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It's that special time of the season we've been waiting on for what seems like eons…the season finale of Teen Mom 2.  Last night, the girls and their children/parents/boyfriends/users sat down for a two hour chit chat with MTV's resident "therapist" Dr. Drew Pinsky.  Wait…what's that you say?  It wasn't the season finale?  Mid-season finale?  What the–?  I have never heard of such a thing.  You know what this means, right?

Let me break it down for you.  Remember how last week everything wrapped up ever so nicely in the calmest ninety minutes in the show's history?  Jenelle Evans and mom Barbara seemed to be mending their relationship.  Leah Messer Simms Calvert Insert Next Husband's Name Here realized she needed to move on from Corey now that she's pregnant with her new fiance's baby.  Kailyn Lowry began a new romance and was working to co-parent with Jo, and Chelsea Houska finally passed her GED.  Things were in a good place.  

Of course, leave it to MTV to make sure the true finale will be total chaos.  Next week the insanity of broken relationships, drug abuse, and violence spirals out of control when we are treated to the midseason premiere.  I can't keep up, so let's just focus on last night's drama, shall we?  Take it away, Dr. Drew

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It was the _____________ (thanks, Mary!) heard 'round the world when Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' Brandi Glanville called out Adrienne Maloof and Paul Nassif for ______________.  It was very dramatic, not to mention very confusing.  Of course, Paul wasn't bleeped when he accused Brandi of being such a hard partying mom that she neglected her boys by sleeping until 3pm everyday.  How very nocturnal! 

Brandi denied Paul's claims with some more bleeping, and now her former roommate is coming to Brandi's defense to set the record straight.  Brandi's biffle (and a reality star in her own right thanks to Dr. Drew) Jennifer Giminez finds Paul's statement ridiculous, and she's also got some words for Adrienne for calling Brandi a drug addict. 

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MTV aired Amber Behind Bars last night. 

From 16 and Pregnant to Teen Mom… Amber Portwood fell apart right before our eyes. We watched. We screamed. We snarked. We even cried. Well, I know I cried when Leah said to Amber "I need you!" in between sobs and when Amber gave full custody of Leah to Gary Shirley. We sat in stunned silence when Amber chose prison over drug rehab. 

I braced myself for intense feelings of anger and/or sadness, turned on my TV, and listened as Dr. Drew Pinksy interviewed AmberBehind bars. Much to my surprise, I actually found Amber to be likable. Possibly for the first time ever. I also came to respect her decision to enter prison.

Dr. Drew began the interview with, "You're not loaded?!" I giggled and cringed at the same time. "Nope, not loaded, but I feel a little bit nervous," Amber said. 

To recap: Amber has been in prison for four months now. And in therapeutic community, which is like rehab in prison, for two months. Amber admitted she resisted the move into rehab. But they forced her, because she's in prison and doesn't get to make decisions. Dr. Drew asked, "Why prison?"

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I know I can be overly snarky, and I realize that sometimes my sarcasm is too much.  However, I am being dead serious when I say that someone needs to intervene with poor Leah Shirley.  The precious toddler has been the rope that Teen Mom's Amber Portwood and Gary Shirley use to play their crazy game of tug-of-war, and it's so depressing.  I don't doubt they both love their daughter with everything they have, but seriously, this is just too much.

The newest news from this pair stems from a "behind bars" interview that Amber gave to Dr. Drew Pinsky as she serves time for parole violations in an Indiana penitentiary.  I mean, is this man even a real doctor?  I saw a few episodes of "Loveline" back in the day, but should someone who used to pal around with Adam Corolla really be giving advice to incarcerated teenage mothers?  What genius at MTV thought this was a good idea?  These sad people aren't characters or cash cows, but yet…Sorry.  I will step down from my soapbox now. 

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It’s once again time for Dr. Drew Pinsky and his diluted and passive advice to this past season’s crop of 16 & Pregnant girls.  Yes, it’s Life After Labor, y’all, and it’s an hour and a half!  He touts the triumphs and challenges of the most recent teen moms, and, as you all know, we’re treated to quite an emotional video montage.

Briana, who graduated high school a year early (the girl whose sister had an abortion around the same time Briana got pregnant) is first on Dr. Drew’s sofa.  She’s still sporting her adorable cropped haircut.  She’s joined by her mother and sister.  Everyone is crying.  Her mother is devastated, saying it’s not the path she wanted for her daughters.  Her sister seems very defensive when answering Drew’s questions about her abortion.  More tears.  She’s worried her family will feel guilty for her actions.  Briana cries saying she had to give up school, and all of her friends have abandoned her.

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Last night, we bid farewell to the girls of the second Teen Mom…with the help of Dr. Drew of course!

After putting Jenelle Evans and Kailyn Lowry in the hot seat last week, Drew has Chelsea Houska on the sofa. She reveals that her relationship with Adam is civil, but does include hooking up with him, Dr. Drew pronounces it not healthy. Wow. I think I could do his job. After recapping Chelsea’s season, I wish Dr. Drew would ream her for riding on Adam’s motorcycle without a helmet. Instead he applauds her for her accomplishments…which I guess she deserves. He mentions her former friend, Megan, who recently had her baby, and Chelsea is quick to say that she hates that her friend is missing out on her youth like she did.

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It’s the curtain call for the girls of Teen Mom 2, and we can only hope they have learned from their many struggles during the recent installment of the franchise. It’s doubtful, but we can hope! Last night the moms sat down with, the one-and-only, Dr. Drew Pinsky, to discuss the hardships they faced during their sophomore season.

Dr. Drew begins with a recap of the season. Sidebar, are Kailyn and Leah going to the same hairdresser? Their hairstyles are shades of off-white and stark white, respectively. After watching the footage, both are already teary. Kailyn claims she is upset watching her friend get upset. The show has brought the pair closer.

Chelsea reveals that Aubree loves doing her hair and make-up. It appears that maybe Chelsea was sitting a seat over from the blondes in the salon. She has also been visiting Year Round Brown, as she’s very tan. Jenelle expounds on what Chelsea has said about Aubree and Jace…apparently the toddlers are either fighting or making out when they are in the same room. The therapy session cuts to commercial, and of course the first advertisement (of many, I’m sure) introduces the newest teens on 16 and Pregnant. #Depressing.

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As the divorce-annulment drama between Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries heats up, Kris continues to fire back at his wife of 72-days!

A day after filing for annulment on the grounds of fraud, TMZ is now reporting Kris feels he was nothing but a pawn, simply used by Kim for her E! reality show.

Sources tell TMZ Kris feels “he was just slotted in the plot line of Kim Kardashian‘s latest headline and newest business venture.”

TMZ adds that Kris, 26, now believes Kim, 31, never intended to stay married to him and only needed a groom to boost ratings for her show — Kourtney and Kim Take New York. One source states: “Once they were finished taping, she just didn’t need a groom anymore.” Indeed, Kim filed for divorce not during taping of the show but immediately after filming ended.

Kris is reportedly outraged that some of the public believes he was in on the wedding scam. A friend of Kris states, “He would have never flown in his childhood pastor to marry them and involve his church.”

Kris also feels Kim’s own statement (the one she posted on her blog the day she filed for divorce) proves his point. Back on Oct. 31, Kim wrote: “I felt like I was on a fast roller coaster and couldn’t get off when now I know I probably should have. I got caught up in the hoopla and the filming of the TV show.”

And just moments ago, Kim fired back once again at Kris also via TMZ. Kim, err “sources” close to Kim rather tell TMZ Kris’s claims can’t be true because “she and her mom are marketing geniuses, so why would she set herself up to be skewered in the media by dumping her husband after only 72 days?” Folks we can’t make these things up, but my answer to Kimmie is that she and her mother foolishly underestimated the backlash they would receive.

Kim is also telling friends that Kris’ latest move is “pathetic,” adding, “Why fight over any of this?”

Perhaps a reason for Kris’ sudden urge to fight back is this week’s cover of Star magazine and other numerous negative stories the Kardashian camp continues to plant about him in the press… in hopes of making him a villain and Kim a victim.

On this week’s Star cover (posted below), sources close to Kim claim the marriage fell apart because Kris is gay and apparently refused to touch her after their honeymoon. Yes they went there. Even better, this comes just weeks after the same sources were claiming Kris cheated on Kim with other women. A rep for Kris, however, denies the tabloid rumor telling the NY Post that Star Magazine’s story is “completely false and ridiculous. He is not gay.”

It appears the Kardashians continue to remain desperate to paint Kim as a victim as pretty much all of their previous attempts have failed. This includes the premiere episode of KKTNY which actually backfired as it showed Kris as being in love with his wife, while Kim was rather short with him.

In fact, Kim’s actions on that episode is also causing some new drama. See in one of the scenes, Kris ends up ruining Kim’s pedicure while roughhousing with her and a very annoyed Kim punches him in retaliation. Dr. Drew Pinsky who saw the footage stated that he considered Kim’s actions to be domestic abuse. Wowzers.

“What you are seeing there is domestic violence,” said Dr. Drew as he played the clip for his “Lifechangers” audience to see. “A lot of people watching this may not understand this, and I get that. It looks playful. What’s the big deal? It is a massive deal and it’s important.”

Dr. Drew added that his main concern was the message Kim’s actions are sending to viewers. “It’s important for everyone else,” he said. “For Kris and Kim, they’re separating. That’s over with. This doesn’t need to be reported or anything, but anybody listening at home and viewing this has to understand the spectrum of domestic violence, and this is incontrovertible evidence of someone engaged in a domestic violence relationship.”

He also added that Kim’s actions shouldn’t be excused due to her small size compared to NBA player Kris. “It’s illegal, and it goes to a bad place,” he stressed. “It progresses. It starts and goes — it doesn’t stay right there. The size, gender does not matter. It goes to a horrible, horrible place.”

Interesting. Did Kim cross the line with her punch? We’ll let you be the judge. The clip of the punch is below.

[Photo credit: SPLASH]

TELL US – DO YOU BELIEVE KIM USED KRIS? DO YOU AGREE WITH DR. DREW? DID KIM CROSS THE LINE BY PUNCHING KRIS?

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