Reality Tea

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Does Kim Kardashian live in an alternate dimension (we should be so lucky…)? First, she gets excited about this bag and carries it around in public. Then she and tiny rapper fiance Kanye West start planning a honeymoon to outer space (although, if they actually make that happen, I'm happy to donate to the cause!). Next, the pair actually thought they could have their wedding at Versailles…because they are practically royalty, right?

What's next in Kim's land of delusion? How about a size zero wedding dress? Kudos to Kim for losing seventy pounds after the birth of baby North, but girlfriend isn't meant to be a zero. I'm not saying that as a comment to her size, but she'd look silly!  She's supposed to have curves–she paid for them after all, didn't she? Plus, not to get all "soap boxy" but I think women put too much pressure on themselves and other women to maintain a certain standard, and it perpetuates a downward spiral both in fame and in the every day lives of us average Janes. Kim is just adding to it with her recent antics.

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Tori Spelling films at 'Extra'

 

Photos by Paul Hebert/WENN.com

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It's time to see who watched what this week. 

On Sunday, Real Housewives of Atlanta logged 3.695 million viewers. That's down from last week's 4.187 million but enough to make RHOA the top cable telecast (ratings wise) of the night.  Not at the top?  Keeping Up with the Kardashians! Season nine premiered to 2.569 million on Sunday and 2.142 on Monday. Ouch! Sister Wives saw a significant drop (2.0 to 1.44) this week.

Love & Hip Hop won Monday night with 3.447 million fans tuning in, which is a new season high. Holding somewhat steady are Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (1.786) and Vanderpump Rules (1.538).  

On Tuesday, Teen Mom 2 returned for its fifth season, to the dismay of many Reality Tea readers. However the show garnered 2.756 million viewers and was the top cable telecast (ratings wise) of the night.   Also, Dance Moms was watched by 2.010 million, and Shahs of Sunset saw its second lowest number of the season with 1.054 million.

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**EXCLUSIVE** Joanna Krupa wearing an elegant plunging one piece poolside in Miami

Another day, another reality star frolicking in a swimsuit! 

Real Housewives of Miami star Joanna Krupa was snapped poolside with hubby Romain Zago earlier this month.  Joanna was flaunting her almost $300 one piece swimsuit by Skinny Bikini Swimwear. She was snacking on a bag of treats as they relaxed together before Joanna headed back to L.A.  (to have lunch with her fellow reality stars). 

We've seen Joanna in plenty of bikinis and swimsuits over the years, do you think this is one of her best? or worst?

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Evelyn Lozada surprised everyone this year when she disappeared then reappeared six-months pregnant with MLB player Carl Crawford's child. The couple is now engaged

The Basketball Wives star (who reportedly quit the show) is in her last trimester and reveals that she wants to eat sweets nonstop! "I'm not much for eating sugar, but being pregnant has turned me into a sort of junk food addict! For example, I crave Laffy Taffy," Evelyn tells Mamas Latinas. "Seriously, I can't stop eating this stuff!"

Prior to being pregnant Evelyn rarely indulged in junk food. "I'm a pescatarian and a very healthy eater, so this is super weird for me. Recently, I found myself eating Nerds and I haven't had those in years!" 

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David Lynch Foundation Presents:

I hoped to never speak of Princesses: Long Island again – le sigh – but the cast cannot let it go. Believe it or not, they're still holding out hope for a second season,  begging for support on Twitter,  and teasing good stuff to come in interviews. Oy vey. Who else thinks Bravo and Andy Cohen blocked them on Twitter a long time ago?

I can see Chanel Coco Omari sitting in her little girl bedroom. Drawing hearts in her diary. Waiting for Bravo to call her.

About season two, Chanel told Wetpaint, "We aren't sure yet, but hopefully by February or March."  She added that everyone from season one would return. "There are a lot of interesting twists and turns within our group and friendships that would make for an intriguing next season, so hopefully you'll all stay tuned in to see what happens." 

So, if you guys need me, I'll be over here. Staying tuned. Waiting for something intriguing to happen. Until I die of old age.

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Bruce Jenner and Kris Jenner

Dancing With The Stars has become a bit of a Kardashian family tradition! And the latest Kardashian to try and strap on some dancing shoes is patriarch Bruce Jenner!

Now that Kris Jenner is done with their marriage, Bruce is moving on to other things – and that includes branching out on his own! 

"He's dying to do it," a source reveals to Us Weekly. "The show is close to locking him in." Kim Kardashian and Rob Kardashian both appeared on the show, although neither won. Perhaps Bruce can break the family curse?

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Cynthia Bailey and Peter Thomas have been seen having major marital issues on this season of Real Housewives of Atlanta.

Although married only three-years, the couple's sex life is lacking because of Cynthia's stress and health issues so Peter wants to have a secret mancave across town while Cynthia works to pay his bankrupt bills and poor business schemes. Sounds like a marriage worth saving! 

Well things are getting even rockier for the couple! At a Golden Globes party at 1Oak Peter was spotted twerking with a young hottie who certainly wasn't his wife! Or Kenya Moore

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