Farrah Abraham makes her triumphant return to Teen Mom tonight, and I, for one, couldnât be happier. Sheâs not the most sane person ever, but her special brand of delusional crazy entertains me while her Teen Mom OG co-stars, Maci Bookout, Catelynn Lowell, and Amber Portwood, bore me to tears.
So, bring on the crazy, which was on full display in a recent podcast with Shane Dawson. When Shane pointed out that Farrah seems oblivious to her cult following, Farrah said, âI donât think Iâm big into cults. That is why.â Even Shane, a self-proclaimed super fan, couldnât help but bust out laughing at Farrah.
CLICK CONTINUE READING FOR MORE!
Shane admitted that he hates âall those Teen Mom girlsâ with the exception of the âone who punched her husbandâs head into the wall.â Farrah assumed he was talking about Amber. (Could be Teen Mom 2âs Kail Lowry too!) When someone called Amber âthe big one,â Farrah said, âOh, sheâs much littler. You know what? Itâs me, Amber, and then everybody else is bigger than us now.â
About that fact that Teen Mom OG shunned Farrah until production began and the producers realized the other three are duller than dirt, Farrah shared, âWell, like, the executives who had to call and say, âWeâre so sorry for letting you go. How funny is this? We had to ask you to come back.â Well then they had to kind of show that they made the wrong choice at first.â Check out the clip below to see how that went down.
Shane asked, âHow does that feel?â Farrah said, âI rejoice every day.â
When asked if she played hard to get at all, Farrah said, âNo, because they already, like, seriously apologized because they know with me I donât take bullsh-t when itâs at a serious level. Because when they initially called, before anyone knew I wasnât back, they initially called and said, âHey, weâre going to be moving forward without you.â And they wanted, like, some dramatic cry-ass reaction from me, and Iâm not that type of a person. âIâm pretty much, like, been through so much sh-t. I wish you all the best and Iâm gonna still throw a premiere party and still enjoy it.â Which I did! When Teen Mom OG came out, I still had a party at my house, and, like, I was fine. And I think lifeâs great.â
Farrah said sheâs âOKâ around her co-stars, who have been very vocal about her, um, career choices and return to the show, because itâs just part of show business. âSh-t, I donât even deal with it,â continued Farrah. âI just have lived amongst it and they can all eat my sh-t.â
About attending the MTV Movie Awards with Catelynn and Amber, she said, âI thought I looked amazing. I shine so I donât care. Honestly, though, I think with everyone who is successful and who does work hard, I think that speaks for itself. So I could be around a bunch of all the things Iâve been around and I still do what I want.â
Shane surmised that Amber, Maci, and Catelynn are afraid of Farrah. âI think maybe thatâs what it is,â agreed Farrah. âI think you say it better for me because I donât even take the time to understand it anymore. Just because I love how people can act like they can make money and provide for their families when really Iâve made the way for them. And I think thatâs why.â
HAHAHA! Newsflash Farrah⌠everyone says things better than you! HAHAHA!
About the updated look of Teen Mom, Farrah said, âSo, they kind of merged, like, The Housewives show with the Teen Mom show because weâre getting older. And I guess some of the Teen Moms are trying to be housewives, but it doesnât really work out because their husbands arenât successful, you know?â Shane pointed out that none of her co-stars are married, to which Farrah said, âYou know what? Good fâking point! I give them too much credit. They are not even married.â Farrahâs comparison to Real Housewives makes no sense since the Teen Moms donât film together. But, Farrah.
About Catelynn and Tylerâs second baby and Maciâs pregnancy, Farrah said, âThe did keep it. Not an adoption this time. Well you now what? We were coming back, and well, what are we going to come to if no oneâs getting pregnant again? And then you have Maci, who is pregnant right now. Sheâs been pregnant this whole season and still pregnant right now. The pregnancies â I donât even know if theyâre real babies because no oneâs popping out babies! Theyâre just continually pregnant!â
Farrah went on to say that sheâs set to appear on two reality shows in the future: one is on E!, which is most likely Botched because of that lip implant fiasco, and one is âthe biggestâ show in the UK. Shane assumed Celebrity Big Brother and tried to get Farrah to spill the beans. That went like this:
Shane: I have a big brother named Jared. He is my favorite big brother. I watch him every summer.
Farrah: Is he on â heâs Subway! Subway, eat fresh. No, Frocoâs not like Subway.
Shane: Well, if you were to drop your boyfriend and get with my brother Jared then technically you would be on my big brother.
Farrah: Iâm not getting on your big brother.
Shane: Youâre not?
Farrah: I have a boyfriend. I donât know what twisted incestual sh-t this isâŚ
Shane: Nevermind⌠I was trying to guess⌠Big Brother UK. Thatâs my favorite show of all time.
When Farrah said her show is bigger and Shane insisted Big Brother is the biggest, she teased, âMaybe itâs something new that you just havenât heard of thatâs bigger.â
A shout out and thank you to Starcasm for transcribing these quotes from the podcast for our reading pleasure â and you can listen to the podcast in its entirety on Shane and Friends.
Teen Mom airs tonight at 10 PM EST on MTV. Reality Tea will be live tweeting all the drama. Join us.
TELL US â ARE YOU EXCITED ABOUT FARRAHâS RETURN TO TEEN MOM?
Photo Credit: Allen Berezovsky/Getty Images