my-five-wives

On last night’s My Five Wives, Brady Williams comes up with a not-so-bright idea, becomes a grandpa, and celebrates Father’s Day with his 24 kids.

It’s another fine day at the polygamous compound, and Brady leaps out of Robyn’s bed to start the day by visiting each of his other wives for his “good morning” routine. Rosemary is feeling down and out. Nonie reminds us that she is still trying for another baby, while Paulie is empty-nesting it and keeping up with her running. All of the wives, and Brady, are feeling like they’re not getting enough time with each other. Brady says his main challenge is “being fair with his time.” I thought his biggest challenge was bankrolling the lives of 29 dependents?

Father’s Day is coming up and Rhonda is organizing the 24 kids into some serious craft-making for the big day. The youngest kids are super cute talking about how they want to make special cards for their dad. Meanwhile, Paulie is off to visit her oldest daughter, Karlie, who is married to ONE man & is living nearby. Paulie comments that she supports Karlie’s decision to be monogamous. Karlie reveals she’s pregnant! The first grandbaby of 5 thousand grandbabies from Brady’s brood, no doubt. Karlie then confesses she’d like to have 7 or 8 children. Oy vey.

Brady and his brother Jared are at their construction business. The camera pans to a poster board with sharpie-squiggles on it and we’re supposed to take this as a sign that “business is booming!” No mention of the looming bankruptcy yet. Brady laments how little time he has for his wives these days, so he wants to propose an idea: taking the wives out on double dates instead of 1-on-1 dates. I don’t know if Brady understands that 5 is not equally divisible by 2. But then again, he also doesn’t understand how ovulation or conception works, so meh. Who cares? Double dates for all!

Brady takes all of the wives out to eat for their weekly family meeting. He discusses how tight the finances are, then launches in to his Indecent Proposal: double dating. The wives look like they want to punch him. I wonder how Brady feels receiving the “disappointed wife” look from 5 separate individuals at the exact same time. #yousignedupforthisromeo

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Back at the compound, Brady and Rhonda discuss Rhonda’s health issues. She needs further testing to determine whether her (benign) breast lump is still OK. Rhonda’s mother died of breast cancer, so Rhonda is scared about her own fate. Brady encourages Rhonda to do all she can to ensure that her health is protected. She decides to schedule a mammogram that week. Later, the entire 30-person family is gathered for dinner, which reminds Brady of his enormous responsibility as a father and as a breadwinner. #2bucksinyourcheckingaccount

The ladies clean up after dinner and discuss The Proposal. Robyn (of all people!) says she thinks the double date idea is a good one. The other ladies sort of half-heartedly agree, but confess in their private interviews that they still need their single dates with Brady for their marriage to survive. In a twisted Think Tank moment, the wives come up with a brilliant plan to thwart their beloved husband. The verdict: all 5 agree that double dates are ok, but they still want their single dates too. I don’t think this is what Brady had in mind, but I find the outcome HILARIOUS. Note to Brady: no more dimwitted ideas for awhile, ok? You are vastly outnumbered, dude. These women will outplay, outwit, and probably outlast you.

The wives present their verdict to Brady, who won’t admit that his plan has backfired, but…his plan has backfired. He requests that the wives at least take charge of setting up the double dates. They oblige by choosing names out of a jar and choosing date ideas out of another jar. Our first double daters are Paulie and Rosemary, who have a history of hurt feelings between them. They plan a kayaking trip. Sounds, uh……romantic?

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Karlie and Jake have Brady and Paulie over for dinner and share their pregnancy news with them. Brady is stoked and says he’s been waiting for this “for a whole year.” He is a man of boundless patience. The four of them actually have a sweet moment giggling about it together and almost seem like a regular family of 4. Then Brady talks about how he might be having his own baby with Nonie soon AND having a grandbaby in the same year. Later, Brady does his “good night” routine at home, which involves kissing each of his 5 wives goodnight in their respective homes before finally landing in Rhonda’s for the night. And just that quickly, we are brought back to the reality of the bizarre situation.

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Paulie and Rosemary prepare for their double date. Paulie’s daughter points out that a “double date” should actually involve TWO whole couples, not 1 guy and 2 gals, but Paulie doesn’t want to hear it. The kayaking trip begins and Brady says it stresses him out when his wives have tension between them. Groan. Get a grip, man! You married FIVE WOMEN. The 3 double-daters head down the river in their kayaks. Basically, the entire scene looks like the worst date ever and like an obvious metaphor for their marriage: Brady has boyish fun in his own kayak while Paulie and Rosemary crash into things, are swept along furiously by an unruly current, and eventually attack each other with their paddles. Back at camp, Paulie and Rosemary change into dry clothes while Brady shivers in his wet ones because he didn’t have enough foresight (or a spare wife) to pack his. The women barely speak to each other while Brady repeatedly congratulates himself on his super-smart double date idea.

Brady wakes up the next morning in Paulie’s bed and is ready to celebrate Father’s Day. The entire family gathers for pool time, barbequing, and games. The kids give Brady a giant card with all of their names in the leaves of a tree. Flashback! We are shown a shot of Brady’s enormous shoulder tattoo, also an enormous tree, which represents his family as well. (He has a tattoo?!?) Karlie makes her pregnancy announcement and Nonie tries to be happy for her, but laments the fact that she herself is not pregnant. Rhonda seems genuinely happy for Karlie, but hilariously comments that she’s not totally OK with being married to a grandpa. Heh. I like Rhonda.

TELL US – DOUBLE DATES: DISASTROUS IDEA?

Recap Author: Erin M.

Photos by TLC

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