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Oh Teen Mom 2, whatever are we going to do without you?  Last night we bid a ninety minute farewell to Leah Messer Sims Calvert, Jenelle Evans, Kailyn Lowry, and Chelsea Houska, and MTV has yet to confirm whether they'll be back for more (please, no).  While we'll be able to keep up with Jenelle thanks to her constant arrests and rehab stints, how will keep tabs on our other favorite whiny and entitled reality stars?  What will become of Corey's camo hat?  Will Kieffer Delp be successful in his pipe selling endeavors?  So many unanswered questions–I can't bear the thought of it…

Of course, I jest.  Last night, I cried when Corey cried, and I felt such pain for Barbara as she struggled with losing her daughter to heroin.  I'm excited that Chelsea seems to be maturing–here's hoping she keeps up the good work.  These girls need to stay out of the limelight, and I really need for Jenelle to get her life in order before she ends up dead.  I can't imagine the only memories that Jace has of his mom being the same we've seen on the series.

The episode begins as Leah and Jeremy discuss Ali's big doctor's appointment over date night.  Jeremy has taken time off from work so he can be with his wife as she deals with the stress of facing Ali's potential diagnosis.

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Hey Jenelle Evans, if you scream it loud enough, someone may believe you!  The Teen Mom 2 star is trying to convince anyone who will listen that she is clueless (at least she's not lying about that part!) about how heroin got into her house.

You may recall that the reality star was arrested on Tuesday for possession of heroin and Percocet…oh, and assault.  I've come to the conclusion that the authorities in North Carolina have a box labeled "and assault" that they are trained to check whenever a Jenelle arrest occurs.  I swear, this chick could be collared for jay walking and an assault would be involved…as she'd probably threaten to push other pedestrians into oncoming traffic.  Geez.

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24th Annual GLAAD Media Awards

While it was definitely time for MTV's Jersey Shore to go gently into that good night, that didn't mean the show's stars planned to go with it!  Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi and Jenni "JWoww" Farley scored their own spin-off while the series was still going strong, and DJ Pauly D Delvecchio did a (very) brief stint on his own series The Pauly D Project.

Now, Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino is getting into the mix.  Oh Lord, no.  I'd rather watch Rawn and Sam throw caboodles and sausages at one another for thirty minutes a week than put up with more of Mike's ab flashing.  At least my boy Vinny Guadagnino will have The Show with Vinny to offset his friend's oiliness.  We've got a Situation here!

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This week on Teen Mom 2, Kailyn Lowry and Jo Rivera begin their court-appointed co-parenting therapy, Leah Calvert and Corey Simms bring Ali to a muscle specialist​, Chelsea Houska's Aubree turns three years old, and Jenelle Evans self-medicates with illegal drugs after becoming depressed.

It's court day for Jenelle and Gary Head (or, as we like to call it, Tuesday), but she has high hopes for the day. Gary admitted to getting physical with Jenelle, so her lawyer, Dustin Sullivan, will charge Gary with assault and request for Jenelle's charges to be dropped. Kieffer Delp nonchalantly asks Jenelle if there's any chance she'll go to jail. It's all good, Jenelle says, because she totally stopped getting high two weeks ago. Kieffer is nervous. Not because he cares about Jenelle, mind you, but  because he needs a place to make his pot pipes.

One hour later, Dustin congratulates Jenelle on another good day in court, revealing that all charges against her have been dropped. Seriously?! Jenelle has more lives than the entire cast of CATS. One thing is for sure, if I ever get in trouble with the law, I'm calling Dustin the Judge Whisperer. 

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Earlier this month, MTV ceased production and canceled BUCKWILD following Shain Gandee's sudden death. Despite the show's decent ratings, MTV concluded, "Given Shain's tragic passing and essential presence on the show, we felt it was not appropriate to continue without him." 

BUCKWILD producer J.P. Williams did not take kindly to the news, bashing the network for its teen pregnancy shows, and vowed to acquire the rights to continue the show with another network. According to Williams, his negotiations with MTV came to an abrupt end on Friday, and he did not win. Williams went on to accuse MTV of hypocrisy. 

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Oh girls of Teen Mom 2, what are we going to do with you?  Last night, Leah Messer Sims Calvert walked down the aisle for a second time in her short life, and Jenelle Evans caused a scene at Jace's third birthday party.  Anyone want to chip in for a Mom-of-theYear trophy with me?  Chelsea Houska celebrated her twenty-first birthday, and Kailyn Lowry got engaged to Javi and Jo let out a sigh of relief that she was now someone else's problem.  Good times, right?

The episode starts with Leah cooking breakfast with her dad, and we learn that she hasn't seen him since she was thirteen.  She tells him what a great provider Jeremy is, and he's happy to be back in his daughter's life.  I wish he'd turn his NASCAR ballcap around so I could see who his favorite driver is.  #rubbinisracin'

Chelsea is moving yet again (what is this…like the fourth time this season alone?), and she takes Aubree to her mom's after daycare.  She's planning for her twenty-first birthday, and her mom offers to watch Aubree so she can celebrate.  Aubree's birthday is not long after Chelsea's, and Chelsea's mom asks if A-D-A-M will be attending her party.  Chelsea turns on the whine and says she doesn't want to talk about him under any circumstances.  Her mom praises her maturity. 

Back with Kieffer, Jenelle is stressed out because her roommate is moving out, and she's short on cash from her boyfriend's mooching ways because her Internet job isn't paying as much as she'd hoped.  She heads to her mom's house to discuss Jace's upcoming third birthday.  Wait, my bad…she really just wants to complain to Barbara about her roommate and collect her mail.  She reveals to her mom that she's dropped out of school due to the stress from her legal troubles with Gary and her boob job…both good reasons.  Jenelle can barely keep her eyes open as she tells her mom that Kieffer is moving in with her.  Barbara tells her daughter that she's planned Jace's party for the following day at a local tumbling Jim.  Jenelle is upset that she didn't get more time to invite her friends, but she warns her mom she will be bringing Kieffer.

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So, the producer of BUCKWILD isn't going to give up without a fight, is he?  After the tragic death of Shain Gandee, MTV pulled the plug on filming the second season.  Producer J.P. Williams wasn't happy with network's decision, and his comments about Teen Mom didn't sit well with Jenelle Evans since she's such a pillar of the responsibility. 

J.P. Williams is determined that this show has the recipe for success, regardless of what crazy kids they get to star in it.  He doesn't need West Virginia, and he certainly doesn't need MTV.  BUCKWILD 2.0 will happen, y'all–especially if J.P. Williams has anything to say about it!

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Sometimes it's still hard for me to believe that the fist-pumping, falling down drunk, slipper-wearing, foul mouthed teeny orange star of MTV's Jersey Shore became a much more grounded, rascal riding mom during the course of the hit show.  Who knew that Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi could make such a 180 in life? 

Now, Snooki is engaged to Jionni LaValle and proud mom to precious baby Lorenzo.  She's focused on a healthier lifestyle and wants to be a positive role model for her son.  Don't get me wrong, she's still the opinionated meatball who brought havoc to Seaside Heights, but Snooki has definitely grown up a lot…even if while she was growing, her ta-tas were deflating.  No worries, that's what plastic surgery is for, right?

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