Don't Be Tardy recap

This week’s episode of Don’t Be Tardy is ripe with all kinds of change in the air. Kim Zolciak Biermann and Kroy Biermann are anxiously waiting to hear where Kroy will end up playing and the whole family is a tad on edge with the unknown. The only solution seems to be to throw money at the problem, which sounds about right.

Despite the stress going on around her, Tracey is cool as a cucumber, thanks to a new online relationship with a gal named Lexi. She met her on Instagram and apparently, knows almost nothing about her, even though they have been talking for a month and a half. Lexi lives in New York and Tracey has yet to join the year 2016 FaceTime her. Brielle Biermann expertly points out that Tracey is “SO old” and decides to move this relationship along with a FaceTime call. One fun fact Tracey forgot to ask in her relationship is how old Lexi is (25) and both Brielle and Tracey are shocked by this news but recover quickly enough to invite Lexi to Atlanta to see this sh*t show first hand spend some much needed time together.


Don't Be Tardy recap

Ariana and Brielle are decidedly less calm and are taking swipes at each other nonstop. Some of Arriana’s choice insults for Brielle are that she’s a “Snapchat whore” and a mini version of Kim (ouch). Brielle accuses Ariana of being a “basic b**ch” for her choice in sneakers and only caring about herself. As her two oldest daughters trade jabs and smack each other with overpriced pillows, Kim sits passively, her full face of makeup refusing to register more than a tiny bemused grin. This is sisterly stuff. Kim knows they still love each other. Also, she doesn’t want to get her weave knocked off.

Kroy and Kim call a family meeting and have to preface it by reassuring everyone off the bat that Kim is not pregnant. Kroy announces it’s time to have a family day at a local funplex and no one cares until Kroy announces that whoever wins the most points from each activity gets a thousand dollars. At this point I can’t tell if Kroy just loves to show off his money, thoroughly enjoys wasting his money, or he really just doesn’t think his family can function without a cash incentive. Either way, yuck to this whole offer. I know rich people function in a whole different world but in the real world, a whole day at a funplex with your family IS the reward.

Don't Be Tardy recap

Once at the funplex, the Biermanns do go karting, bowling, and then a pretty suspect looking tightrope walk that I’m hoping is up to code. Sporty Spice Ariana (who keep in mind, is fifteen years old) easily wins the thousand dollars. Brielle wants money just for showing up. Sigh. Moving on, Tracey announces over food that her girlfriend is coming to town and she’s putting her up in a hotel instead of having her stay at her house. I didn’t realize Tracey actually had a house of her own. Here I was thinking she camped out in guest bedroom she shared with all the prototypes of Kim’s old wig line.

Brielle and her friend Zach are taking a nervous Tracey to pick up Lexi at whatever Motel 6 she put her up at. They all go out to dinner and I’m not sure why Tracey thought bringing two teenagers along to her dinner date would be a good idea. But that seems to be the least of Tracey’s bad date judgement since she leads the conversation with asking Lexi what she thinks about open relationships because “seventy percent of all marriages end in divorce unless they are in an open relationship.” Not sure where Tracey gets her statistical information but I’m one hundred percent sure that’s inaccurate. Brielle tries to steer the ship back on course and tells Lexi how wonderful Tracey is. An unmoved Lexi stares blankly until it’s her turn to talk and asks if Tracey and Brielle are going to date. Call me a pessimist, but I’m going to chalk this whole visit up as a loss.

Don't Be Tardy

The next day, as Kim gets a full face of contour, Tracey fills her in on how the date went and Kim agrees that Lexi isn’t the right person for her. It’s probably for the best – Tracey will have to work overtime cooking for all the stress eating that’s going on in the Biermann house as they continue to wait for word on Kroy’s next contract. Bananas Foster for all!


Photo Credit: Bravo