The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills - Season 5

I’ll be honest, I don’t know what to think about ol’ Kyle “Splits” Richards on this new season of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. She is clearly trying to come back from ganging up on Lisa Vanderpump in hopes of becoming a fan favorite, but sometimes she seems very disingenuous…and then sometimes, I find myself liking her. It’s at these times that I swill more pinot, rock in the corner and cry. 

She’s certainly panning to the viewers, hoping to be more likable, and it’s especially evident in this week’s Bravo blog where she dishes on mother/daughter bonding, fun times with friends, and of course, that precocious Portia (seriously, Mauricio, take me shopping!). Kyle begins, “Watching Lisa [Rinna] getting ready for her birthday makes me smile. Her daughter giving her tips is very familiar to me. My girls hang out in my room while I get ready and give me style advice. When I don’t listen and they question why, I have to explain that while I love their advice, I’m not 14 years old, and I have to fine tune the advice to make it age appropriate. They still don’t get the ‘pointy witch shoes’ that are so popular amongst my friends and me. I love seeing Gigi’s career take off. I know how excited and proud Yolanda [Foster] is. Gigi is such a young girl to have such a busy life. She has a good head on her shoulders, due to her parents’ love and guidance. Bella is another beauty who I have no doubt will have her own exciting career. At this point, Yolanda and I are counting down the days until Bella and Alexia leave for college. A bittersweet time.”


Moving on to what looked like a very fun and drama free night on the town, Kyle writes, “Lisa R.’s birthday was a fun night at PUMP. I love dinners where we all sit around and share stories. I shared the story of how I met Mauricio and was engaged at the time. I was having doubts about getting married and told my fiancé at the time. I decided to not send out the invitations, which didn’t go over well. I didn’t want to make a mistake and knew in my heart I would be. When I met Mauricio, there was an immediate attraction. Like nobody else was in the room. After I told him I was engaged that night, I didn’t see him again until six months later when I ran into him at a club. I had broken up with my fiancé by that point, and we picked up where we left off six months earlier. We have been together ever since.” Isn’t that just peachy?

As to that shopping spree (seriously, why was the six-year-old wearing a crop top?), Kyle defends her daughter’s behavior (she shouldn’t have to, in my opinion, a six-year-old will be a six-year-old) and addresses Mauricio’s need to spoil her rotten. Kyle admits,, “Taking the girls shopping is a fun daddy/daughter time for Mauricio. Portia, like most kids, will try to test us at times. She has her moments where I have to keep her in check. I am always the disciplinarian with our kids. She’s at that age where she likes to see how far she can push us and what she can get away with. I’ve seen it with all our girls around this age, and it can be challenging. Mauricio usually makes it more challenging. I will say no while he says yes. I am constantly asking him to not undermine me. It’s unavoidable that these moments will happen with little ones, but how it’s handled is very important. You have to nip it in the bud.” She makes a good point! (chug, rock, cry). 

Of the bittersweet bridal time, Kyle shares, “My niece Brooke getting married is an exciting time for our family. She’s the first of our kids to be walking down the aisle. And Kim [Richards] will be the first Mother of the Bride. Looking for dresses was fun with all my sisters and a bunch of our kids in tow. Our children (there are 12 between us) are extremely close. More like siblings than cousins. Everyone knows everything that’s going on with each other at any given time, so it seemed appropriate that we would all weigh in on which was the best dress for Brooke,” adding, “I knew that day Kim and Brooke were to be getting news about Monty’s health. My heart broke for Kim and Brooke. Monty has always remained close with our family, and to see what he is going through is heartbreaking. This should be the happiest time of Brooke’s life, and I know she is constantly worried about her father.” 

She continues, “Eileen Davidson is finally here! Loved the flashback of Eileen and Lisa R. Too funny. I think you will enjoy getting to know both Lisa and Eileen.” Oh, Splits. I already know them…well. You don’t watch Days of our Lives for twenty plus years (man it was so good in the late 80’s. Remember the Salem slasher? Frankie and Jennifer? Ahh…), and not have a soft spot for Kristen DiMera/John Black and the feisty Billie! Yes, I know, I clearly have a television addiction problem.

Kyle concludes, “Brandi [Glanville] invited me to go on a hike with her. At this point we are becoming friends. Not close, but at least getting to know each other. When Brandi said she was going to call Lisa V. right then and there, I didn’t think it would go over well . Plus, I didn’t think she was going about it the right way, and I didn’t want to be there when she called her. However, she was set on calling, so I decided to just stay quiet. When her battery died, I hesitated to offer my phone. Lisa V. and I had just recently had our lunch and were working on our friendship. I didn’t want to be a part of Lisa V.’s and Brandi’s issues. However, I thought Lisa would think Brandi hung up on her, and I knew that would be another setback for them. Lisa isn’t going to forgive Brandi overnight. And an invite to her housewarming isn’t the answer.”

Sounds like someone is trying to distance themselves from Ms. Glanville and get back in Vanderfabulous’ good graces, doesn’t it? 


[Photo Credit: Bravo]

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