Last night’s episode of Vanderpump Rules reminded me of two classic movies that perfectly apply: Fatal Attraction and Dazed and Confused.
Let’s start by examining the ulterior motives of Stassi “Free Ride” Schroeder. Stassi, quit SUR, moved away, started dressing the Jr. League vice president, and thinks that makes her a grownup. Sadly, she’s still loitering outside the gates of SUR, leaning against the bar with a pinot grigio, sighing, “This is what I love about these SUR bitches, I get more mature, but they just stay the same.” You know who I’m referencing!
Stassi needs a job - because she is bored of free riding her friends TV show, spending daddy’s money, and wearing that real live adult facade. Maturity is hard – especially when you really, really, really yearn to be back at SUR, causing drama, and bitchwhipping these pathetic losers into shape like Red Heather (since we’re going with old movie references! There’s pate, and croquet! And Kristen Doute is totally going to bomb the bleachersAriana’s bar).
2014 was booming with new reality shows. Some were good, some were awful and some were just plain ‘wtf’! Our next categories for the First Annual Reality Tea Readers’ Choice Awards are Best New Reality Show of 2014 and Worst New Reality Show of 2014.
We have included a small sampling of the new shows of 2014 in the polls below, so to refresh your memory for other possible write-in votes, here are a few of the new shows that debuted this year:
Ladies of London, Euros of Hollywood, Jersey Belle, Blood Sweat and Heels, The Singles Project, Million Dollar Listing Miami, Prison Wives Club, Extreme Guide to Parenting, Untying the Knot, Candidly Nicole, K Michelle My Life and so many more!
If you missed earlier polls or want to find future polls, you can bookmark this category and find them all here – Readers’ Choice Awards. The polls will end 7 days after it publishes on the site, so get your votes in!
So last night was the return of Love & Hip Hop. Some old favorites returned (along with some of the more unsavory characters) along with a new crew. Joe Budden is gone (at least for now). I’m not sure how I feel about this! I am happy that Mendeecees is out on bail, and Yandy Smith is over the moon to have her fiance back in the free world. Speaking of couples, Erica Mena and Cyn are back together and sharing Chipotle (at least for now). Erica’s even made her breakfast in bed in hopes of convincing her to co-habitate. Cyn is still a bit jealous over Erica’s recent on-air kiss with Lil’ Bow Wow…little does she know! Peter Gunz and Amina Buddafly are back together and expecting a baby girl. Amina is still blinded by love and stupidity for still being with this jack leg. At the ultrasound he mistakes the baby’s leg for a “giant penis” just like his. Good gracious. Amina questions Peter’s recent outings with his sons…he drops his son off at school and then doesn’t return until late at night. #redflag
We meet Diamond Strawberry, and she’s an aspiring model. Oh, and she’s also the daughter of famed baseball player Darryl Strawberry. Diamond wants to pursue her dreams in New York (how else is she going to be on this franchise), but her Los Angeles based family is less than supportive. It’s a sudden and drastic move (per Diamond), but she’s hoping it will bring her closer to her music producer boyfriend Cisco. Cut to Cisco who is in town to wine and dine Diamond and talking about his hustle and his connections. The couple complains about how difficult their long distance relationship is, and Diamond is happy to move to New York after dating for two years. Wait what? Cisco likes the status quo. Sure, Diamond is his one and only…when he’s with her in L.A., but he’s enlisted a “don’t ask, don’t tell” clause in their relationship, and he needs Diamond to abide…and stay on the West Coast.
Jax Taylor started rumors about his friend Tom Schwartz cheating on his girlfriend, but now he’s annoyed that no one understands he was trying to help. He just wants Tom 2 to be happy, and to be free, and single and he knows that poor Tom 2 gets anxiety and doesn’t have the manly parts to breakup with Katie Maloney on his own!
But Jax has another reason for spilling rumors – he’s totally tired of being the only person on Vanderpump Rules called out for cheating. You guys, he’s not the only villain on this show and it’s high time we all know the truth. When the word “truth” is used in the same sentence as Jax’s name, does some thing explode out there in the universe that none of us can see?
“It’s so great that finally other people are cheating. It’s not just me anymore! I’m always this villain — but everything that I’ve done, they’ve all done,” Jax gloats.
Yolanda took to her blog to share her thoughts – then and now – about Bella. “Sharing this personal parenting story with you is a very sensitive subject,” she said, “but I felt it was important for you to hear it from me.”
“When my phone rang and I heard David’s voice, I knew in my gut something was really wrong,” Yolanda recalled. “My adrenaline started rushing through my body, and the greatest panic attack of my life set in, like a train ran over my heart. ‘DUI….’, ‘drinking and driving,…’, OMG, what if she had hurt someone?! What if she had crashed and gotten killed?! My ‘what if’ button went from zero to ten in a split second, because my greatest fear is to lose any of my children in a car accident the way I lost my father when I was only seven years old.”
If you cannot get enough of Kate Gosselin‘s monotone and completely devoid of emotion voice narrating the latest happenings in her life, then you are in luck because Kate Plus 8 returns soon. Why, TLC?! WHY?!?
Like always, the show focuses on Kate and her eight kids, Mady, Cara, Leah, Alexis, Aaden, Hannah, Collin, and Joel, on fun trips and wacky adventures. Only … this is Kate we’re talking about … so erase the fun and the wacky. On the trailer, Kate and the kids travel to Maine, celebrate the twins 14th birthday, smash pumpkins for Halloween, and kick off a home renovation. Also, the best part, Mady and Cara imitate Kate in all her uptight glory. See the Kate Plus 8 trailer below. The new episodes kick off January 13 on TLC.
When people have money to throw away, why don’t they throw it at those in need and not at those already swimming in it? Also, what is the term for a person who gets paid to go on dates? Kim Kardashian hasn’t even been married to Kanye West for a year, and she’s already considering stepping out with another man…if the price is right.
Apparently a Saudi Arabian prince would like an evening out on the town with Kim, and you know Kris Jenner isn’t going to let her turn down his advances…or his cash. You won’t believe how much he’s offering her!