I know I can be overly snarky, and I realize that sometimes my sarcasm is too much. However, I am being dead serious when I say that someone needs to intervene with poor Leah Shirley. The precious toddler has been the rope that Teen Mom'sAmber Portwood and Gary Shirley use to play their crazy game of tug-of-war, and it's so depressing. I don't doubt they both love their daughter with everything they have, but seriously, this is just too much.
The newest news from this pair stems from a "behind bars" interview that Amber gave to Dr. Drew Pinsky as she serves time for parole violations in an Indiana penitentiary. I mean, is this man even a real doctor? I saw a few episodes of "Loveline" back in the day, but should someone who used to pal around with Adam Corolla really be giving advice to incarcerated teenage mothers? What genius at MTV thought this was a good idea? These sad people aren't characters or cash cows, but yet…Sorry. I will step down from my soapbox now.
Personally, I thought the series finale and Dr. Drew's reunion special (part oneandpart two) were send off enough. However, despite the inevitable spin offs to come, somebody (starts with a 'm' and rhymes with 'teevee') isn't ready to cut the cord.
MTV has announced three new Teen Mom specials. Perhaps the most unexpected one, though, is a half-hour interview with Amber titled Amber Behind Bars: An MTV Special set to air on October 9!
MTV's press release:
In this exclusive half-hour interview, Dr. Drew sits down with Amber Portwood inside the Rockville Correctional Facility for an intimate discussion about what life has been like behind bars, the status of her relationship with her daughter Leah, ex-boyfriend Gary, and her family, and her hopes for the future. As Amber reflects on her situation, she gives viewers an open, honest look inside the intense ups and downs she’s faced during this journey.
Part two brings us the rest of the original cast. Well, almost. Amber Portwood is still at summer camp. <wink, wink>
Maci and Ryan… Sitting in a Tree…
Before Dr. Drew obsesses about Maci Bookout andRyan Edwards living happily ever after, heasks Maci about college. She says, "I'm doing good now. After my first two years, I just realized how fast it was going by. I stopped making excuses. Aside from Bentley, that should be the most important thing." Maci adds she is done wasting her time and money. Also, she travels at least once a week to speak to teens about teen pregnancy.
When Dr. Drew glosses over Amber's absence, I know that this was taped a while back. I mean, "legal and personal issues" and "voluntary five-year prison term" aren't even in the same ballpark. If the "reunion show" isn't going to be taped in real time, I think it's kind of pointless.
Before we get into the meat and potatoes of the reunion, ha, who am I kidding? It's Dr. Drew. Let me start again.
Before we get into the limp lettuce and soggy potatoes of the reunion, Dr. Drew reminds us what happened this season on Teen Mom, as if it isn't already permanently burned into our brains. (I'll show you my scar tissue, if you show me yours.) Alas, the highlights…
Amber and Gary Shirley fight. Amber enters rehab after she threatens suicide. Rehab takes away Amber's fake eyelashes and spray tan but not her drugs. Amber goes home. Amber and Gary fight. Gary gets sole custody of Leah.
Catelynn and Tyler buy pens and notebooks for college. I guess they finally figured out their major crisis.
Catelynn and Tyler visit April and ask her where she stands with Butch. April is torn. She knows she should probably divorce him… but she still loves him. Tyler completely understands. In other news, Catelynn looks beautiful. Her hair and makeup are perfect.
Tyler visits his mom. Kim shares that she is considering counseling. She’s feeling “held back” from seeing Carly. She says, “I knew Carly would go and live and out of state, but I thought they [Brandon and Theresa] would be more open to letting me go see her [Carly].” Kim says she’s running out of patience. I feel for Kim, but she does realize Brandon and Theresa aren’t babysitting Carly, right?
Catelynn and Tyler are supposedly preparing for college. The MTV timeline is confusing. Does the semester start, like, the next day? Hasn’t it been at least a week or two since Tyler pushed Catelynn to enroll because she was running out of time? This will be Catelynn’s first semester and Tyler’s second semester. Catelynn wants to be an adoption counselor and Tyler wants to be a youth counselor. Blah, blah, blah. We’ve heard all of this before.
Like always, Catelynn is thinking too far ahead and not worrying about the right now. Catelynn hopes to someday work with their own adoption counselor Dawn. Catelynn call Dawn to tell her the good news. Dawn thinks it’s a great idea, but kindly reminds Catelynn she needs to start with school.