Let's get started with the stupidity, shall we? Chelsea's friend comes by to visit, and Chelsea whines that her IUD fell out the other day when she was going to the bathroom. TMI. Her friend inquires as to whether Chelsea saw her doctor, but Chelsea didn't have time…Adam came over to see her for the first time in ages. Not shockingly, they pair ends up getting it on…sans condom, of course. Don't worry, y'all. She won't get pregnant because he pulled out before finishing. TMITMITMITMI!!!! I wonder how she thinks Aubree came to be…Her friend urges her to make better choices, and Chelsea whines that she doesn't have her normal "giddy for Adam" feelings. That's definitely something to be proud of as you await your period, moron!
At least Kailyn is making better choices, right? Oh wait…no. She gets upset that Jo's girlfriend is over at his house when she drops off Isaac, and she and Jo get into a physical altercation that ends with her filing for a temporary order of protection from abuse. Violence is not the answer, but I will never understand her double standard of allowing Javi around Isaac after one date while Jo's serious girlfriend is a problem. Kailyn's friend Mark (who is totally in love with her) comes over to hear her story. Mark tries to give her some sound advice, but she won't listen. I can't believe the language she uses in front of her son. Kailyn explains that she'll have temporary full custody until their hearing in two weeks. Mark just seems totally befuddled at his friend's behavior.
It's that special time of the season we've been waiting on for what seems like eons…the season finale of Teen Mom 2. Last night, the girls and their children/parents/boyfriends/users sat down for a two hour chit chat with MTV's resident "therapist" Dr. Drew Pinsky. Wait…what's that you say? It wasn't the season finale? Mid-season finale? What the–? I have never heard of such a thing. You know what this means, right?
Of course, leave it to MTV to make sure the true finale will be total chaos. Next week the insanity of broken relationships, drug abuse, and violence spirals out of control when we are treated to the midseason premiere. I can't keep up, so let's just focus on last night's drama, shall we? Take it away, Dr. Drew!
So, we are in the midst of what may be the longest stint of Teen Mom 2 in the history of the world. Last night's "mid-season finale" was even ninety minutes long…because it takes a long time to bid farewell to Jenelle Evans, Leah Messer Calvert, Chelsea Houska, and Kailyn Lowry. Not that they will be gone for long…we'll be treated to a two-hour reunion special next Monday, and then another twelve episode arc starts the week afterwards. That's when the true crazy is going to begin!
Last night's episode begins with a phone call from Jeremy. Leah, shocked she got pregnant so quickly (must I remind her of her first date with Corey?), has yet to tell him the good news. Jeremy is also in disbelief that it happened so fast, but he's nervous and excited. Leah commends Jeremy on waiting until he was the ripe old age of twenty-three to have a child…not sixteen like she was.
Chelsea is taking Aubree to check out day cares in the event she passes her GED and gets to start "hair school." Man, she's even whiny when questioning the day care instructor! The director calms her fears regarding leaving Aubree for the first time and stresses the need for Aubree to socialize at this age. Chelsea smacks her gum in agreement.
Kailyn is prepping for Isaac's second birthday and spending a lot of time with Javi. Why are guys drawn to her blunt sarcasm? Javi wonders if he'll ever get out of the friend zone. Kailyn assures him that being invited to Isaac's party is a good sign. Meanwhile, Jo and his new girlfriend are discussing how well Jo and Kailyn have been co-parenting lately. They are, however, having separate parties for their son. Jo wants Kailyn to meet his girlfriend, and his girlfriend thinks that Kailyn would want to know who is hanging around her son. She offers to write Kailyn a letter to break the ice.
Is it just me, or do these girls get dumber the longer this season of Teen Mom 2 continues? It's like, they do something stupid, and I'm convinced that they can't top their own stupidity, and then BAM! The next episode happens, and they've proven me wrong. Case in point…on last night's episode, Leah Messer Calvert took out her IUD because she wants her kids to be close in age. Pay no attention to the fact that at this point she's only known Jeremy for two months. Jenelle Evans admits she slept with her best friend's boyfriend around the time she got pregnant, so she doesn't know for certain who Jace's father is. Chelsea Houska was more concerned about Adam's twenty-first birthday than studying for her GED, and Kailyn Lowry brought yet another dude into Isaac's life. I can't wait to see what they have in store for us next week!
After the twins' birthday party, Leah drops off the twins with Corey. He's lamenting (well, not really…he's be lamenting if he knew what it meant) about what to get the girls for their birthday since they already have every toy under the sun. Leah tells him she got them a Barbie jeep before riding off into the sunset for a romantic getaway with Jeremy. They head up to a cabin in the mountains, and Leah is blown away by the coziness of it all. Plus, there's a hot tub! Jeremy sneakily hides what I'm assuming is an engagement ring in a vase in the den. I'm just glad these crazy kids are taking it slow.
Jo has Isaac for the weekend, and Kailyn has a date with Javi. I'm getting that Kailyn's favorite restaurant is a diner. Javi is studying criminal justice in school, and he wants to be a cop. They flirt, eat, and cut to the chase as far as dating, Isaac, and Jo are concerned. Seriously, what is up with these girls throwing themselves into relationships? It's a breakfast date, not an interview for a spouse.
We are now officially ten episodes into this season of Teen Mom 2, and I worry that there is no end in sight. All of the girls seem to be mirroring each other's behavior. Jenelle Evans moves, then Leah Messer moves. Jenelle drops out of school, Leah drops out of school. Kailyn Lowry gets a new place, Chelsea Houska wants a fenced-in backyard. I guess I should be glad that they are all pretty interchangeable, right?
Kailyn has decided against moving to Texas to be fair to Jo. He is excited to hear that she plans to stay in Pennsylvania. She informs him that when her lease is up, she plans to look for another home about twenty minutes away. Does Jo minds driving twenty minutes back and forth to see his son? Um, I think Jo is glad that he doesn't have to travel back and forth to Texas! While Jo has Isaac, Kailyn decides to go bowling with Gigi and some of her friends. Kailyn is paired up with Gigi's friend Javi, and she thinks he's really cute…cute enough to marry?
Lord have mercy! I sometimes think that Teen Mom 2 would be easier to watch if I didn't know what was going on with these girls' lives now. Jenelle Evans seems to be hitting rock bottom this season, but we know it only gets worse. Kailyn Lowry is now engaged even though on the show she's still pining over Jo after duping poor Jordan. Leah Messer is remarried with a third baby on the way (although I do like watching her and Corey try to work through their relationship…it helps me reconcile their divorce as being the best decision for both of them), and Chelsea Houska…well, she's still pretty much what you see is what you get…a lot of whining, feathers, and mascara!
Let's get to last night's episode, shall we? Why does Chelsea need to put on fake eyelashes to take her GED tests? I guess they take some of the focus off of those feathers. Aubree has a meltdown as her mom flies off in a bleached haze. Meanwhile Kailyn is leaving Isaac with Jo and his family so she can go to Texas to reconnect with some family. When she arrives in Austin, her cousin is there to meet her at the airport. Austin is definitely on my bucket list. Kailyn reveals that things are stagnant in Pennsylvania because she screwed herself out of a boyfriend.
While Jenelle is back on her bipolar meds, she is still having mood swings. She hopes that she's able to prove to mom Barbara that she's stable enough to be a positivie part of Jace's life. Jenelle shares with a friend that, like, you know, she thinks she may have moved in with Josh, like, you know, too soon. Um, you think? I mean, she waited a week after dating before taking the plunge! Now she realizes, like, you know, that he's totally immature and thinks everything is funny when it's not. Boys! Jenelle also wants to get back custody of Jace before her mom totally dominates his life. Barbara like wants to like raise him the way she thinks is best, you know? Why yes, it's called having his best interests at heart and not taking off to a Ke$ha concert instead of being a mom.
Last time on Teen Mom 2, Leah Messer and Jeremy Calvert made their relationship official. Kailyn Lowry dumped Jordan in favor of getting back togeher with Jo Rivera, while Chelsea Houska agreed to give therapy a try in order to (finally!) get over Adam Lind. Finally, Jenelle Evans managed to avoid jail time after failing a drug test and met a new guy, Josh.
For reasons unknown, MTV decided to air Teen Mom 2 on Christmas Eve and began with Chelsea. Said in my best whiny Chelsea voice… uh-ugh…. Chelsea brings her orange skin, raccoon eyes, bleached-to-death hair, and frosty lips to the nail salon. Luckily, Chelsea and mom Mary have both removed their hair feathers, so there's room in the car for Aubree. Thank goodness for small favors. For a while there, I expected to see the hair feathers listed in the opening credits.
I'm elated Aubree comes to the nail salon. She is adorable and makes Chelsea's scenes bearable. I digress. While Chelsea, Mary, and Aubree get manicures, Chelsea announces that she's dropping out of therapy. She doesn't think she needs to go because the therapist didn't tell her anything she doesn't already know. Chelsea is all like, Everything she told me about boundaries and healthy and unhealthy relationships, I've already heard from every other person in my life. Basically, Chelsea doesn't want one more person – a person with a "dishing out advice" degree to boot – telling her that Ad-dumm is no good for her.
We begin as Leah and Jeremy make it official after her first motorcycle ride. When he asks about what went wrong with Corey to which she replies, "He did some things, I did some things." Jeremy doesn't care. He couldn't be happier that he sent that Facebook friend request!
Chelsea's friend has encouraged her to see a therapist. Chelsea isn't ready to give up Adam, but she admits to having issues with depression and low self-esteem before Adam ever came along.
Jenelle is passing all of her drug tests, and she's back in school. She has lunch with her mom Barbara, and she admits that she's stopped taking her bi-polar meds. Barbara wants Jenelle to make a doctor's appointment to refill her prescription which Jenelle says she'll do "when she has time." We all know how that turns out, don't we? She admits to her mother that she's going to hang out with a new guy. Barbara thinks that a new skinny kid is exactly what her daughter needs to take her mind off of Kieffer. She praises Jenelle's more responsible attitude and agrees to let her take Jace to Myrtle Beach for the day.
When Jo comes to pick up Isaac, Kailyn is crying over Jordan. He tries to console her by telling her any guy that would stand her up isn't worth the tears. Poor Jo. He can't win for losing.