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Recaps

Texicanas Recap: The Truce

On last night’s episode of Texicanas, the moment we have all been waiting for finally happened! Could Luz Ortiz and Mayra Farret be ready to bury the hatchet? Or will this meeting only lead to more hurt feelings and catfights? I’m sure all the ladies are ready to put the drama to rest, and so am I!

Luz and her best friend, Janet Montagne are on their way to meet the other ladies at the gun range. Apparently, Luz organized yet another event excluding Mayra. After leaving her out, Luz calls Mayra outside only to discover she is blocked. If you ignore me and keep inviting MY friends places without me, I would block you too.

Jordan Verroi Summer House

Welcome to Summer House where double standards are alive and well. According to Kyle Cooke, Paige Desorbo has been leading Carl Radke on for 2 months. If Paige has been leading Carl on then what was he doing to Lauren Wirkus for 2 summers straight? The hypocrisy is hard for me to wrap my head around. Then I remember I’m watching 35ish-year-old men act like 21 year olds. At this point, the visiting Vanderpump Rules crew seem more mature than the Summer House. Not sure who that says more about.

Before the night comes to a close, Hannah Berner and Jordan Verroi have a private chat on the patio. Hannah has hit her boiling point and I don’t blame her. For the last 2 months, Jordan has been elusive and hard to understand. She called him out for the outlandish stories and lies he continues to spew. What I love most about this house is even after a disagreement, they can put it aside and rage through the night. Paige leaves to go to Justin’s boat – I’d like a visual of this guy please and thank you.

Teen Mom 2 Episode Recap: Reunion Part 2

On last night’s episode of Teen Mom 2, we saw the true definition of passive aggressive with several of the cast. I think Chelsea Houska and Leah Messer are the only people who don’t hate anyone on set. I guess MTV said if we can’t get the group on stage together, we will outsource others for them to fight. The second installment of the reunion is all over the place. There may not be much meat and potatoes to it, but there is definitely BEEF.

We ended Part 1 of the reunion with Jenelle Evans running off the stage playing victim. Chile, please… Jenelleand her problematic husband, David Eason have made numerous comments on social media that have been a part of her storyline on the show. Therefore,   I see nothing wrong with Nessa Diab. confronting her on the show. I can see straight through the tears. It’s funny how someone who has attacked several people is now crying when asked about her comments. If you can’t take the heat, keep your mouth shut!

90 Day Fiancé Happily Ever After Season Premier Recap: Dirty Dancing

On last night’s episode of 90 Day Fiance Happily Ever After, Larissa Dos Santos Lima  revealed a huge secret that left everyone shocked. As if she and  Colt Johnson’s marriage wasn’t riddled with enough challenges, we find out yet another one. Colt’s mother, Debbie Johnson, was in complete disbelief to find out her husband son dared to keep anything from her. MeanwhilePedro Jimeno, is living his best life in the Dominican Republic. He is surrounded by people, who actually like him. Some more than others…  The Family Chantel will be charging their tasers and looking up the number to immigration, once they see this episode. SMH….

In an effort to make his drama queen happy, Colt finally emancipated his wife from the house. Larissa donned a dress fit for an escort to go on their casino date. Does Colt go anywhere besides places to eat and the casino? It’s clear Larissa never leaves the house. Her style choices scream that she rarely gets the opportunity to dress up. While at the casino, Colt promises to file for an adjustment of status for his wife. This will give them the opportunity to eventually travel back to Brazil to meet his in-laws for the first time. By the look on Larissa’s face, she isn’t thrilled to unveil her husband to her family. I guess, for now, Colt is still her dirty big American secret.

Real Housewives Of Potomac Recap: The Wig Easy

On last week’s episode, of The Real Housewives of Potomac, Michael Darby found himself in some hot water! He allegedly made sexual comments towards another man, and Robyn Dixon of all people overhead him. It’ll be interesting to see the fallout if Robyn or Candiace Dillard decided to reveal what they heard. This could have massive ramifications on his marriage to Ashley Darby.

Karen Huger and Gizelle Bryant also ended up on semi decent terms after last week. Their relationship is always changing so they might be back in bad terms by the end of this episode. Why even are the fighting anymore? At this point it seems like they’re just fighting for the sake of it and for no real reason. It’s so back and forth so hopefully they’ll make further forward progress this week.

Bethenny Frankel

Oh Real Housewives Of New York don’t ever change. Do I open ever recap with this sentence? But seriously Real Housewives Of New York spirals through cycles of emotions faster than a Cathy cartoon about dating and PMS, and I don’t want it any other way.

Anytime you take these ladies anywhere – even to the doctor; even to the nail salon; even to Luann de Lesseps‘ yardsale in the Hamptons, they exist in their own self-contained orbit of revolving arguments, makeups, friendships, feuds, hurt feelings, men… Like a drunken comet hurtling towards church here they come, slathered in statement necklaces and macrame, and shedding skin from laser facials, and shedding tears from all the people who have wronged them first leading them hear to a sky-high tolerance for emotional instability and pain. And hell hath no fury like a group of middle-aged women scorned, with nothing else to lose. Amen, sistas. A-MEN, but you don’t need ’em cause you have each other. (And cheesecake on the lanai, of course). 

Southern Charm Recap:

Last night’s Southern Charm was swirling with the confirmation of the “did they or didn’t they” hook-up rumors surrounding Kathryn Dennis and Whitney Sudler-Smith. Shep Rose’s love life was once again thwarted by ill-thought Instagram posts, and we got to peek inside Craig Conover’s fledgling pillow company. It doesn’t get much better than that!

The episode begins with Kathryn unable to summon Austen Kroll on any of her smart devices. Across town, Cameran Eubanks is getting some much needed relaxation at the nail salon before being interrupted by Recent College Grad who comes in like a bull in a china shop. She’s got a cooler of kombucha and she can’t stop talking about her last name and her royal status in Charleston society. However, her politician father’s affair caused a serious blacklist for her family. She wasn’t even able to be a debutante! Cameran’s husband has known this girl’s family for decades (he gave her swimming lessons when she was four), and Cam likens her to a little sister. She gives RCG some sisterly advice–she needs tone it down and mind her manners. Cameran reminds RCG that her behavior at Patricia Altschul’s dinner party was over-the-top and obnoxious.

Kyle Richards

Congratulations Camille Grammer – you’ve officially broken free of Kelsey and restarted your life with a new man by getting married on last night’s Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills. Gorgeous wedding! Too bad you dragged your way back Kelsey personality along with you for the ride in the clown car to David C. Meyer.

Oh, a lie detector test. Is that what we’re doing now instead of printing out 99 point font textestessss to prove our innocence? I feel like I need to write this portion of the recap in Comic Sans font, because surely this must be some British Humor! Now I’m still team Lisa Vanderpump, but lady – I cannot sit back and allow John Sessa to carry the Pom-Shield and become the defacto Kyle Richards: professional sidekick, stand-in kitchen remodel viewer, and mouthpiece of menace. John Sessa (and his barely buttoned shirt) needs to stick to training puppies to bite PK and leave the Housewives stuff to the big dogs.