Reality Tea is ranking ALL the Housewives from every season and every city! Our list is broken down into three parts with Housewives ranked from worst to ‘best’ (or best of the worst, if you will). Below is Part 1.
What makes a superior species of Housewives? Is it class? Money? Fabulous plastic surgery and good shoes? Beautiful home? A revolving door of crazy that keeps us on our cheaply-clad toes? Is it a supportive husband? An in-home zoo of fabulous miniature fluff balls clad in their own designer wardrobe? Is it a witty zinger or indispensable advice? Is it their ability to rewrite history without irony? To crack open the egg of their emotional travails in front of cameras? Or is it their ability to deftly control the scenery while cracking a Chanel whip?
Real Housewives; real problems! Ana Quincoces, the one-time star of the seemingly-canceled Real Housewives Of Miami, was arrested Sunday night for driving on a suspended a license with knowledge. Her excuse: cockroaches!
Ana, who parlayed her post-Bravo stint into a career as a chef, claims she was staying in a real estate agent friend’s cockroach invested listing and had to flee because she fears roaches – even though her license was suspended! Ana was arrested Key Largo, FL on Sunday early morning after police spotted and “recognized” her SUV during a security check of a local park around 3:40 in the morning. She was taken to the Plantation Key jail on the misdemeanor charge and released on her own recognizance Sunday at 5:14 a.m.
Mere months after finalizing her divorce from Kris Humphries, the reality stargot engaged to Kanye West in a lavish, over-the-top proposal. Tell me: why does Kim always look so glum for the lady who has everything?
CLICK CONTINUE READING FOR A CLOSE-UP OF ALL THE RINGS!
Dah-yum. Former Real Housewives of Miami star Ana Quincoces is clearly no longer under the muzzle of a Bravo contract, and she has a lot (and I mean A LOT to say). Whether it's dishing about her one-time co-stars or trying to set the record straight about how little she cares about her time on the show (is it weird that I actually believe her?), Ana is holding nothing back in recent post on her personal blog. Don't even get me started about what she's been unleashing on Twitter in light of the RHOM reunion! Enough fluff from me, let's get to it!
Ana begins, "First, I am not bitter that I am no longer a “housewife”. It is an unfortunate reality that this show did not perform as expected. Maybe it failed to provide that magic element that makes a show a hit. But I have been quite satisfied sitting on the sidelines. All season I felt like I had dodged a bullet, and I am grateful that my airtime was significantly reduced. Had it been up to me, I would not have appeared at all this season, particularly since I was not given a voice."
Last night Lea hosted her annual The Black Gala and while things were a little more lackluster than usual in the auction department the drama surrounding the grand affair more than compensated. That and the diamonds of course! While the so-called "Cubans" are anything but Lea's besties, diamonds will always and forever be a Housewife's best friends, borrowed or no!
So Lea is hosting her big event, but most of the girls are playing hookie to go to something called Gay Polo. Gay Polo is polo, but there's tigers (and cougars) and leprechauns. Adriana de Moura and Marysol Patton were making a big, ginormous deal out of it like it was some spectacular extravaganza and Prince Harry was going to come out wearing nothing but a loin cloth and some body paint reading Kiss Me, I'm Gay. He's not gay, obviously, but he is hot and exciting. And he plays polo!
Adriana de Moura is just so sick of vintage. I mean vintage boats, vintage cars, vintage marriage licenses, vintage friendships with Lea Black. All that old crap is just boring her and she's tired of it. It so doesn't count if it's old and decrepit right?! Too bad Frederic doesn't agree. So that's the season premiere of Real Housewives of Miami; Adriana and Lea aren't friends anymore, everyone is wondering why the hell Adriana is getting married if she's already married, and no one is telling the truth.
Let's dive in! Nautical reference intended. Things kick off withJoanna Krupa pretending she's classy and all that by hopping off a private jet into Lea's awaiting town car. Apparently they became best friends in the off-season. I'm gonna venture to guess Roy (Lea's hubs) predicted Joanna was gonna lose it one of these times and need a good defense attorney. We also know Lea loves the crazy. So anyway, they're friends and Lea and Adriana are NOT!
Lea is hurt that Adriana has been lying about her marital status for years and not only that when Lea was getting her very elderly and hard working a$$ unduly handed to her by Ana Quincoces at last season's reunion, Adriana sat there and said nothing in her defense. Lea cries and Joanna pats her knee affectionately cause she hates Adriana too!