After this week’s exhausting installment of Real Housewives of New York, there may be nary a NY housewife left who is willing to give Sonja Morgan one more inch…or one more drink. After Sonja’s Rain-Man inspired “I’m a Very Good PR Person” rambling, among other drunken rants that lasted nearly 24 annoying hours on their Atlantic City trip, Luann de Lesseps says in her recent Bravo blog that she is done, done, done trying to reason with Lady Morgan.
Beginning with the limo ride Luann thankfully missed, she says, “I’ve never been happier to skip a limo ride than I was when the girls left to do AC! What was up with Lady Morgan leaving the girls singing (bitching) in the rain until she was ready to leave? Why couldn’t one of her multiple assistants make them a cup of tea while they waited? I wonder sometimes if Sonja is just clueless or self-absorbed (or both).” Bethenny Frankel’s roadside urination (hey, we’ve all been there, amiright?!) was also something the Countess is happy to have missed: “This is not the first time we’ve seen Bethenny pee on television, but hopefully it’s our last. Incontinent women, baby wipes, and va-jjs are just the beginning of what you are going to see in Atlantic City. Wasn’t there a rest stop along the way?”
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Commenting on Heather Thomson’s hypocrisy on bending rules about being late, Luann says, “Heather was late for dinner that night–no question–and I find her denial of this fact confusing, because just hours earlier, she went ballistic on Bethenny for running behind schedule.” Moving on to the real subject at hand – Sonja’s future bag lady behavior – Luann starts by explaining, “Sonja started drinking before dinner (always a risky proposition), and she was tipsy by the time we left the suite to go to Izakaya. Sonja’s name-dropping JohnJohn/Gstaad/updo/Madonna/Gstaad/updo doesn’t just irritate Bethenny but annoys all of us, and her attempts to move Sonja on to another topic were futile. Is Sonja repeating herself, or as those in PR say, ‘staying on message’?” The countess wisely concludes: “You can’t reason with Sonja when she’s drinking, so I don’t even try.”
Going off message to touch on Carole Radziwill’s “dig” at her for being from Connecticut (since when is that a “dig?”), Luann returns to the topic of Sonja. And Sonja’s snatch. Which Luann was in charge of protecting. “I guess I’ve become the snatch guard for Sonja…OMG, keep your legs together woman. Unfortunately, my hands were not large enough to keep the crowd from getting an eyeful. When Sonja’s two sheets to the wind, at some point she’s going to try to make out with you–it happens every time. I’m used to it, though, and since I’m so much taller than her, half the time she misses my face.” Post-make-out-dodging, Luann claims she was relieved Bethenny, followed by poor Dorinda Medley, took hot-mess Sonja off their hands for the rest of the night: “Bethenny finally had enough and left us to look after Sonja. Thank goodness Dorinda took a turn taking care of her. As Heather mentioned earlier, we’ve all had a shot at keeping her safe. After we pulled Sonja from the dance floor, and we knew she was ensconced in her room, the rest of us partied into the night.”
At breakfast the next morning, Luann mused, “OK, so how does Sonja recover so quickly? It’s barometric pressure, not baromic pressure, and as far as I know, this doesn’t affect whether or not you get wasted. Rain or shine, when Sonja has too much to drink, we end up taking care of her like any friend would do.” Ha! Luann adds that “Bethenny’s heartfelt intervention fell on deaf ears, and no matter how many compliments she gives Sonja to soften the impact, Sonja stays on message that she’s fine and doesn’t need any help. While I’m not a mental health professional (but I could be after seven seasons on this show), I agree that Sonja could benefit from counseling, because she seems stuck in the past. Her marriage ended a long time ago, but she seems to feel the pain of her breakup like it happened yesterday. Maybe like Bethenny said, every day is like Groundhog Day for Sonja, but I hope that she pulls herself together soon.”
Ending with more questions than answers, Luann posits, “Will Sonja cut down her drinking? Will Bethenny ever get to relax on this trip? And will Kristen [Taekman] ever match her shoes…? This and more, from the Borgata to you, see you next week. Be there and be cool!” Well, whether she is actually writing her tweets or blogs this season, who cares, really? Luann has at least become more interesting to watch. And RHONY needs as much of that as they can get this season!
TELL US: DO YOU THINK LUANN IS REALLY ‘DONE’ WITH SONJA MORGAN? WILL BETHENNY’S INTERVENTION WORK?
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