Next Amber tackles the episode and for the most part she keeps it very positive. Although she does remind her friend Terehhssssa Aprea that a tradition isn’t an ethnicity one can be “orientated” towards. The RHONJ tradition of creative vocabularying continues with a new Teresa! 

Speaking of Teresas, Amber thinks it’s sweet seeing Juciy show his love to Teresa Giudice. Yeah, Amber – you shoulda been around for some of the earlier seasons. He wasn’t so Mr. Hallmark back then (c-u-next-tuesday!). “It is also so nice to see how close Teresa and Joe are,” Amber reflects. “Watching them in front of the fireplace was heart-wrenching for us. We hate seeing anyone go through difficult times, especially loving parents.” I personally was most impressed that Juicy could write a card – he must have had help! 

Amber has less kind words for the gift her friend (use the RHONJ definition of ‘friend’ here), Nicole Napolitano‘s boyfriend Bobby gave her! “I have to say, that was some present Bobby gave to Nicole. Nine months together and Nicole invites her ‘boyfriend’ over for their first Christmas with her mother and what does he get her? A tacky pink shoe wine bottle holder.”

“We are talking about a man whose family is the owner of a car empire and he gets her a shoe, not even a pair! It is not about how little money he spent on it, it was lack of thought that went into the present. I could think of a thousand other presents to give to Nicole that would mean so much more to her. Perhaps getting her a necklace with her sons’ initials? That is inexpensive, and her boys mean the world to her. I think the best though, was when Nicole’s mother, Santa, called him out on buying it at the Colts Neck Pharmacy. For the record, he must have bought the shoe at the Colts Neck Pharmacy, ” because I have seen it there, too. Score one for Mom calling out bullsh– when she sees it. ” Ouch – so I guess Amber doesn’t have much love for Nicole’s boyfriend – it seems no one does! 

Well, so far I’m on the fence about Amber. I want to try and like all the new girls – and I have to admit I’m curious to see what she has on Melissa Gorga. I definitely don’t see Amber and Nicole staying friends throughout the season – just as Andy intended… 


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