Well this is totally unprecedented! Seriously, it's like uncharted Bravo territory. I don't even know where to start. Has Andy Cohen signed off on this major occurrence?
We are all far too familiar with the fact that the Housewives franchise is the jumping off point for drama-fueled ladies and their wine/cookbook/work-out ventures, but now a Real Housewives of New York newbie is switching up the entire protocol. She's trying to get her product out there before we've even seen her on the show!
Yolanda Foster is planning a dinner party to honor HER KING. It's David-galore and all about David. I wonder what flowers David likes? Probably the ones that bloom in his presence – he is quite miraculous that way!
On the other side of town in a poor, sad subdivision where normal people who don't have houses built on a foundation of Grammy awards and or a fridge made of diamonds spun from the hair of virgin, albino Persian cats, Brandi is searching for her poor lost dog Chica. Awww… poor Chica. While Brandi annoys the bejesus out of me – and adding to that annoyance is the presence of Kyle in a pirate-themed Kaftan from Kylene By Too Many Kraptans – I totally understand the loss of a pet.
As if the amount of peanut brittle I've eaten today isn't gag-worthy enough, Kris Jenner swoops in to ruin my sugar high with her talk of Kimye's wedding, how in love Yeezus is with daughter Kim Kardashian, and how great things are with Bruce post-separation. It makes me kind of want to poke myself in the eye.
It will come as no surprise that Kim isn't going to tone it down for wedding number three to Kanye West. Shocker! After her million dollar event for a marriage that lasted less than three months, that sounds reasonable enough.
I'm afraid to publicly admit this, but Kenya Moore is growing on me this season. She's not quite as over-the-top this time around, but she's entertaining in a whole new way now (when you overlook that whole Apollo mess).
Kenya shared the bittersweet feelings of visiting such an important piece of history, even if Porsha killed the moment with her ignorance. "Visiting the first African church was bitter sweet. Steeped in culture and history, I was amazed to see it first hand as I have other historical sites around the world. When the guide pointed out the actual markings that the iconic Harriet Tubman and or others used to identify the safe stops for slaves seeking freedom along the Underground Railroad, it was amazing to see."