“It’s my party and I can be immature if I want to, bitch if I want to – you would tell lies and ruin people’s lives too if it happened to you!” So that’s the theme song for Vanderpump Rules and singing it in a beautiful, lyrical duet with perfect harmonization are Stassi Schroeder and Kristen Doute.
Lisa Vanderpump is ready for the annual SUR Photoshoot. To celebrate the ten-year anniversary she decides on a 50’s greaser theme, shooting at the old-fashioned Pink Motel complete with a drained cement pool, a pink Cadillac, and a whole lotta Aqua Net on display.
I love the theme, and Lisa wearing a white t-shirt, red lips, and killer 50’s cat-eye shades like the Madame of the Pink Ladies was (aka, Rizzo, after she married a rich mobster and starting running Staten Island) was amazing.
Since Super Stylist Stassi was unavailable to style people she doesn’t like, Lisa had to go ahead and hire a real professional, who can like do her job, put personal differences aside, and recognize the importance of client relations.
Just for the record, Kristen seems wasted in the video – you can see for yourself below – and is slurring her words something awful. And despite the fact that she claims to finally be over Tom, her euphoria when discussing the Miami Girl revelation tells otherwise, as does the flashback footage of her grinning when Jax “finally” spoke the truth. Get your pillows ready to hide your eyes – it’s cringe-inducing.
Scheana Marie had an epiphany of the Kristen Doute persuasion – she finally recognized that sometimes you can’t be friends with everybody, especially when some of those everybodys are crazy! After hearing all the details about Miami Girl, Scheana explains why she doesn’t believe Jax Taylor and why she finally had enough of Kristen’s scheming.
Scheana shares, that after hearing all sides of the story about Tom Sandoval allegedly cheating on Ariana Madix, she “absolutely believes Tom,” but what she – or anyone else, particularly Kristen, thinks – is irrelevant if Tom and Ariana are happy in their relationship. Amen Scheana!
“When the information was originally presented to me, I ABSOLUTELY had doubts, but with further review, I absolutely believe Tom, and at the end of the day, I just want my friends to be happy,” the Vanderpump Rules star explains.
Last night on Vanderpump Rules lies flowed as precipitously as questions of truth and all converged together at the mouth of a river named Jax Taylor. Or something like that…
While Scheana Marie is on a blissful honeymoon in Hawaii, back home at SUR (SUR is a city now) things are erupting into a civil war – a civil war that is the opposite of civil, of course.
Kristen Doute has been “blowing up” Jax’s phone with texts and phone calls insisting he tell “the truth” about Tom Sandoval and “Miami Girl.” Once, a very long time ago, when Jax was trying to look like boyfriend of the year to future pizza parlor dumpee Carmen Dickman, he disclosed to Kristen and Carmen that the tabloid stories were true: Tom 1 did play three minutes in heaven? hell? with Miami Girl. Jax has been trying to retract it ever since; putting Kristen off, telling her to leave him out of it and deal with it on her own.
But Kristen has been using this statement to zealously fuel her fervor. It has stoked her loins with future retribution, the little talisman she has carried deep in her heart, that there is a way to weasel in between the home wrecking hussy Ariana Madix and Tom’s future and re-seize him for her demented little self. You think I am exaggerating, but Kristen is like Golum with the ring in Lord Of The Rings.
Kristen teams up with Stassi Schroeder and resorts to using Jax Taylor as a source of the “truth” regarding what happened in Miami – Jax has changed his story several times. As a result Kristen ends up on the outs with all of her friends from SUR!
In anticipation for the onslaught of negativity she is surely to receive, Kristen announced she’s taking a wee break from twitter to focus on her healthy relationship with James Kennedy, her friends, and bowling. She also celebrated her birthday!
It’s Oscar mania everywhere as we lead up to Sunday night’s awards ceremony. And while our favorite reality stars will most likely NEVER attend the Oscars, much less WIN one, they still love to party and celebrate anyway!
Last night was part 2 of Scheana Marie‘s wedding on Vanderpump Rules. And outside of Bridezilla meltdowns and parking lot brawls it was a beautiful event. It appears that it’s not a Scheana Marie party without somebody gettin’ punched…
Kristen Doute wipes away tears as she congratulates Scheana. The faraway look in her eye is focused on Tom Sandoval, nuzzling Ariana Madix‘s neck as they giggle at an inside joke. Kristen remembers those days, etched deeply into her fabricated memories. Kristen so wanted to rip Scheana’s wedding gown off of her, tackle Tom 1 with it – muzzling him with the 15 pound pearl-beaded crop-top, wrap him up in the table cloth skirt, and drag him to the altar!
Jax Taylor is not a fan of Kristen Doute, even though he was willing to sleep with her. Twice. But c’mon, people make mistakes, right?! Jax shares that not only is Kristen a manipulative nightmare, who is using James Kennedy, but that she ruined Scheana Marie‘s wedding!
Jax says the scene where Tom Sandoval confronts James about Kristen’s sneaky behavior made him “really feel bad for the guy” because he is so clearly being used by Kristen. “He’s a young kid who likes this girl and trying everything in his power to have a relationship with her, when she’s still pining over Tom,” the VanderpumpRules star says.