She begins, "Carlton asked me and some of her other girlfriends to meet up for a pole dancing lesson before we went over to Kimberly's graduation party. Although Kim and I were not super close at this point, I honestly couldn't remember a time since I've known her that she had hosted anything, so I was definitely not going to miss it. Carlton had a few drinks before our class. I was not on the same level, but almost instantly I starting feeling dizzy and nauseous. I assumed it was motion sickness from the poles spinning. But later I spiked a fever and was throwing up for the next day-and-a-half, so I think its safe to assume I caught some sort of bug and it wasn't just motion sickness." Oh girl. I was born, but it wasn't yesterday!
Continuing, Brandi writes, "We head over to Kim's and I thought it might be a good idea to grab a burger before we went in to hopefully help Carlton sober up a bit and help me to stop feeling so crappy. I feel bad I was ill at Kim's house, but it really couldn't have been helped. It was better that we didn't stay anyhow because Joyce was there in some ridiculous get up and I didn't want to have a confrontation with Miss Attention Seeker a high school graduation party."
I have to admit that I listened to Brandi's podcast as soon as she shared it on Monday night at midnight. I listened to the interview in the first half of the show with new RHONY starKristen Taekman and there weren't any big revelations or any juicy tidbits, so I was going to skip the rest, but I got sidetracked while it kept playing in the background. The second half of Brandi's show was an interview with Jim Florentine and Don Jamieson from VH1 Classic's "That Metal Show". Brandi started off their interview showing her classy side. Joking about child molestation.
Taking to her Bravo blog, Jacqueline Joyce begins, "This week's episode was quite interesting for me to watch as I discovered hypocrisy at its maximum exposition. At the beginning of the episode it was interesting to see Carlton and Brandi in their element at the pole dancing. I can understand why they like each other so much," adding, "What I can't understand is how in the world was Carlton so offended that my husband joked about having a naked room when our babies grow up — yet this is pretty much her main storyline? How was she so offended when I spoke about my husband's manhood, yet she does the exact same thing? I wonder if she is getting inspired by the very same things she hates about me and decides to do them? Too much double standard, especially for someone who claims to be so spiritual and to love women." I have often wondered that myself!
Kim Richards' daughter Kimberly graduated from high school and Kim is hosting a big celebration party for her. To prepare Kim, Kyle Richards, Kimberly and one of Kyle's daughters meet up for manicures. And Kyle needs a bikini wax. Kim announces her "wiener" has already been waxed and is looking cute. Kim should probably just go ahead and call it a "whiner" instead.
Kyle prefers to label hers a "tweeter" because <stage whisper> 'vagina' is yucky. It's times like this I wish Brandi Glanville would pop up in the corner of the screen yelling, "VAGINA, Kyle – VAGINA!" just to make Kyle smack her with a caftan after covering her eyes with a haircape.
A salon employee tells Kyle she can have her tweetiewiener dyed. Kyle Freudian Slips and thinks the lady told her to put her vagina on a "diet". But! It's a size 4! Kim's tweeter is a size 0 because it hasn't been eating anything – well nothing except a little "lipstick" she elaborated. How many weight watchers points does a tweeter get?
Joyce Giraud and Brandi Glanville do. not. like each other. According to Joyce the two initially started off friendly-ish but then Brandi began stirring the pot and manipulating behind the scenes by using Joyce as the scapegoat.
First of all, Joyce says she had no intention of fighting with Brandi in interviews and on blogs while the show was airing. "When filming ended we were all in a better place and then after that she just started attacking again on social media," Joyce recounts, "which I think is crazy."
"I understand the dynamic of the show, and that it's dramatic and all of that," Joyce clarifies. For Joyce this season and filming with Brandi was a surreal experience with a lot of learning moments. "I've never dealt with behavior like hers before – it's just something that I wasn't used to," she explains.
Joyce also insists that the two started off getting along, but since all roads lead back to Richards their fighting started with Kyle and Kim.
Joyce Giraud is really getting off on the wrong foot with co-star Brandi Glanville. The two have been at odds since day one. Following this week's argument at Lisa Vanderpump's dinner party the two are still enemies.
"The entire table was defending and making excuses for Brandi's behavior, and while I do find it admirable to stand up for your friends, true friends also stand up when someone is being attacked for no reason," Joycewrites. "Being a good friend doesn't mean you have to always agree with someone's bad behavior."
Aaaahhh… Brandi Glanville. I've almost run out of things to say about the mess that has become Brandi. It's sad at this point. She was always rough around the edges, but it's become abundantly clear that she's pretty much rough all over!
Brandi is still making excuses for her behavior this season of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. I wonder if she can't keep her mouth shut because she needs to open it constantly to insert wine - or her feet. In her latest Bravo blog she continues to place blame and point fingers at Joyce Giraud. These two need to stop talking about each other already. Let's hear what she has to say!
First up Lisa Vanderpump is to blame. Even though Lisa is ruining her reputation trying to be a good friend to Brandi this season, that's still not enough apparently!
"Lisa having a dinner to bring Joyce and I together is ironic because the whole reason we don't get along is because of Lisa and the Hairgate situation." How is that Lisa's fault – JOYCE chose to confront Lisa after Brandi instigated… "Lisa asked me to act as if Joyce didn't exist and now she is throwing a dinner for us? It's all so perplexing."
Things picked up at SUR where Brandi Glanville and Joyce Giraud were bickering up a storm about everything. If you could interpret through the litany of F-bombs and hair flips you might have heard Joyce tell Brandi she needs rehab.
All of the sudden Brandi starts tearing up and claims she just really misses her dog and needs to leave. She flees the table under the protective lemon force field of Yolanda Foster. So, now Brandi is blaming all her of her maltreatment of Joyce on a dog? I thought Kim Richards got the dog storyline this season?
Back at the table Joyce is unsympathetic. While Lisa Vanderpump and Ken try to smooth it over, Joyce snaps that Brandi shouldn't act like a "stupid little bitch" if she doesn't want people to confront her. Amen, Joyce, amen. Yolanda returns and is all "but Brandi is very sad". She's having a hard time. Lisa, visibly stressed out, calls for dessert – emotional eating time!