Last night's episode of Real Housewives of Orange County was giving me flashbacks of the Bill Clinton trial. It was all a buncha semantics, except with Housewives mumbo-jumbo. "I did not say they were having sex, they were just in bed." "I didn't say it was a threesome" "I've never had multiple partners." "You have a different guest role on Malibu Country." Whatever the case: "Uh Oh! Somebody's lyyyyyying!" (Adrienne Maloof voice).
Lydia McLaughlin tried to take her new friends to her old country, Canada, for some good old fashion skiing fun at Whistler. Truly showing she's a sparkly-eyed, pixie winged novice for all things Housewives she predicted it would be drama free. Why? Did she think the negative temperatures would freeze their drama capacitors off? Nope, if anything the cold made them extra twitchy and jumpy and turned the trip into a true The Shining nightmare. Except Lydia was the only person trapped on the mountain and unable to escape.
Good thing Alexis Bellinogave Lydia a special, drama-debunking gift! Alexis has decided she'll come on the trip under one condition – she can carry a concealed weapon. A Swaorvski crystal studded bible! Alexis gives Lydia a matching bible. Um… I love these two; they truly are Jesus Barbie and her little sister Bible Skipper! I hope Barbie doesn't wear Alexis Couture to teach Sunday School.
The first caller asks 'how could Gretchen not think Lauri was insinuating a threesome?' Lauri defended herself, "I was very clear that when I walked into the room, they were just under the covers. I couldn't see what they were doing. It wasn't the first time, it was the second time, same people. I didn't want to say that it was a sexual relationship because I didn't know. So I made it very clear to her at the time. I wanted her to make sure that I wasn't positive."
The Real Housewives of Orange County star shares her hot body secrets and no surprise it involves junk food deprivation (laaaame!) and exercises (laaaamer!). Didn't Lydia McLaughlin accuse her of not eating?
Gretchen says her road to body acceptance and health has been difficult. “I’ve struggled in the past with having an eating disorder way back in the day in high school and going through yoyo dieting and trying every pill on the market," Gretchen confesses to RadarOnline. "But none of it worked [because] I wasn’t feeding my body or taking care of myself." Wasn't this Alexis' storyline already?
And Heather does not condone drama among zillion dollar wedding gowns, pulling focus away from TAMRA'S DAY or lying about your professed acting gigs. So not kosher! Fancy Pants calls out several of the ladies of RHOC for forgetting their manners and for having trouble with the truth.
SoTamra Barney is once again on the warpath where Gretchen Rossi is concerned. Who is she going to phone at the reunion this year? Did she take the friendship bracelet back?
Of course Gretchen may not deserve Tamra's friendship after all the lies and manipulations she's been attempting to dish out this season, which is exactly what Tamra takes issue with in her latest Real Housewives of Orange County blog!
Tamrawrites aboutGretchen's ever-changing truths and point-blank calls her a liar with regard to Alexis Bellino being invited dress shopping and her alleged role on Malibu Country. Tamra also wonders about why Gretchen was so desperate for attention she tried to make bridal shopping all about her. Ummm… maybe because Gretch was supposed to get that wedding spinoff first?
Poor Gretchen Rossi has once again found herself on the receiving end of Tamra Barney's "Wrath of Furry" (which is ironic considering Tamra was wearing a wrap of furry this episode)! Bet Gretch figured she'd never end up there again after all her groveling and BFF espousing, but alas a leopard doesn't change its spots!
This week the Real Housewives of Orange County star got a firsthand glimpse of just how flimsy her friendship with Tamra is when she threw her under the proverbial bus for Alexis Bellino and then talked ish about her to everyone who would listen.
In her latest Bravo blog, Gretchen explains her feelings on seeing Tamra's true colors, once again, and defends herself against accusations that she was giving Tamra an ultimatum concerning Alexis and that she lied about her role on Malibu Country. Read on – warning: it's a biggun!
CONTINUE READING FOR GRETCHEN'S LONG-WINDED TIRADE!
A few beautiful wedding dresses can make anything better! Even a limo full of badly behaving Real Housewives of Orange County. Yep, I like even Tamra Barney better when she's all stuffed into a stunning white gown. Maybe because I can imagine the fabric drowning out her voice.
So last night was another infamous Tamra Starts Getting Married episode. After she decided to be the the bigger girl and invite Alexis Bellino to her ultimate special dress shopping extravaganza for trip down the aisle numero tres, friction between Gretchen Rossi who like totally thought she was the numero uno in importance, arose. Tamra no likey.
Tamra meets finace Eddie for dinner at their gym which is still basically an abandoned warehouse at this point and Tamra is wearing some sort of animal hide cape. Seriously – what was that thing Cruella DeVille? I thought Tamra only killed and skinned other housewives. Silence of the Implants!
I know I'm supposed to have pity for reality TV stars for the stressful lives they live – and the chaos of having their every moment captured on camera. All the flaws, and bad behavior, and embarrassing moments, and fights, and crappy relationships, and friendships gone awry. Yeah, I should probably feel bad for them. But I don't! I'm callous that way.