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Oh, sweet mercy. Kim Zolciak Biermann has gotten two gifts this month: a beautiful new son and a lawsuit from her own mom! Karen Zolciak, who we previously saw getting thrown out of Kim's $1M wedding on Don't Be Tardy For The Wedding is tired of her daughter excluding her from her family.

In retaliation she is taking her daughter to court and demanding she get visitation with Kim's kids! I wonder if the wig collection is also included in the custody decree? 

TamraTattles originally broke the story and discovered that on Tuesday, Aug 28th Karen filed a suit in Fulton Superior Court seeking visitation rights over her granddaughters. The Biermann boys are not included in the filing. 

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Last Sunday's episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey continues to make waves for the cast. And it seems that while nobody likes Teresa Giudice, nobody can stop talking about her either. That must burn like vomit coming up. 

First up, Caroline Manzo admits that after calling her former made-for-TV friend "ugly" and "psychotic" in a vitriolic episode that left me pining for the timid-by-comparison-scenes of The Exorcist, she hasn't spoke to Teresa in a year. Well, I'm sure the upcoming reunion will change all that! 

“The only thing positive about it was I finally said what I needed to say and I’m done. And that was a year ago,” Caroline told Celebuzz about their altercation. 

“And I have not seen or spoken to Teresa since the reunion last year with the exception of the Bravo commercial – I was in the same room with her. My last words to Teresa Giudice were at the reunion last year. And can I tell you, it’s been a wonderful year.”

Well, I see Caroline is still keeping it Giudice (i.e. bitter and grudge-holding). 

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Everybody's having boys these days! The latest celebrity couple to welcome a son is Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott! This is the fourth child for the couple who joins siblings Stella, Liam, and Hattie. "It's a boy!!!!," Tori announced on Twitter

"Please join us in welcoming Finn Davey McDermott," Tori she revealed on her ediTORIal blog. Finn was born yesterday at 5:39 PM. He was 6 lbs, 6 oz and 20" long. Congratulations to the Craft Wars star and her family! 

CONGRATULATIONS TORI, DEAN, AND FAMILY! 

 

Oh, lawd. Well, it's happening… I'm being held hostage and forced to write recaps of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. I oughta just call these recaps: Memories Of The Mountain State: The Reality TV Homecoming Of Mary McClelland. 

So last night baby Kaitlyn nearly came out of Anna's biscuit before she was done bakin' or bacon depending on who you ask: Mama or Honey Boo Boo

Seventeen-year-old Anna started having contractions at 34 weeks and said they made her vajayjay hurt. Girl, I have got to tell you – THAT is called pregnancy. So they called 9-1-1 and raced Anna to the hospital in an am'blance. Seriously. Did the pageant mobile not have gas in it? Did Honey put spray tan in the tank? Mama yells at her not to push. 

At the hospital Anna is disappointed she is in pain and has stuff on her stomach. Well, stuff comin' out of yer coochie is what having a baby is like, Anna. It hurts a lot more comin out than it does goin' in, girl! The doctors send Anna home and she's on strict bedrest. No baby Kaitlyn yet – Mama is relieved because taking care of a premie is a lot of work. Honey Boo Boo pokes at Anna repeatedly to make sure she's not pushing out a bacon. All clear. 

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Joe Giudice has been in trouble with the law for what seems like YEARS! The Real Housewies of New Jersey star recently rejected a plea bargain offered by New Jersey prosecutors in his identity fraud case, instead opting to go to trial and plead not-guilty.  

Joe's trial date was initially set for October 1, 2012, but according to Chief Assistant Prosecutor Jay McCann it will likely be postponed until 2013. 

“The chances of it going on that day are slim,” Mr. McCann told Celebuzz. “We are going to have to get closer to the day to see if the judge will have time.”

“The court tries to give preference to cases for those who are incarcerated first,” he added. According to Mr. McCann it is likely that Joe will take the stand in his own defense and the trial will take place sometime before June 2013. 

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Giuliana and Bill Rancic have finally had their dream come true. The couple welcomed a baby boy via surrogate into the world late Wednesday evening. 

""The 'Duke' has landed. Edward Duke Rancic was welcomed into the world last night at 7lbs 4oz. G & I feel blessed beyond words…We did it!," Bill ecstatically tweeted. 

"Bill and I are blessed beyond words to welcome Edward into our lives," Giuliana told E! News. "Thank you so much to everyone who supported us along the way. We are so in love with the little guy already!"

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On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New York our friend the Countess got a little handsy with a pirate. Who knew she was into role playing and kinky sex. Gag.

While it would appear that LuAnn de Lesseps dogged out on longtime boyfriend Jacques Azoulay and snuck Tomas, a pre-teen pirate, into her bedroom at a luxury villa in St. Barths, LuAnn denies the allegations. She claims that while it looks bad it was actually quite innocent and that she should never have told a “white lie” by denying that Tomas was at the villa. Remember she kept insisting it was “old Italian friends.”

“He gave me a ride home and wanted to see the house, so I brought him in. Then he left. That was it,” LuAnn insists to Life & Style.”I told Jacques exactly what happened. He and I are still in love and happy.” In fact, LuAnn says the couple who is allegedly trying for a storyline baby (should Jacques don a pirate costume to stimulate her ovaries?) are on vacation right now. Hopefully not in St. Barths!

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Whhheweee… y’alls gots somz prob-lems in the Here Comes Honey Boo Boo house! According to a report from the local police in McIntyre, Georgia they were called to the home over a suspected burglary. What on earth would they steal?! Mountain Dew? Pageant costumes? Honey Boo Boo hairs? Lawd only knows.

Apparently June and Alana Thompson returned home from their thrice daily trip to Kuntry Store for Nascar accessories to find the front door ajar. So they called the police.

RadarOnline confirmed with Chief Amerson of the McIntyre Police Department that the call was definitely made but said the police officer’s report was still pending. Luckily it does not appear that any hot rollers were harmed in the potential robbery.

The possible burglary did not deter Honey Boo Boo‘s appearance in this weekend’s Miss Sparkle and Shine pageant where I image she both sparkled and shined!

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