If the Below Deck Sailing Yacht crew wasn’t on their A-game in last week’s episode, Captain Glenn Shephard will be disappointed to know the scrambling carries over into this week. Maybe it’s residual from the crash a few episodes back. Or maybe it’s the gaggle of ladies currently on board. But something has definitely put the crew on the wrong foot and nearly everyone seems to be underperforming. That being said, the worst offender continues to be Natasha De Bourg, who keeps everyone waiting as she throws together lunch at the very last second for the guests’ beach picnic. I mean, she literally has the audacity to snap at Captain Glenn when he asks her to hurry. Girl, you’re the one not doing your job. Get a grip.
Even worse, Natasha‘s constant incompetence is making everyone else look bad. Particularly the interior. Which means the mess particularly falls on Daisy Kelliher‘s shoulders. And considering she’s pretty much right up there with Kate Chastain as one of the best chief stews in the Below Deck universe, that’s particularly unfair. Because Daisy is really good at her job. (Seriously, even Kate says so.) If the worst mistake you make in a charter season is radio’ing that you “found” more rosé, you’re a pretty stellar department head.
Meanwhile, the charter guests’ beach picnic remains a cringeworthy affair as the ladies all go around in a circle doling out some of the most insincere affirmations you’ve ever heard. Like, Dani Soares is stuck serving everyone and she can hardly stomach all the fakery. It’s worth noting here, however, that I was reminded this week that this isn’t the first time we’ve seen Erica Rose‘s mom, Cindi Rose, on Bravo! Back in 2016, she appeared in a recurring capacity on Married to Medicine: Houston. While she wasn’t an official cast member on the one-season wonder, Cindi filled a Patricia Altschul-esque role as the grande dame of the Houston medical community, and was quite a controversial character even back then.
Upon the guests’ return to the boat, Captain Glenn sets sail for Milna. At which point, Natasha complains that she’s sick of cooking while sailing. And insists she can’t even prep for dinner while the boat is heeling. Tacking? You’d think I’d know basic sailing terminology by now. I’m pretty sure it’s heeling. But either way, Natasha’s not cooking. Naturally, this royally screws up her already terrible time management. And she decides to start prepping the ladies’ women’s empowerment dinner at 7 p.m. That’s only one hour before service is supposed to start. She’s so far behind that Colin Macrae (once again) volunteers to cook the crew’s dinner. So that people, you know, actually get fed. Except he gets pulled away from the galley to do his actual job while anchoring. And suddenly Natasha’s left all by herself in the mess she created.
The 8 p.m. start for dinner comes and goes. Not even a stern check-in from Glenn can get Natasha up to speed. The guests are ready to sit down. Erica‘s plotting how to exclude her frenemy Bianca to the end of the table. The crew is starving. Glenn’s getting impatient. This is a bad look for Cheffy. A crew dinner of pasta carbonara gets served at 8:40 p.m. And dinner service for the paying charter guests starts 56 minutes behind schedule. Even though they’ve been waiting for nearly an hour, the women are impressed with the meal. There’s Croatian scampi, steak and potatoes, and (gluten-free) yogurt cake with caramel and cherry compote. Plus a cuttingly sarcastic toast to Bianca eating bread for the first time in a year. Girl power! At least the ladies seemed to genuinely like the song Colin and Sydney Zaruba wrote and performed for them. Right?
Meanwhile, Gary King‘s been moping around the boat like a sad puppy in the wake of Alli Dore pumping the breaks on their boatmance. Even Sydney can sense the awkwardness between the pair…And not even Gary volunteering to help do the dishes will break the tension. In other couple news, Dani is worried about where her relationship with Jean-Luc Cerza Lanaux could possibly go after the season ends. And in the non-couple corner, Daisy vents to Colin about Natasha‘s utter lack of initiative. She literally served dinner a full hour late — Glenn even had to help serve! — and she just doesn’t seem to care. Will a pep talk between all the department heads (and Colin) before the next charter make a difference? Unlikely at this point.
The next morning, the end of the charter is finally in sight. And while Natasha is officially over everything, Gary pulls Alli into a cabin for an attempt at a heart-to-heart. However, Alli’s not budging. There’s nothing Gary can do now that she knows he slept with Sydney. And he has no one to blame but himself. While Natasha serves the guests their final breakfast, Jean-Luc is starting to wonder if Dani‘s holding back from him because of his age. And Glenn and the deck crew are stressing over docking. At Marina Lav, they have to return to the scene of the crash, and it would be much worse to repeat the accident with guests on board.
After testing the throttle a couple times, Glenn manages to successfully park the boat without smashing into the dock. Success! Erica Rose and her entourage disembark and we’re finally done with the mean girl charter. At the tip meeting, Captain Glenn points out that, while the guests left happy, he’s started noticing a certain lack of professionalism among the crew. You know, things like crew dinner being prepared late and multiple instances of guests catching the crew gossiping about them. Not a good look, or a good way to finish out the season. With just one last charter, he wants them to finish strong. The good news is Erica and co. left a great tip of $18,450. That’s $2,050 per person according to Gary‘s math, and frankly more than anyone expected they would get.
With charter number seven down, it’s time for a crew night out! As they get ready, Alli confesses to Sydney that she broke things off with Gary. And despite Alli doing it essentially because of her, Sydney’s feeling more vindictive than grateful. Now that she’s caused the rift she wanted, she says she doesn’t regret hooking up with Gary. It’s all going according to her devious plan, now. [Insert maniacal laugh here…] Side note: on the way to dinner, the girls play a rather hilarious game of F–k, Marry, Kill involving all the season’s charter guests. And surprise, surprise, they unanimously decide to off both Erica and Barrie Drewitt-Barlow.
To be honest, the crew dinner at Restoran Perivoj is a bit of a circus. First, Colin gently confronts Natasha, telling her he’s doing too much in the galley. Hint, hint: she needs to do her job herself. At the other end of the table, Dani‘s rather loudly telling Jean-Luc she’s ready to have babies with him. (On a more serious note, he does pull her aside and tell her he’s ready for a relationship once they finish the season. He won’t even listen to her protestations that she’ll be robbing him of his golden years. Is JL falling in love?) And Gary? Gary is inexplicably cuddling up to Sydney, who’s more than happy to flirt while Alli sits back and watches from two seats over.
Sensing trouble brewing, Colin tries to pull Gary to the side and talk some sense into him. But Gary’s drunk and horny and has already made up his mind. If he can’t have Alli, he’s hooking up with Sydney again. Colin points out what a monstrously terrible idea this is, but Gary is determined to self-sabotage. Like Colin laments, it’s like trying to reason with monkeys on a see-saw. At a certain point, you just have to throw your hands up and say, “not my monkeys, not my circus.” There you go, Gary. You’re on your own to make whatever terrible decisions you want.
TELL US – DID YOU RECOGNIZE CINDI FROM MARRIED TO MEDICINE: HOUSTON? IS NATASHA THE WEAKEST LINK ON THE CREW? WILL GARY ACTUALLY HOOK UP WITH SYDNEY AGAIN?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]