Reality Tea

dance moms 4

Last night Abby Lee Miller put her threats into action on Dance Moms. Everyone is replaceable, and she set out to prove it with the first of her open auditions. Leslie arrives at the ALDC as if she didn't have a meltdown at the previous competition about disrespect. Abby explains to Leslie that she takes things too personally and her behavior ends up embarrassing everyone. Jill interrupts their pow-wow to butter up Abby with a new pair of earrings. That's a new low! At the pyramid, Abby touts her open auditions in Orlando, and all the girls and moms look like deer in headlights…except for Maddie, of course. Abby invites Maddie and MacKenzie to travel down early to help her with the auditions. Leslie then opens her mouth to inquire as to why they are the ones who Abby chose to assist her. Abby turns to Payton to tell her that her mom often speaks out of turn, and she should be embarrassed by her behavior.

Payton is on the bottom, but she fully expected to be there thanks to her mother. Kendall follows, and Jill is beyond confused. Why did she bother with the earrings? As Kendall is on the verge of tears, Abby reminds her that she needs to cut out the crying. Nia then Paige round out the bottom tier. Kelly is complimented for not causing drama. MacKenzie is in fourth, with Brooke in the third spot. Abby explains to her that she can balance dancing and singing as long as she's performing to the best of her ability. Chloe is in second for following Kendall when she was supposed to dance before her. Once again, Maddie graces the top of the pyramid. Maddie and MacKenzie both get solos, but MacKenzie won't be dancing in the group routine. Brooke will be leading a trio with Paige and Chloe as background dancers. Abby asks the moms to tweet about her open auditions, but Holly refuses to aid in finding a replacement for her daughter. Curses! Abby is foiled again. Not shockingly, Melissa promises to tweet the news.

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us weekly ny

Now that the RHONJ is no longer paying her mortgage, Jacqueline Laurita is selling her home! 

The former Real Housewives of New Jersey star is listing the 5,7000 square-foot Franklin Lakes home for $2.85M. The couple, who almost lost the home to foreclosure last year, paid $1.72 million for the manor-style home in 2001. 

Unfortunately for Jacqueline she is asking far more than the appraised value. The property is assessed for $2.2 M and carries a $34,000 PER YEAR property tax rate.

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The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills - Season 4

Well, Brandi Glanville's "edit" just keeps getting better and better with each week of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' doesn't it? Gracious, girl, do you watch yourself and take any responsibility for your actions? Wait, I already know the answer to that! After watching the confessionals of Brandi and her make-out partner Carlton Gebbia on Monday's episode, Joyce Giraud has a lot to say about the women's tacky behavior (I mean, seriously, getting drunk before Kim Richards' daughter's big night?) from Kimberly's graduation party to lunch and awkwardness at Lisa Vanderpump's abode. 

Taking to her Bravo blog, Jacqueline Joyce begins, "This week's episode was quite interesting for me to watch as I discovered hypocrisy at its maximum exposition. At the beginning of the episode it was interesting to see Carlton and Brandi in their element at the pole dancing. I can understand why they like each other so much," adding, "What I can't understand is how in the world was Carlton so offended that my husband joked about having a naked room when our babies grow up — yet this is pretty much her main storyline? How was she so offended when I spoke about my husband's manhood, yet she does the exact same thing? I wonder if she is getting inspired by the very same things she hates about me and decides to do them? Too much double standard, especially for someone who claims to be so spiritual and to love women." I have often wondered that myself! 

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Kim Parilla RHONJ 1

While I think that all the Real Housewives of New Jersey fancy themselves as actresses (some of that drama has to be fabricated, right?), it seems that one certain relative of a housewife actually has the acting chops to make it in theater. After a successful run off-Broadway in both My Big Gay Italian Wedding and My Big Gay Italian Funeral, Melissa Gorga's (the one who fancies herself a pop star…coincidence?) sister Kim Pirrella is returning to St. Luke's Theatre for a double encore.

According to a press release we received at RT, "My Big Gay Italian Wedding premiered at the Actor's Playhouse in November 2003.  On September 12, 2009, a revised and updated version of the play played a benefit performance at the St. George Theatre in Staten Island; the new production was produced by Dina Manzo of The Real Housewives of New Jersey and was moved to St. Luke's Theatre in Manhattan in May 2010 for a sixteen month run.  During the run, the show hosted some major celebrities including Jersey housewives Caroline Manzo and daughter Lauren, Jacqueline Laurita and daughter Ashley, Teresa Giudice and Dina Manzo.  Tabatha Coffey also proved to be a huge supporter of the show by making multiple appearances and hosting a hairstyling contest back in 2011."

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The third season of Shahs of Sunset has destroyed Reza Farahan and Mike Shouhed's bromance.

Reza took to his Bravo blog to discuss the latest, a drunken (Mike) and childish (Reza) confrontation at Asa Soltan Rahmati's Diamond Water party. The short story is, nothing is Reza's fault, because he is the most loyal, perfect friend to ever roam the Earth.  The long story is, Reza began by dissing the Ballers. "That was a joke," he blogged. "That didn't look like any real estate office I had ever seen.  Where were the files, the papers, or anything else you'd find in a normal office?  Why is Mike looking for a get rich quick scheme?  I'm not an expert, but that type of business doesn't look appealing to a 'real' real estate agent. Did it look like Baller 1 had a lot of mousse in his hair, circa 1990?"

Reza's opinion of that office is spot on – if any business is being done there, I highly doubt it's the legal real estate kind. Did I just agree with Reza? I feel icky and in need of a shower.

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Jeff Lewis and the gang are back. Can you feel my excitement from here?

Flipping Out's seventh season will premiere on Bravo March 5th. This season Jenni Pulos is pregnant with her first child which has Uncle Jeff in a tizzy. 

Crazy Andy is still at Jeff Lewis Deisgn, but with the hiring of a new design assistant Megan, Andy's days are numbered. This season the team will work on designing celebrity homes. On the personal front, Jeff and boyfriend Gage still deal with difficulties in their relationship as Jeff remains anxious about settling down. 

You can check out a preview of the new season below. 

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Snooki and JWoww are both engaged and JWoww has announced her pregnancy.

With both ladies planning weddings during this season of Snooki & JWoww, MTV is putting their engagements to the test during the season finale. 

The Hollywood Reporter reveals that in a 'Newlyweds' style game show special the couples will compete to see which couple knows each other best. 

You can catch a preview below. 

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The Vanderpump Rules crew is still in Cabo celebrating our day of national reckoning; a day where dysfunction is recognized as a peril in great need of attention.

This day is also known as Stassi Schroeder's birthday. While in her mind this day is as important as the day of Jesus' birth, for the rest of humanity it is a day that we remain buried under our covers and asking where it all went so wrong. I blame her mother – it's always the mother's fault, right?!

Anyway things in Cabo are going bad, bad, bad because right in the middle of Stassi's birthday dinner, before anyone remember to order Stassi an appetizer or a drink, Katie Maloney and Tom 2 erupt into an argument about who's more of a moron. Can we call a draw?

Katie flees the table in what can only be described as a pair of pantyhose recycled into a dress. It was a flesh-colored poncho, it was frightful. Maybe it was flesh eating and that explains her sheer stupidity as her brain was a casualty of it's voraciousness. Also it matched her hair. 

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