Finally a position on Farrah’s resume full of lies and delusions that we can take seriously… Farrah Abraham has landed a job as a stripper.
Of course, the former Teen Mom star is not a real stripper, silly. Just like she’s not a porn star. Farrah’s new stripper job at Palazio Gentlemen’s Club in Austin is nothing more than research for the erotic novels she’s not literate enough to write and the serious A-list movie roles she’s not yet been offered.
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“I’m doing research,” insisted Farrah. “A friend of mine works there and I am researching. I’ve been trying out all the roles that make up a gentleman’s club, including cocktailing and dancing. There’s management and there’s cooking too. It’s job shadowing that I hope pays off.”
Farrah went on to compare her new gig to the research Jennifer Aniston did for her role in We’re the Millers. Right. Because I’m sure Jennifer got hired and collected paychecks from the clubs she spent time in. #delusional
“In the same way Jennifer Aniston researched her role as a stripper, that’s what I’m doing,” said Farrah. “It’s how I get the information to write my books and do my movies. I’m not free to talk about what those future projects may be. But I’m interested in hearing all the women’s stories – and while I’m doing it, I’m getting paid. I’m getting paid to play a role and get informed.”
Someone from Palazio Gentlemen’s Club confirmed Farrah‘s employment but failed to mention all the important research Farrah the Serious Actress is doing when she’s not stockpiling dollar bills in her g-string.
“She was hired a couple weeks ago as a cocktail waitress but wanted to make more money dancing, so they moved her up to the stage,” shared the source. “She was definitely not shy and looked like she knew what she was doing. She was wearing a nude thong and a bejeweled bra. She wasn’t awkward at all and was actually quite good.”
Because we could never hear enough about her naked antics, the source said that Farrah has rocked all three stages at the club, the main stage and the two side stages, and one time guys swarmed the stage with money when she laid down on her back and ripped off her bra. In the interest of research. Of course.
So when does Farrah plan to play the role of mother to research the Christian parenting book she wants to write?
Speaking of the forgotten child, who is raising Sophia while Farrah grows her portfolio of literacy, auditions for movie roles, opens a restaurant, promotes her sex toys, films the Couples Therapy reunion, and swings from a stripper pole? Most likely, Farrah‘s father Michael, who she accused of abusing her when she was a child. #MotherOfTheYear
Farrah needs to stop with the lies and bullsh-t excuses and just own it – porn star, stripper, yogurt maker, whatever, nobody cares. Just. Own. It.
TELL US – DOES ANYONE BELIEVE FARRAH’S “RESEARCH” STORY?
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