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I guess you're not technically an MTV reality star if you don't start getting caught for stupid stuff the second you get a taste of fame.  Just ask the girls of Teen Mom…am I right?  Now, the ridiculous kids of Buckwild are vying for their spot among the dumbest of the dumb. 

First Salwa Amin was arrested last week for possession of drug with intent to distribute, and now her co-star Michael Burford is getting his own mugshot after being busted for DUI.  Congratulations, idiot.

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It's that special time of the season we've been waiting on for what seems like eons…the season finale of Teen Mom 2.  Last night, the girls and their children/parents/boyfriends/users sat down for a two hour chit chat with MTV's resident "therapist" Dr. Drew Pinsky.  Wait…what's that you say?  It wasn't the season finale?  Mid-season finale?  What the–?  I have never heard of such a thing.  You know what this means, right?

Let me break it down for you.  Remember how last week everything wrapped up ever so nicely in the calmest ninety minutes in the show's history?  Jenelle Evans and mom Barbara seemed to be mending their relationship.  Leah Messer Simms Calvert Insert Next Husband's Name Here realized she needed to move on from Corey now that she's pregnant with her new fiance's baby.  Kailyn Lowry began a new romance and was working to co-parent with Jo, and Chelsea Houska finally passed her GED.  Things were in a good place.  

Of course, leave it to MTV to make sure the true finale will be total chaos.  Next week the insanity of broken relationships, drug abuse, and violence spirals out of control when we are treated to the midseason premiere.  I can't keep up, so let's just focus on last night's drama, shall we?  Take it away, Dr. Drew

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So, we are in the midst of what may be the longest stint of Teen Mom 2 in the history of the world.  Last night's "mid-season finale" was even ninety minutes long…because it takes a long time to bid farewell to Jenelle Evans, Leah Messer Calvert, Chelsea Houska, and Kailyn Lowry.  Not that they will be gone for long…we'll be treated to a two-hour reunion special next Monday, and then another twelve episode arc starts the week afterwards.  That's when the true crazy is going to begin!

Last night's episode begins with a phone call from JeremyLeah, shocked she got pregnant so quickly (must I remind her of her first date with Corey?), has yet to tell him the good news.  Jeremy is also in disbelief that it happened so fast, but he's nervous and excited.  Leah commends Jeremy on waiting until he was the ripe old age of twenty-three to have a child…not sixteen like she was.

Chelsea is taking Aubree to check out day cares in the event she passes her GED and gets to start "hair school."  Man, she's even whiny when questioning the day care instructor!  The director calms her fears regarding leaving Aubree for the first time and stresses the need for Aubree to socialize at this age.  Chelsea smacks her gum in agreement.

Kailyn is prepping for Isaac's second birthday and spending a lot of time with Javi.  Why are guys drawn to her blunt sarcasm?  Javi wonders if he'll ever get out of the friend zone.  Kailyn assures him that being invited to Isaac's party is a good sign.  Meanwhile, Jo and his new girlfriend are discussing how well Jo and Kailyn have been co-parenting lately.  They are, however, having separate parties for their son.  Jo wants Kailyn to meet his girlfriend, and his girlfriend thinks that Kailyn would want to know who is hanging around her son.  She offers to write Kailyn a letter to break the ice. 

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Teen Mom 2 star Leah (Messer) Calvert, 20, reportedly gave birth to baby number three early this morning. This is Leah's first child with husband Jeremy Calvert, 24.

Leah gave birth in the early hours of this morning to a beautiful baby girl," a close family friend told In Touch. "Mother and baby are happy and healthy. Leah went into labor late last night, and the baby was born this morning.
 
Leah had twins Ali and Aleeah with her first husband, Corey Simms, in 2009.
 
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Is it just me, or do these girls get dumber the longer this season of Teen Mom 2 continues?  It's like, they do something stupid, and I'm convinced that they can't top their own stupidity, and then BAM!  The next episode happens, and they've proven me wrong.  Case in point…on last night's episode, Leah Messer Calvert took out her IUD because she wants her kids to be close in age.  Pay no attention to the fact that at this point she's only known Jeremy for two months.  Jenelle Evans admits she slept with her best friend's boyfriend around the time she got pregnant, so she doesn't know for certain who Jace's father is.  Chelsea Houska was more concerned about Adam's twenty-first birthday than studying for her GED, and Kailyn Lowry brought yet another dude into Isaac's life.  I can't wait to see what they have in store for us next week!

After the twins' birthday party, Leah drops off the twins with Corey.  He's lamenting (well, not really…he's be lamenting if he knew what it meant) about what to get the girls for their birthday since they already have every toy under the sun.  Leah tells him she got them a Barbie jeep before riding off into the sunset for a romantic getaway with Jeremy.  They head up to a cabin in the mountains, and Leah is blown away by the coziness of it all.  Plus, there's a hot tub!  Jeremy sneakily hides what I'm assuming is an engagement ring in a vase in the den.  I'm just glad these crazy kids are taking it slow.

Jo has Isaac for the weekend, and Kailyn has a date with Javi.  I'm getting that Kailyn's favorite restaurant is a diner.  Javi is studying criminal justice in school, and he wants to be a cop.  They flirt, eat, and cut to the chase as far as dating, Isaac, and Jo are concerned.  Seriously, what is up with these girls throwing themselves into relationships?  It's a breakfast date, not an interview for a spouse.

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It looks as if MTV's Teen Mom money has finally run dry for Gary Shirley.  I'll be honest…it took a little longer than I thought it would!  Amber Portwood's ex is being evicted from his home.

While Amber is serving a five year sentence in the slammer, Gary has been raising the pair's four-year-old daughter Leah in a 1,500 square foot house in Indiana.  Unfortunately for Gary, he's been forgetting one tiny detail…rent!  If he's short on cash, perhaps he should start wearing some tacky clothing line again, so the company will pay him to stop wearing it.  Hey, it's worked before!

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We are now officially ten episodes into this season of Teen Mom 2, and I worry that there is no end in sight.  All of the girls seem to be mirroring each other's behavior.  Jenelle Evans moves, then Leah Messer moves.  Jenelle drops out of school, Leah drops out of school.  Kailyn Lowry gets a new place, Chelsea Houska wants a fenced-in backyard.  I guess I should be glad that they are all pretty interchangeable, right? 

Kailyn has decided against moving to Texas to be fair to Jo.  He is excited to hear that she plans to stay in Pennsylvania.  She informs him that when her lease is up, she plans to look for another home about twenty minutes away.  Does Jo minds driving twenty minutes back and forth to see his son?  Um, I think Jo is glad that he doesn't have to travel back and forth to Texas!  While Jo has Isaac, Kailyn decides to go bowling with Gigi and some of her friends.  Kailyn is paired up with Gigi's friend Javi, and she thinks he's really cute…cute enough to marry?

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Shain Gandee is most definitely the breakout star of BUCKWILDMTV describes Shain as "a trash collector … and quite possibly inebriated at any given moment, refers to himself as Gandee Candy, and every time he speaks, you need subtitles to understand him. Needless to say, he's amazing." 

Yes, Shain is amazing in a tire rollin', muddin' kind of way, but apparently he's no longer a trash collector. Rumor has it that Shain lost his sanitation job well before BUCKWILD began filming last spring. According to the Charleston Daily Mail, Shain was let go in November 2011 for "violating the personnel policy."

Color me confused because Shain is seen throwing trash bags into a South Charleston trash truck on the BUCKWILD series premiere. Why the lie?

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