Last night on Vanderpump Rules lies flowed as precipitously as questions of truth and all converged together at the mouth of a river named Jax Taylor. Or something like that…
While Scheana Marie is on a blissful honeymoon in Hawaii, back home at SUR (SUR is a city now) things are erupting into a civil war – a civil war that is the opposite of civil, of course.
Kristen Doute has been “blowing up” Jax’s phone with texts and phone calls insisting he tell “the truth” about Tom Sandoval and “Miami Girl.” Once, a very long time ago, when Jax was trying to look like boyfriend of the year to future pizza parlor dumpee Carmen Dickman, he disclosed to Kristen and Carmen that the tabloid stories were true: Tom 1 did play three minutes in heaven? hell? with Miami Girl. Jax has been trying to retract it ever since; putting Kristen off, telling her to leave him out of it and deal with it on her own.
But Kristen has been using this statement to zealously fuel her fervor. It has stoked her loins with future retribution, the little talisman she has carried deep in her heart, that there is a way to weasel in between the home wrecking hussy Ariana Madix and Tom’s future and re-seize him for her demented little self. You think I am exaggerating, but Kristen is like Golum with the ring in Lord Of The Rings.
Kristen teams up with Stassi Schroeder and resorts to using Jax Taylor as a source of the “truth” regarding what happened in Miami – Jax has changed his story several times. As a result Kristen ends up on the outs with all of her friends from SUR!
In anticipation for the onslaught of negativity she is surely to receive, Kristen announced she’s taking a wee break from twitter to focus on her healthy relationship with James Kennedy, her friends, and bowling. She also celebrated her birthday!
It’s a topsy-turvy world in Kardashian Kingdom! Kris Jenner is losing her executive kontrol over the family $100 bill Kim Kardashian, and Scott Disick is reconsidering his priorities and deciding that all the Bentleys, Rolls, and Maseratis in the world aren’t more important than his kids!
After getting his reality show canceled Eddie Cibrian has landed a new job, doing what he does best: adultery acting! Brandi Glanville‘s notorious ex-husband will be starring in Parenthood star Monica Potter‘s new sitcom which is “loosely based” on her own life.
The yet untitled project will star Eddie in a role he’s familiar with – ex-husband! The premise of the show is that Monica Potter plays Bridget, an actress with three ex-husbands, each of whom she has a child with, says Variety.
Nothing like a little snow day delirium to get the instagram videos flowin’! Melissa Gorga and Jacqueline Laurita have been putting all the bad New Jersey weather to good use with a little blizzard fun!
Together with their husbands Joe Gorga and Chris Laurita, the Real Housewives Of New Jersey stars busted into the wine cellar and had an old fashioned dance party and tons of rotten egg smelling wine and karaoke!
“Snowed in!!! We are delirious!!” Melissa wrote. Clearly. She got her best J. Faux on and while Jacqueline and Chris Laurita mimicked a raunchy high school dance while the chaperones were distracted by someone sneaking in Boone’s Farms!
Then Melissa and Poison belted out a little Michael Bolton! I warn you – it’s worse than Melissa’s usual singing. In fact there was lots of karaoke! “I’m totally sober by the way,” Jacqueline insisted. OK, yeah, you can judge for yourself.
You can watch their silly fun in the snow videos below!
I’m just gonna go ahead and say it – Claudia Jordan bores me and there’s something really disingenuous about her. The constant backpedaling hyperbole, coupled with bragging about how smart, accomplished, and career-savvy she is, without any of the behavior to back it up just irks me. Furthermore, anyone this bothered by Porsha Williams needs a priority realignment.
“I was not crying about Porsha or the fact that I’m biracial!” Claudia announces “There was such a buildup of so many things that it just took one little thing to push me over the top. I am not that emotionally invested in Porsha, and if you ever catch me getting there, please take me out to pasture and put me out of my misery!”
Givenchy creative director Ricardo Tisci wants you to know his love for Kanye West will never die and he’s a stand by your man kind of a guy, even if it means dressing Kim Kardashian like a giant dilapidated sofa killed his cred in the fashion industry!
Ricardo has long had a friendship with Kanye, so when his pal decided to hitch his wagon wheel to Kim, Ricardo embraced that change as well. But he says many fashion insiders have panned his relationship with the Keeping Up With The Kardashians kouple. I can’t imagine why…
In fact, Ricardo says the fact that he would even dress Kim points to the honesty of their friendship. “I’m not there to dress a celebrity. I dress people even when they don’t have an Oscar nomination or they don’t have an album out. If they’re my friends, I respect them to the end,” he explains. “And you need to feel people stay with you because they love you, not only as an artist, but also as a human being. Look at Kanye and Kim—at the beginning, I was the only one.”
Oh blind items – who doesn’t love a good bit of reality gossip! What’s better – a dishy blind item revealed! What’s better-better, a dishy blind item about a Real Housewife behaving super badly revealed!