Real Housewives Of Orange County is a world unlike any other. It is a world in which one hires a premiere cake creator to design a cake shaped like a bottle of champagne. Then one reserves a seat on a private jet to fly said cake to the launch of their said champagne. Then, come to find out, the cake is actually fake – as in not really a cake, but a Styrofoam mold that resembles a cake, and the champagne is not really champagne, but a bubbly wine. Why so much precaution over a fake cake? Styrofoam robustly withstands grubby, unskilled hands of kindergarten crafters like Meghan Edmonds, so certainly it doesn’t need a seatbelt on a private jet, or it’s own personal valet. That’s just one of the many things that ponders me from last night’s episode. There are many, many more…
Heather Dubrow is headed to Napa to launch her champagne, which is not actually champagne, because it is not produced in France, therefore it must be called “Methode Champenoise.” Basically it’s bubbly wine. And calling bubbly wine “methode champenoise” is like calling a car port a “porte-cochere.” You can put fondant on a Styrofoam mold, but it’s still Styrofoam mold! Heather – accept it: you made a designer wine cooler!
Tamra and Eddie hit up Mykonos first and then headed over to Santorini. They’ve had (sort bad) sushi, did some shopping and a whole lot of lounging around and relaxing, as well as still getting in their morning workouts. Tamra has been sharing daily pics on Instagram, including some AMAZING photos and videos of the views. And a whole lot of swimsuit pics, naturally. Take a look at their fun vacay below!
The first question out of the gate was a fan wanting to know if the story out there was true claiming that Heather took her eight year old daughter to get her legs waxed. Is it true and isn’t she worried it’s sending a poor message? Heather blasted, “This came out in Star magazine. First of all it came out on Star.com and Terry and I Tweeted about the fact that it was not a true story and no one fact checked, no one called. They took the story but as I was landing in New York last night, I opened Star magazine and there’s an article there. First of all, my daughter is twelve, not eight. Second of all, it is unconscionable and across the line to take kids and put them in these situations. I’m sorry, they have just really, it’s the lowest of the low and I really do expect a retraction and an apology from Star magazine.”
Vicki Gunvalson is standing by her man and slamming naysayers who accuse Brooks Ayers of faking cancer! Brooks may be broker than a joke, but he certainly isn’t depraved enough to fake terminal illness, people! #NoICantBelieveThisIsAStorylineEither
This season Brooks comes under fire from Vicki’s fellow Housewives – specifically newbie Meghan Edmonds – who accuse him of making the whole thing up! Even Vicki’s daughter Briana even begins to question Brooks’ diagnosis and confides in Tamra Barney that she believes he may not really be sick!
Denying rumors that her current story line for this season’s Real Housewives of Orange County, specifically the one about “finding spirituality,” is fake, Tamra Judge is speaking out about the farm fresh realness of her image.
After InTouch recently accused Tamra of creating bogus story lines to keep her persona on the reality show interesting, she laughed it off to RumorFix: “Ha! It’s not my ‘story line,’ I happen to get baptized at the end of the season,” says Tamra, “clearly came from someone that knows nothing about my story line.” (Does the fact that Tamra refers to her actual life as a “story line” not beg the question of its validity in itself!?)
After a fairly short blog last week, the OG of the OC is back with a master’s thesis to give us her take on this week’s episode of the Real Housewives of Orange County, and her rebuttal ofTamra Judge’sblog accusations last week. Vicki Gunvalson begins by addressing Tamra’s claims that Vicki hadn’t reached out to her upon hearing of Brooks Ayers‘ cancer diagnosis. Vicki clarifies, ” I did speak to Tamra after Brooks’ diagnosis. She initially found out from an interview Brooks and I did after he was re-diagnosed with his cancer in October 2014. Tamra and I ended up talking on the phone after that was online, and I told her I was sad and scared and was apprehensive on filming season 10 with Brooks being sick. I told her I ‘didn’t want to be Gretchen’ and was reflecting back when she was filming with her fiancé Jeff who ended up dying while she was on RHOC.”
Vicki also claims, “Tamra was very supportive on the call and said ‘he’ll be fine, you got this and if there was anything we needed to let her know’. So for her to post in her blog that we never spoke is not true.” Also not true is Tamra’s claim that Terry Dubrow never reached out to Brooks. Vicki wonders, “I mean how would Tamra know if Terry and Brooks texted, so I don’t know why she said that.”
Still maintaining that sharing her marital problems with the world is more helpful than hurtful, Shannon claims that the couples therapy filmed for RHOC’s first two episodes “changed both our lives. I never thought our relationship would benefit as much as it did. I wish you could have seen more of the two days that we spent there—so many deep and touching moments.”
In case you were feeling stressed out about the lack of available Real Housewives wines (and other sparkly alcoholic beverages), Heather Dubrow is launching her own champagne, not to be confused with Fabellini. Appropriately this champagne is named after Heather’s 5-year-old daughter Colette, who leads Heather to drink. Heather commissions a giant champagne bottle-shaped cake, that she is flying in its own seat on a private plane to Napa for the launch party of Colette Champagne. All of the ladies are invited. Lifestyles of the rich and guest role on canceled sitcom hopefully famous!
Literally fell asleep – snoooooze, snore, zzzzzzzzzz, yawn at the thought of another Housewives hawking wine storyline.