Don't Be Tardy recap

With six kids, a chef, and more dogs than I can keep track of, it’s safe to say that Kim Zolciak Biermann and Kroy Biermann like to live in excess. Last night’s episode of Don’t Be Tardy highlights, underlines, and throws a bunch of exclamation points on that excess as we watch Kim continue to push for one more kid, but maybe settle for a puppy instead.

The idea originally pops up thanks to resident daughter/assistant/unofficial Fit Tea sales rep, Brielle. While Kash and KJ adorably wreck the kitchen in an attempt to cook something, Brielle, who previously stated that their house was like a daycare, mentions that it’s time for another dog. Brielle’s highly interested in cross-breeding two dogs until Tracey points out how many dogs are stuck in shelters and need good homes. Brielle doesn’t seem thrilled but will take what she can get and production Tracey pulls a few strings to arrange for the family to volunteer over the weekend.


Don't Be Tardy recap

Brielle might be pushing for another dog, but she also has a secret and that secret happens to have a snout and makes oinking noises. No, she hasn’t nabbed a new man on Bumble, she actually has a pig that she received from her friends as a recent birthday gift (kids these days). Brielle has been hiding her pig, aptly named Chester Jorge, at her friend’s house because she hasn’t told Kim and Kroy yet. She’s waiting for the right moment to bring Chester Jorge out of the shadows and into the chaos that is the Biermann home and I guess that day is coming.

Don't Be Tardy recap

But first, let’s see what’s going on with Kim’s unofficial seventh baby, her skin care line, Kashmere. Unbeknownst to anyone else, this is a line she has been working on for “years” and was conceived when she was pregnant and didn’t want stretch marks. Instead of just buying some lotion and calling it a day like most women, Kim and Kroy played mad scientists and cooked it up in their kitchen because they need some kind of backstory to sell this crap.

Even though Kim can’t decide on how stripper-y it should smell, she is pleased with how the bottles turned out and can’t wait to share Kashmere with the world. I’m sure the world can’t wait either.

Finally, the Biermanns head off to the shelter with Kim protesting that there is no way they are getting a dog (which means they are totally getting a dog).

Don't Be Tardy recap

Turns out, they came under the premise of “volunteering” and while Kroy keeps using terms like “give back”, their charity is restricted to simply petting the puppies. Kroy, I don’t think “giving back” is what you think it means. Either way, Kim falls in love with a little black lab but Kroy puts his foot down (hey, charity only goes so far) and Kim is forced to actually give back… the puppy, that is. They leave empty handed. Or so they think. The next day, Brielle shows up with the puppy, now named Norma Jean. Kroy insists she take care of it and Brielle barely pretends to listen, already distracted on Snapchat.

Kroy and Kim head to the reproductive specialist, who has an office equipped with jelly beans and coloring books to keep them busy while they wait. The doctor starts to explain his thoughts for treatment and says he wouldn’t bother freezing Kim’s eggs but rather freezing the whole embryo right off the bat. Kim announces that for once, she hasn’t turned to google to get any info and relies on the doctor to explain it, but both she and Kroy quickly glaze over while the doctor explains some pretty important details. Ahh, to already have six healthy kids and any fertility treatment at your disposal and not even have to bother with listening to the details… that is the life Kim is leading, folks. Don’t sweat the small stuff after a stroke, right?

As they drive home, Kim decides she is going to start with testing how many eggs she has but freaks out at the idea of donating any eggs or embryos she doesn’t use to someone in need. Naturally.

Don't Be Tardy recap

It’s time for Chester Jorge to come home. Brielle shows up with him and Kim immediately notices two things: his butt is very red and it looks like he has high heels on. But that’s not enough to get Kim on board this time and she tells Brielle the pig can’t stay. Brielle doesn’t seem to care at all and instead, says she will just take the pig back to her friend’s house. Guess you can’t put lipstick, or in this case, high heels on a pig, and Chester Jorge has to go live with some other rich family.


Photo Credit: Bravo


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