I still don’t know what the hell happened on Real Housewives Of New York! One minute Bethenny Frankel was crying, the next she was hugging, the next she was building flimsy walls, the next she was eviscerating, the next she was arguing, the next she was conducting a high-powered business summit, the next she was running away, then she was apologizing. Dare I say – with all her emotional turmoil – she was acting like Kelly from Scary Island. I feel like everyone needs an instruction manual for how to operate Bethenny.
Back in the Berkshires at Dorinda Medley‘s birthday dinner, Bethenny is having a sobbing meltdown because Heather Thomson tried to smother her with a meatball like some sort of depraved Upper East Side momogul version of Aqua-Teen Hunger Force. Get the memo, Heather: Bethenny doesn’t eat! Bethenny is allergic to fish – and, also Xanax!
Then Bethenny is running around to Heather’s side of the table, eyes shining with tears (or maybe it was Skinnygirl Sparklers; who knows) hugging Heather and apologizing for the walls she’s has because everyone is trying to put her in a Skinnygirl box. “I’m over myself!” Bethenny snaps. “I just don’t want attention!” Except for the times I’ve talked to the media and put myself on reality shows!
Last week Dorinda took the group to her Berkshires home, where it was anything but peaceful and relaxing. With all the non-stop drama, Dorinda nearly lost it. Good thing she had copious amounts of champagne!
“Of course, I knew what I might be getting myself into by inviting the girls over for a birthday dinner. This weekend was going to be a juggling act: relaxation meets possible obliteration,” Dorinda admits. “I mean, after my first birthday dinner at Petrossian, where I had a front-row seat to my own crucifixion, I was almost relieved to know my next potential slow death would happen on my own turf.”
Andy Cohen’seternal love for Real Housewives of New York’s prodigal daughter, Bethenny Frankel, is well known. What has come under scrutiny of late, though, is just how much his affinity for the Skinnygirl mogul may influence how she appears – or how she wants to appear – on RHONY. According to Page Six, some RHONY castmates have been complaining that Bethenny may have “editorial approval” over episodes before they air, an allegation which Andy denies.
At the recent W Hotels Turn It Up for Change party, Andy told Page Six that Bethenny truly has “no warning” before episodes air, even when she looks “like a beast.” When asked directly what kind of “heads up” Bethenny may get before episodes are released, Andy answered, “She has none,” adding, “As a matter of fact, she gets the episode when everyone else does.” To hammer the point home, Andy further explained, “We send the ‘Housewives’ the episodes the week before. She has absolutely no say.”
It’s that time of the the week again, the time when we sit back and relax with the Real Housewives of New York epic fantasy novel that is Sonja Morgan’sBravo blog. But, alas! This week’s intern post is a bit more lucid than normal, so perhaps that psycho-pharmacologist has finally balanced Lady Morgan’s VitaMeataVegamin cocktail a bit better these days? Or maybe the Swami priestess is influencing this new, more rational perspective? In any case – light your abundance candles, people, because we’re diving in!
“You’ve got to love how a dinner party at which two girls cried is considered tame for my group of friends,” begins Sonja. Ha! Expressing her love for Dorinda Medley’s house, hostessing skills, and her expert handling of the den of vipers she invited for the weekend, Sonja comments, “Overall Dorinda was an amazing hostess to all of us crazy ladies, and I am so grateful to her for extending her warmth and hospitality by sharing her birthday with us nuts.” She also knows that Dorinda must have achieved all of her happiness through watching The Secret on repeat whilst lying around in a dirty robe, just like Sonja does! “I loved the story Dorinda shared about wanting to own that beautiful house. Positivity, visualization, and tenacity are the ultimate keys to success. I have learned that through my decades of hard work and experience, and it has really served me well. Everything I have dreamed has come true. Furthermore, I bring the fun, not the drama,” says Sonja.
Jill Zarin is excellent at acting horrible and being a terror, so why not leverage those skills into acting in horror films?! Jill landed role in a new Eric Red directed horror film which co-stars Kelly Rutherford and Rob Morrow.
Kristen Taekman went to the Berkshires expecting to have a peaceful weekend in beautiful surroundings, but instead she found herself in the midst of Dorinda Medley‘s rage! You guys, Kristen wasn’t trying to entice John at World Bar – she was just trying to dance and have fun – she didn’t deserve to be Frotteured!
Giving her side of the story over the drama with Dorinda’s boyfriend John, and Bethenny Frankel‘s ice princess routine, the Real Housewives Of New York star is frankly shocked that everything escalated to such heights! Well, they were in the mountains…
For Kristen it’s all Ramona Singer‘s fault that she got berated by Dorinda. “Ramona is such a sh– stirrer!” Kristen complains. “Ramona is constantly in the middle of it all. She starts it and passes it off to everyone else. Makes me nuts! So I was dumb for telling Dorinda to her face as opposed to talking behind her back? HELLO!”
Luann de Lessepsthinks Heather Thomson needs to be cool, not all uncool. In this week’s Bravo blog, the Real Housewives of New York’s resident Countess reviews the etiquette of Googling people’s dates, wearing elbow-length gloves to dinner, and offering meatballs to psychologically unstable dinner companions. Luann begins by praising Dorinda Medley’s beautiful home, and the sweet story of her father that went along with it. “The Berkshires in the winter is gorgeous, and Dorinda’s home is as vibrant as her personality,” she says, “I took a car from New York with Ramona [Singer], and I have to admit, it wasn’t all that bad! We’ve been through so much together that when we have a tiff, it’s more of a fender bender than a 95-car pileup. Boy, have things changed!”
Luann questions whether Ramona is ready to close the Mario chapter also, reflecting that “I think Ramona enjoys her business partner’s company and that is why she invited him to Dorinda’s party, yet I don’t feel like she’s completely moved on from Mario–they aren’t even divorced yet. They’ve been married for so long that it’s going to take time before she feels comfortable in the dating scene.” Next, Luann questions Kristen Taekman’s sanity in bringing up John’s handsy behavior to Dorinda. (Doesn’t she know that kind of smack talk is done firmly behind our friend’s back? What are we here, animals!?) Luann asks, “Is Kristen nuts bringing up how she feels about John with Dorinda? You can see in the flashback video that Kristen was getting her groove on with John and didn’t seem to mind grinding on the dance floor in front of the girls and her husband. Her explanation that shimmying in the back isn’t the same as the front seems a little hypocritical to me. John makes Dorinda happy, and she’s opened up her heart to him, so her friends need to accept John for who he is…a kind, sometimes slightly inappropriate man who should heed Dorinda’s warning that these girls are looking to throw him under the bus.”
Game, set, match. Or…dinner, meatball, cry? In her Bravo blog, Heather Thomson responds to her continuous Clash of the Titans epic brawl with Bethenny Frankel on this season’s Real Housewives of New York. Heather begins by giving us all a history lesson on the Berkshires, of which she is honorary Second Assistant to the Co-President of the Volunteer Historical Preservation Association. Or she just owns a summer house there. Anyway she explains, “Dorinda [Medley’s] house is special, and I love the history of it for her with her father. I’ve met him, and he himself is special. There is so much history in the Berkshires, and the architectural history has always fascinated me. During America’s Gilded Age (1865-1901) our country saw unprecedented economic growth and prosperity, allowing some of the nation’s wealthiest families to construct these massive estates.” Heather goes on to describe several estates (complete with photo evidence!) that she “drives by” all of the time. Are you riveted yet? Me neither.
Moving on to other Berkshire hot spots, Heather tells us, “Speaking of historical spots in the Berkshires, the Red Lion Inn (built in 1773), is where my husband and I got engaged!” adding, “Normally dinner at the Red Lion is special, but immediately the group started discussing Bethenny and all the usual topics…custody arrangements, her childhood, and opinions on her friendships and her integration into the group, or lack thereof, and the mood changed. It’s clear I was getting frustrated with the context of the conversation, and I can admit to being tough and having an irreverence for bullsh–, but I was not attempting to ‘compare’ people’s struggles.” Defending her comment of losing her nanny of 9 years as being comparable to surviving an abusive childhood, Heather retorts, ” I was not comparing one particular problem with another (but thanks for the tip, Countess). My point was that everyone has different issues, and at any given time they can be less or they can be more…I am not a judgmental person and certainly not unsympathetic to people’s challenges, misfortunes, mishaps, or sh–ty deals. That is for damn sure. Life has tough breaks, and unfortunately some of us have it worse than others, and some better, but circumstances can change in the blink of an eye… Everyone is entitled to a bad day, a good cry, and the absolute right to feel sorry for ourselves. And, we all are also entitled to a good hug, a good friend, a good turn of events and some good luck! I like to stay of the mind-set that life is good, and mostly, it is what you make of it.”