Sometimes my reality gets skewed. It's been skewed as of late. I'm bewildered. The light of musicals, Southern belle charm, and quick wit wrapped in a tiny little package has disappointed me. Yet, I still can't blame her. I feel as if she's been brainwashed. I can't think of another logical explanation.
I'll just come right out and say it. I've heard the rumors, and I've read the gossip, but I so didn't want to believe it was true. But we now have confirmation. Sigh. It seems that everyone's favorite multi-talented spitfire little cupcake Kristin Chenoweth is, in fact, dating former Bachelor alum and d-bag pilot Jake Pavelka. When did the world go so awry? I'd hoped that she was his beard, but it doesn't seem like that is the case. I don't know what to believe anymore. Gracious.
This was a good week for our favorite reality shows! It seems that everyone is getting back into the swing of 2013, and with a routine comes our favorite old habits…watching some of the most fantastically trashy television series known to man.
Chris Harrison is on hand, as well, to keep every single most dramatic rose ceremony running smoothly. Not on hand? Emily Maynard. She broke Sean's heart on the Bachelorette and, for the sake of my sanity, needs to stay far away from this season.
Sean has fully recovered from his heartbreak and is ready to try again on the Bachelor. Clearly, he's a fool. He says the idea of possibly meeting his future wife during this journey (drink up, my friends) is kind of exciting and kind of intimidating.
Sean adds, "I want the end result. I want to protect my woman. I want to love my woman. I want to honor her. I want to love her with everything I have, and I want to be the best possible man I can be for her. I want to be rich in love."
Because ABC doesn't completely hate me,Arie Luyendyk, Jr. stops by Sean's pad to help him prepare for what is to come. Mr. Holy Hotness schools Sean on how to properly kiss a woman: Eye contact. Use your hands. Touch her hair. Touch her face. Tease her with your tongue. No lizard tongue. Use your whole body. #coldshower
Curse you, Arie, for not signing up for this train wreck of a show solely for my entertainment.
Timing is everything, right? Bachelor couple Ben Flajnik and Courtney Robertson break up, the two are thrust back into the media spotlight, and Ben announces a new TV project… coincidence or good planning?
According to Wetpaint Entertainment, Ben and the E! network are teaming up to bring us a new reality series about Ben's Sonoma-based winery, Envolve. “It will be about the day-to-day business of the company,” Wetpaint's source said. “Both from the wine-making and the marketing angles."
The source added, "Right now, the show is in the very early stages.Contracts haven’t even been signed but things are moving along."
Courtney is a model, mean girl, and villain. She cuts throats. Shawntel is a funeral director, quirky girl, and fan favorite. She embalms bodies.
Their Bachelor history:
Courtney "won" her season of the Bachelor. She just ended her engagement to her "prize" Ben Flajnik. Shawntel was rejected by Brad Womack. Later, she crashed Ben's season, but Courtney threatened to leave if Ben kept her. Shawntel was sent home by Ben. Shawntel just announced her engagement to a regular guy.
Their writing style:
Courtney plans to write a juicy tell-all book about her sorrid past relationships and Bachelor experience. Shawntel wrote a tasteful autobiography about her career and Bachelor experience.
Did you catch that? In an interview with Celebuzz, Courtney reveals she's writing a tell-all memoir. I know you're excited, but you cannot pre-order your very own copy yet… so please calm down.
Can you believe it? Sean Lowe is already three quarters of the way to the Bachelor's most romantic final rose ceremony ever. ever.
According to Chris Harrison, Sean's journey is going well and it seems as if Emily Maynard is a distant memory."Sean's doing great and his choices and decisions so far have been really good," Chris told US Weekly. "He's looking for a lady: someone who respects herself and her family. It's not a crazy, 'let's get drunk, let's get naked' type of season because that's not Sean."
That said, Chris promised, "He has his shirt off a lot." See photo evidence below.
Now, Sean is the star and in charge of the roses. Sean, 28, is an entrepreneur from Dallas, Texas. Southern values, family, and faith are very important to Sean. In his free time, Sean enjoys camping, wakeboarding, dancing, outdoor activities, and attending concerts.
The ABC press release tells us what Sean is looking for as the Bachelor: "He wants to be the patriarch of a family that is centered on faith, love and, laughter. He is eager to be a supportive husband that will encourage his wife to chase her dreams, as well as someone who she can rely on to help her through good and bad times. Quite simply, he is looking for his best friend. Sean also wants a big family and would love to adopt a child along with having his own – just so long as he can pass along the values he was taught to his kids."
Taping is already underway for Sean's season, which will begin airing in January 2013. And, ABC must be eager to get this party started, because they have already released the pictures and first names of the 24 "new to us" women that will be competing for Sean's final rose (and that sweet Neil Lane rock). Undoubtedly, Sean's final rose will bring us the most romantic rose ceremony ever. Like, ever.. ever. I digress.. anyway, this information has been released at least three months earlier than normal. Their ages, hometowns, and occupations were not listed, however. In addition to the new faces, there are two familiar faces! Enjoy!
Also, check out the Sean Lowe is The Next Bachelor video at the end. It's hilarious!
CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON TO SEE THE PHOTOS & BIOS!
Chris Harrisonconfirmed the news to SheKnows on the Primetime Emmy Awards red carpet last night. When asked whom Chris would like to see as the next Bachelor… perhaps Sean, Chris answered, "Well, a little known secret, he has been chosen."