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The Kardashian sisters attend an in-store appearance at Sears to launch their 'Kardashian Kollection Spring 2013' clothing line

So what's happening on Kardashian island you wonder? Oh you know just more famewhoring, publicity stuntin', and outrageous money grubbing antics. The usz! 

After dealing with her marital implosion on the season finale of Keeping Up With The Kardashians somebody decided to jump ship and make a quick buck! That somebody is Khloe Kardashian, who hiked up her kameltoe jeans, and is trotting out to meet fans in Amsterdam, Dubai, and Australia. How fun. 

Unfortunately for fans the whole meeting their idol thing comes at a price. You don't say?! In order to meet Khloe, fans have to buy items from the abominable hugely successful Kardashian Kollection in order to generate revenue for the klothing line. 

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For goodness sake, Bruce Jenner, cut the cord already! Even though he and Kris Jenner have already confirmed their separation, he continues to allow her to use him to make herself look better in the public's eyes. It isn't going to work, Kris! 

No matter how much she promises the pair will be best friends (while publicly stating her regret at divorcing Robert Kardashian), Kris always has a selfish ulterior motive. I'm still going to think Kris a self-absorbed pimp momager and emasculating wife regardless how many awards she bestows upon Bruce.

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Kim Kardashian celebrates her birthday

Yeezy is innocent, y'all. Well, maybe not innocent technically, but not guilty…at least according to him. Remember when the tiny rapper punched a member of the paparazzi in July while having his picture snapped at LAX? Well, the photographer Daniel Ramos finally had his day in court yesterday. How did that go? Let's just say that Kanye West may have interrupted his Honor to tell him that Judge Mathis is the best damn judge…

Okay, that totally didn't happen, but probably only because Kanye wasn't present in court. But if it did, Kanye would be correct!

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kris-jenner-joan-rivers

Poor Kris Jenner wants everyone to know she's not the evil pimp momager we think she is! 

Speaking to Joan Rivers on In Bed With Joan, Kris admits to being devastated when the news of Kim Kardashian's sex tape with then-boyfriend Ray J leaked.

"I literally fell apart," the Keeping Up With The Kardashians mom admits. “I cried myself to sleep. I don't think anything can prepare you for something like that when it comes to your daughter."

Kris said that she withdrew for a few days before deciding to be strong for Kim and her whole family. And thus the Kardashian kingdom was born. Thank goodness for serendipity I suppose… "I'm somewhat a religious person – and I keep that to myself," Kris says. Lest you forget she owns a church… "So I live a certain way and I feel a certain way and I pray for my kids everyday. I'm so in love with my family life; and that hits me, you know, up the side of the head and I literally fell apart." 

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real-housewives-of-atlanta-kenya-moore

The reality TV viewer numbers for Sunday and Monday are in – and the Real Housewives of Atlanta are back with a bang! The season six premiere pulled in 3.108 million viewers. No doubt RHOA will remain Bravo's number one show.

Also on Sunday, Love & Hip Hop held onto its premiere audience with 2.947 million viewers.  Not so lucky were the Kardashians with only 1.948 million fans tuning in to Keeping Up with the Kardashians this week. So sad.

The Real Housewives of Miami aired both nights this week. Sunday night's show garnered 1.374 million (a season high) viewers. They can thank the ladies of Atlanta for that boost! The season three finale featuring Joanna and Romain's wedding was watched by 957,000 loyal fans.

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Kim Kardashian 33rd Birthday

So this is gonna happen… again.

As if the world hasn't seen enough of Kim Kardashian's naughty bits we're about to get the opportunity to view her better than ever vagina in Playboy. Again. 

The Keeping Up With The Kardashians star is on a quest to prove to the world that her body is just as banging as it was before baby. Starting with a swimsuit selfie, Kim is bringing sexy back! 

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real-housewives-of-miami-season-3-gallery-episode-312-27

It's time to breakdown who's watching what on Sunday and Monday nights.

On Sunday, roughly 2.3 million fans watched the frantic events that led up to North West's early delivery on Keeping Up with the Kardashians. Also, the finale of I Dream of NeNe aired, and the wedding special ended on a strong note with 2.280 million viewers. 

On Monday, season four of Love & Hip Hop premiered to an impressive 2.997 million viewers, which is its fourth highest number ever. Less impressive – and kind of embarrassing – only 764,000 fans witnessed Joanna Krupa's meltdown on Real Housewives of Miami.

Holding steady is Teen Mom 3 with roughly 1.2 million viewers this week. 

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kim-kardashiankanye-engagedment3-

So it seems that Kanye West has found his voice because the man cannot stop talking about getting married to Kim Kardashian. I mean, dude, I'm going to let you finish but I had one of the…nothing.  I've got nothing. I think we are all going to have to let Kanye finish…and that means it could be a long time before he stops doing interviews about his engagement to the reality star. You know what, though? I'm fine with it. He seems to have quieted Kim for the time being, and I have a feeling that Kim is soon going to only know how to smile and nod like Kate Katie Holmes when she was with Tom Cruise.

E! is dishing more on an interview Kanye gave on Monday morning–you know, the one where he discussed finding the perfect ring(s) for the elaborate engagement. He also addressed the dudes who plan on popping the question to their ladies after his Jumbotrontastic love fest, saying, "I gotta apologize to the race of males for turning [it] up so much." He's far too kind. And humble. Surprisingly, the actual ceremony will be relatively low-key, with Kanye only teasing, "Two words: fighter jets."

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