I just don’t even know where to begin. Who provoked whom, who started what, who did such and such illegal thing… Brandi and LeeAnne are a two-headed snake biting its own tail after getting confused by all the excess weave hair in their faces. They should just go to couples therapy and be done with it. I can’t pick a winner or a loser here. Well, I can pick a winner, but it’s Stephanie Hollman. Stephanie ‘PH–king’ Hollman.
However, so many good things did happen for the ladies of Dallas last night! Stephanie bought a foam machine. LeeAnne picked a date and wedding location. D’Andra Simmons got a company. Woot!
If the Real Housewives of New Jersey haven’t been banned from the fly-over states, it’s a corn shucking miracle! Poor Oklahoma is still dealing with the weaves and wackiness from last week’s episode as the ladies head off to a tense dinner. Margaret Josephs is happy to hear that Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga seemed to have smoothed over their argument…although Tre is unaware of how riled up Joe Gorga is after hearing Melissa’s rehash of the nasty breakfast. At the restaurant, Jennifer Aydin is talking about her ginormous house. She has to have an extra “wife” to cook and clean her seven bedroom house. She even has cameras in every room and she does random bag checks before the nanny heads out for the evening. Jackie Goldschneider finds it frighteningly hilarious that Jennifer trusts the nanny with her children but not with her collection of Chanel.
To change the subject, Margaret enlists the ladies in a game of two truths and a lie. Her statements: she used to fool around with her high school gym teacher, she’s only done cocaine once, and her ex-husband used to lock her in a closet when she made him angry. The women are surprised to hear her lie was the gym teacher. They can’t imagine feisty Margaret putting up with that in her marriage. No one believes Dolores Catania when she states she had sex with her ex-husband/roommate Frank Catania last week. Jennifer goes for shock value with tales of playing the submissive to her bestie’s dominatrix, getting a butt lift, and pooping herself in traffic. She was lying about the butt lift. Jennifer was wild before she met her ultra-conservative husband.
Well, it couldn’t last forever. Now don’t get me wrong, Survivor: David vs. Goliath continues to be one of the best seasons in several years by all measures. Of course, the show had to come down a bit at some point following what had truly been two back-to-back “Hall of Fame”-worthy Tribal Councils. Tonight’s double-episode extravaganza was solid, but not legendary. It was entertaining, but not all that exciting. But it’s impossible to match what we’ve been given the past two weeks. I urge you – implore you – to go get one of your non-Survivor-watching friends right now, and get them to start binging this season. Because, oh man, this season is still red-hot and far from over. Friends don’t let friends not watch Survivor, right?
As I do at the beginning of every recap, please heed the following: Remember that this recap assumes that you have already seen this week’s Episode 10 and 11 of Survivor: David vs.Goliath. If you have not and don’t want to be spoiled, please come back later! It’s important to add that while we WILL hit on all of the important developments of the episode, this is not a linear “blow-by-blow” recap. It is more of a discussion and reaction of what we just witnessed together.
CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR MORE, AND THIS IS YOUR LAST *SPOILER* WARNING!
About the only person sad to see Chandler go is Caroline Bedol, who like kinda like-liked him, but kinda just like-liked having someone to funnel her dysfunction onto. BUT now that Chandler is gone Caroline has inherited his entire freezer drawer full of ice cream pints! It turns out ice cream consumption is the nail in one’s coffin on My Seanna, though! You have been warned that frozen dairy kills careers if mixed with Kate.
Tyler Baltierra and Catelynn Lowellhave returned from the marriage retreat in Sedona. They find out she is pregnant. Sigh… We knew this was coming, but this week’s episode of Teen Mom OG goes further into behind the scenes. What is uncovered is sure to shock and surprise everyone including Catelynn!
As we all still manage to digest the turkey, pumpkin pie and leftovers from this past week, we’re also trying to digest the crazy-epic blindside we witnessed on Thanksgiving Eve. Of course, I’m talking about last Wednesday’s episode of Survivor: David vs. Goliath. This season, by all accounts, has been amazing. It begs many of us to ask the question the non-Survivor-watchers. What the heck are you doing if not watching Survivor this season? Do you not like great television? Or in the words of Russell Crowe: Are you not entertained???
It was a Thanksgiving treat that came early, maybe for all but Dan Rengering, the Goliath who seemed to be in the absolute best position…until he wasn’t. It was one for the ages and included a second-straight “Hall of Fame” caliber Tribal Council the likes of which we have – literally – never seen. And if you missed any of the action? Get caught up with our Episode 9 Recap, as well as checking out the Podcast below.
The most important part of any reunion is to dissect the outfits. First of all, Shannon Beador looks great! I don’t know if it’s the glowy spray tan indicating a break from Dr. Moon‘s holistic practices of wiping Shannon’s entire body in tan resistant mineral powders to ward of surface level UV free radicals, or the 30lb weight loss, or finally shedding her toxic friendship with Tamra Judge, but Shannon looks better than we’ve seen her in years. THIS is the divorced Shannon we were craving all season!
Since Kandi had fibroids and a high-risk pregnancy with Ace, she and Todd Tucker are considering a surrogate (or two!) to make babies out of their two remaining embryos. Until they learn surrogates – the good ones who aren’t hanging in the hood – cost $100k per uterine rental, and Todd might not even get to rub their bellies. At least Todd realizes he better get to work at the OLG instead of just sampling fried chicken and cocktails while talking about work.