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brandi-glanville-lisa-vanderpump

Aaaaahhh… Brandi Glanville. Never a quiet moment, eh! 

In her most recent podcast the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star accuses her former friend of being just as much a valley girl as she once was!

“On our show, there are certain people who want to project this perfect persona like there’s nothing wrong in the world,” Brandi said. “Like Lisa Vanderpump used to live deep in the Valley and was filing for bankruptcy — and she doesn’t want to talk about that. That’s interesting to me.”

Exactly what is wrong with being broke, working hard to earn money, and then moving up? If Lisa got herself out of bankruptcy and is now financially solvent how is that anyone's business? Oh is because Lisa didn't act like a complete trashbox in the process like Drunki

Sigh. Grasping at cocktail straw, Brandi, grasping at cocktail straws and slurping up alll the vodka. 

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couples-therapy-farrah-1

Last night on Couples Therapy the brilliant professionalism that is Dr. Jenn Berman explored *gasp* secrets. Secrets soooo big, and soooo deep, and soooo like secrety that the cameras had to be turned off on Farrah Abraham so Farrah could secret in secret. And also scrunch up her face while stage whispering, aka cry. 

Other than that, Ghostface's secret girlfriend Latrice came to the house to discover that Ghost also has a secret girlfriend named Kelsey. In the world of Ghost this is just how he gets his mack on, in the world of the rest of us, Ghost should just give up the ghost and accept that he's a middle-aged man with a midlife crisis. Oh, did I say that out loud? Cause I wish Dr. Jenn would have! Basically what I'm saying here is that last night's Couples Therapy was about one singular sensation who no one would ever date and one menage-a-trois dysfunctional relationship. So like where the couples at?

No one likes Farrah. I mean of course not – she makes condescending snarky comments to everyone, walks around with her fake nose in the air, and acts like it's all their faults she's a liar. Also everyone sees through her. Taylor Armstrong slurs that the "floral skirts with ballet flats aren't fooling me." Exactly how is Taylor getting sloshed every night "therapeutic"? 

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DirectTV's 'Super Saturday Night' Super Bowl party - Arrivals

With the insane season finale of Vanderpump Rules revealing a salacious "banging" and a ton of lies, Stassi Schroeder says that she fled the toxicity of SUR and moved to New York City where she now lives with her new boyfriend Patrick. 

Stassi shockingly expresses no desire to return to the show which made her mean girl ways infamous. Stassi no longer works at SUR, of course, and because duh! she's so much more special than just being the princess of cocktail slinging! 

"I just realized that my life was just so toxic. Like, everything was so toxic. No one was a good friend, besides Katie [Maloney], obviously," Stassi reveals to Hollywood Life about her decision to quit. "I just needed to take myself out of that environment. I can’t be a waitress forever. Come on, eventually we were all going to start moving on." That does not confirm that she's leaving reality TV behind!

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farrah-abraham-couples-therapy

Well I'm going to handle this as tactfully as I can and just present the information. 

Farrah Abraham undoubtedly has issues (which she is currently exploring while appearing ALONE on Couples Therapy) and apparently the root of many of these issues stems from a rape trauma and childhood abuse. 

“I was drugged and raped more than once. I allowed the [wrong] type of people into my life,” Farrah claims to In Touch Weekly. The former Teen Mom star also alleges that following the release of her "sex tape" she booked appearances at strip clubs and porn conventions which further put her life in jeopardy.  

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kim-zolciak-kroy-bierman-pregnant

With 4 kids in under 4 years Kim Zolciak promises the twins were her last pregnancy – and to prove it she claims hubby Kroy Biermann is getting a vasectomy! 

“We’ll do something permanent because I’m so fertile!" Kim over-discloses to Life & Style. The permanent meaning the "snip snip" (her words, not mine!). 

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OK! Magazine's pre-Grammy event

Aaaaahhhh Kristen Doute, one-part hoochie mama, one-part crazy, one-part atrociously bad employee, one-part drama queen, and one-part REALLY, REALLY, REALLY bad decision maker! She's one helluva a potent Molotov cocktail! 

After spending an entire season (and I mean entire) of Vanderpump Rules fretting boyfriend Tom "1" Sandoval of cheating with co-worker Ariana Madix, Kristen, the little hypocrite that could, was caught in a cheating scandal of her own – with BFF Stassi Schroeder's ex-boyfriend Jax Taylor.

Of course Kristen denied it. A lot. Even when all evidence pointed to the contrary. But somebody called Sherlock and Law & Order style Kristen got cornered and confessed. Yep, the kitty is out of the bag: Kristen banged Jax – and liked it! 

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teresa-giudice-abc-news

In case you haven't heard Teresa Giudice and Joe Giudice are in big time trouble and face a mounting 41-count federal indictment for several different types of fraud. 

In light of her legal woes, the Real Housewives of New Jersey star, whose troubles will be featured on the upcoming season, insists she's staying strong and trying to make the best of a bad situation for the time being. “I can’t just be upset and crawl up in a ball and just go in a room and —  and lock the door.  I can’t.  I’m a mom.  I have four daughters,” Teresa tells ABC News

Teresa does admit that it's hard to get through the day, however, and in private she is falling apart. "I would be lying to say I didn’t, you know, that’s not happening,” she shares. The hardest part, she says, is "my kids going through this." Should have thought of that BEFORE, you know, lying and defrauding! "I'm a role model for them," Teresa explains. A role model of what NOT to do!  

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shahs-of-sunset-season-two-finale-reza-farahan-adam

Oooh yay! Another Made for TV engagement. This time starring Reza Farahan and boyfriend Adam Neely

Here's to the Shahs of Sunset star nabbing Bravo's first gay wedding spinoff. I so hope Asa is the wedding planner!

So yes, Reza proposed "on my birthday in August," he dishes to Life & Style but the two kept their engagement a secret. Hmmm… wonder why – OH! Because the engagement is going to featured on the season finale Reza reveals. Of course… silly me, I thought engagements were for love, not storylines. 

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