OK, Shahs of Sunset fans (and haters), we had one whole week to recover from Mike Shouhed finally admitting to cheating on estranged wife, Jessica Parido, during vacation in Belize with the rest of the Shahs. While none of us viewers were really surprised, I wasn’t sure how this would play out on the show and was a little annoyed at Bravo for making me wait a whole additional week to find out. As if the local fireworks were even close to as entertaining as the fireworks going off within this group of numnuts!
As we rejoin the Shahs in Belize the next morning, Asa Soltan Rahmati and Reza Farahan are catching up on how the night ended. Asa reveals that after seeing Mike unravel, she went out clubbing with GG Gharachedaghi and Shervin Roohparvar, dancing until the wee morning hours. This fuels Reza’s assumption that GG is faking her rheumatoid arthritis. He’s also not done being two-faced and meddling in Mike’s marital business and slimes his way over to Mike’s room to tell him that he supports him. Mike falls for the fakeness and expresses gratitude that his friends are always there for him, even in bad times.
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The group decides to go horseback riding to some Mayan ruins and Mercedes “MJ” Javid thought stiletto heels would be an appropriate shoe to wear for such an occasion. Nice try, MJ, but wearing stilettos isn’t going to make you appear any more glamorous as your sweat your way through your tank top and hair extensions on the back of a horse.
Once they arrive at the ruins, everyone starts climbing the steps and GG, full of booze and misplaced anger, lags behind and complains that the group isn’t compassionate to the fact that her RA is holding her back from climbing at a normal pace. Given the amount of drinking, partying and ceviche-eating the Shahs have done on this trip, I’m surprised ANY of them are moving at more than a turtle’s pace up those stairs! After a few spiritual epiphanies at the top, everyone heads down on a steep slope, which was no easy feat. Ever the wordsmith, Tommy Feight says he was so scared, he almost “peed like a girl”. Whatever that means.
As everyone sits down to cool off at the bottom, Asa asks GG if she would be willing to pose for her dumb series of couples photographs, musing that even though GG is single, she fits into the narrative of what it means to be a couple. Asa might have gotten a little too high off the spiritual realness at the top of that Mayan temple – what the eff is she talking about?
Reza has no problem pointing this out and asks Asa why he’s taking a picture of GG by herself, which quickly escalates to a screaming match between him and GG. Clearly, this wasn’t the real issue at hand but Reza is just sick of GG and her toxicity in general. He meanly mocks her RA (not cool) and also reminds her that she has issues with everyone (fair and accurate). GG won’t back down and says that if Reza can’t support her in a positive way, then he shouldn’t be consumed with bringing her down in a negative one. That’s actually a pretty well made point but we all know that if Reza actually did that, it would make him a decent human being, which he is not.
Later that night, the group sits down to a private dinner at the resort and not even a platter of ceviche can break the ice. GG is in full hot-mess mode and slurry from mixing pills and too much wine. When the talk turns to Mike and his relationship issues, GG announces this conversation is too boring for her
since it’s not about her and angrily stumbles off to have another cigarette. Cousin Nima joins her to try and talk some sense into her but to no avail. GG stumbles off to bed while the rest of the group ends the night as well. That’s a wrap for this group trip and I’m sure the entire country of Belize can relax and replenish their ceviche supply now that the Shahs are gone.
Back in LA, MJ wants to help Mike, who says he is trying to get Jessica back because she is family and you don’t give up on family. You know what you also don’t do to family? CHEAT ON THEM. MJ takes him to a flower shop and he picks out a large quantity of roses to send to Jessica, none of which will change the fact that he’s a cheating scumbag.
GG goes to visit her parents, tell them about her trip to Belize and defensively complain about her RA. GG says she is in too much pain and needs to do chemo but GG’s mom disagrees. She thinks GG should try being more strict with her diet for an extended time period and GG gets angry instead of even attempting to hear her poor mother out. Let me spare you the rest but basically, GG says she is tired – tired of not sleeping and being a bitch all the time because she is in pain. Her words, not mine, people. I’m pretty tired too – tired of GG and her tantrums.
Over to Reza’s condo, which looks more like the set of a 70s game show than an apartment, Adam Neely is happy to have his husband back from his trip. Reza is busy working on his jokes (SNORT) and reading them to his dog, who has the same reaction as the rest of us, which is uncomfortable silence.
Although Reza bombed at the Improv, his ego won’t let him admit that he just isn’t funny, so it’s time for him to stink up another venue. God, I feel so bad for the audience that paid money to get into this comedy club. A few comedians get up and do a great job because well, they are actually funny….and then Reza gets up. Not only are his jokes not funny, but having a whole routine centered around the fact that he’s Persian, but insisting on speaking in an over exaggerated, stereotypical urban accent is downright offensive. When exactly does Reza talk like that any other time? Surely not when he’s talking about how much money he spends on gold and cars. Finally, he tells a joke that supposedly wins over the crowd but I’m not convinced and think that was just pity editing on the show’s part.
After that mess, we are treated to another one: GG and her doctor’s appointment to get chemo for her RA. GG has her whole family and some friends there to support her while she sits in the chair getting an IV drip for six hours. One of those friends being Anita Gohari, who GG previously crapped all over in past seasons, but is now a good enough friend to sit through her chemo treatments. As GG wearily rolls her head while sitting in the chair getting treatment, the doctor comes in to make sure everything is going well.
Asa uses this opportunity to ask the doctor about the care GG is receiving and he clarifies that it is the same chemotherapy a cancer patient would use, but a different level and therefore, specifically used for RA and types of lymphoma. Asa asks what GG can do to help herself get better and when he says she can stop smoking, the head drooping/all around weariness stops and GG is suddenly wide awake, alert and back to her nasty, defensive self. As GG jumps out of the chair with the energy of someone who cares more about the appearances of treatment as opposed to the actual treatment itself, the doctor scurries away from the drama. Asa tries to talk to GG about quitting smoking but it’s pointless. GG doesn’t want to, so that’s the end of that and this episode.
TELL US – WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON – GG OR REZA? DO YOU THINK REZA’S JOKES ARE FUNNY?
Photo Credit: Bravo