Real Housewives Of Atlanta Recap: Twelve Days Of Cake

On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta, NeNe couldn’t go through with finalizing her divorce and Cynthia divorced her sister by asking her to stay out of her marriage. Kim and Kandi made amends and Kandi successfully wrote a country song with artist Jo Dee Messina. Sheree learned that Tierra‘s boyfriend is planning to propose – and has already asked Bob for his consent!

Things start out at Cynthia‘s house. Peter and Cynthia are both upset about Mal‘s behavior at their anniversary party. Cynthia decides she is done with their fighting, to which Peter claims, he has no issues with Mal he just doesn’t want to deal with her.

Moving on, Kim and Kandi get together for a heart to heart at her new rent-a-mcmansion. Kim acts as if she is lady of the manor, but she’s really hoochie on the hill. I did like her red striped sofa. Kandi and Kim discuss how their friendship got so off track, and it basically is because of a little track known as, Tardy For The Party. They agree business and friendship don’t mix and I notice Kim never apologized for stealing Kandi’s money!


Kim and Kandi had a real friendship prior to the song, but Kim took advantage of Kandi and I’m not sure why Kandi wants to continue a friendship with her. While Kandi is more than willing to let tens of thousands of dollars slide, Kim can’t let go of the “black baby” comment and, again, asks Kandi about it. Kandi, again, explains she never said that and throws Cynthia under the bus to exonerate herself from blame. Interesting, that without She-desperatelyneedsapaycheck-Ree they were able to talk as adults!

NeNe is meeting with her attorney to sign her divorce papers. Except, she can’t go through with it! At the last-minute she panics and realizes she needs Gregg as a safety net. Or the divorce storyline was fabricated by Bravo, as rumors have suggested in the past.

She admits she is the breadwinner now and that is where problems began! NeNe hems and haws and tries to flirt with her divorce attorneys, who just want their check pulled out of that rent-a-Birkin she won’t set on the floor for old timey superstitions sake. NeNe ultimately decides she can’t cast Gregg aside.

Apollo is making a speech about overcoming obstacles related to his time in prison for a white-collar crime. He’s speaking at a breakfast for community leaders who want to empower young men from making the wrong choices. Apollo is really nervous and wants his wife there for support, but Phaedra is too busy accessorizing Ayden to make it into the facility on time. Was it me, or did she leave that child in the car with the windows up for a long time while she fussed with the stroller?

After putting his baby sunglasses on, she shows up as Apollo is getting his stride and speaking more confidently. I think he was reassured to see her there. It was sweet. Phaedra is, of course, supportive and believes this will be excellent preparation for when Apollo assumes his new role as phuneral director.

Sheree pays a visit to her former assistant and daughter, Tierra. Tierra is excited that she has a new job and is loving it. She is also excited that Damon is planning to propose! As Tierra fills her mother in on the happy news, Sheree is nothing but negative, warning Tierra to prepare for divorce because men change after putting on that ring and everything you expected won’t work out. Well, She by Shegold-digger, when you marry for money you earn every cent! I was really unimpressed by her nay-saying AND by turning around her daughter’s happy announcement into being all about Sheree! Bitterness is not attractive!

A few things about Tierra: 1) what happened to all that furniture Sheree bought her last season? I didn’t see any of it in her apartment! 2) What is wrong with Damon‘s teeth? He is a handsome man, but he has one brown front tooth! Really – why?

Meanwhile, Malorie decides to apologize to Cynthia for misbehaving at the one-year anniversary ‘surprise we survived’ party! Cynthia and Mal almost immediately get into it about how much Peter sucks. Cynthia threatens to point out that Mal has issues in her own marriage, but Mal keeps trying to change the subject insisting that’s not the point. It’s interesting that Cynthia has absolutely no problem being direct and out-spoken with her sister, as she explains, Mal is not a marriage counselor and has no business offering unsolicited advice or trying to meddle in Cynthia’s life.

Mal awkwardly apologizes without really meaning it, they hug and accept that right now their relationship is in a bad place. Mal is going to Paris to focus on her own rocky marriage and Cynthia gets to stay stranded in Hotlanta with Peter to pretend everything is fine with her wreck of a marriage. Cynthia really does love denial, doesn’t she?

Kandi is preparing to go to Nashville to pitch her song to Jo Dee Messina. Kandi is nervous since Nashville and country music are totally different from the hip hop world. According to her, while country is about living on a prayer and worrying about paying bills, hip hop is about blowing your money on a Bentley. Kandi is hopeful Jo Dee will like the song and the country music scene will embrace her. I thought the song sounded good! I am excited to hear their collaboration together.

Our only glimpse of Moneybags Mugshot Marlo comes, when she admits to Lawrence that she did use the infamous F word in South Africa, but graciously did not want to get into a fight at Cynthia‘s party so she pretended not to know what She by Sheinstigates was talking about. Fascinating… and shockingly classy, dare I say! Lawrence accepts her apology, but Marlo fails to see how it’s so wrong to use the word since she doesn’t see it as an insult. Lawrence compares it to calling a woman a bitch and Marlo is still drawing a blank. Marlo has to dash off because Neiman’s is keeping the store open for her Big Poppa’s credit card and girl has money to blow!

Ayden‘s first birthday party is happening. With 12 cakes. Four party planners. And Dwight. I thought he swore he would not appear on film this season. The birthday is at a water park which is apparently 2 hours away from Atlanta. Phaedra has chartered a bus to transport everyone.

Dwight practically molests Phaedra upon her arrival; fawning all over her swimsuit and her body. It was creeptastic. At least Phaedra wasn’t wearing a crown of roses – just a very ugly bathing suit. Because Ayden is a prince, who wears a crown of Burberry, money is no object and this is the first birthday party to end all birthday parties.

Sheree, desperate for film time, claims she is the only Housewife to attend and she spends the entire party complaining. Kandi, Marlo, and Cynthia were also there but for some odd reason not shown on film. #Shereeneedsastoryline. Despite the heat and the facilities, Dwight is wearing a 3-piece suit, his face looks made of wax from all the heavy foundation, like a living Madame Tussaud’s creation. He whisks around the pool introducing the Birthday Prince and the twelve cakes–one for each month Ayden was alive–Phaedra commissioned and I was worried his face would be melting into the icing.

Sheree is having lunch with Damon to quiz him on the proposal because he needs to ask her permission before popping the question. Damon tells Sheree he has actually already asked Bob, since he is Tierra’s father and will be paying for the wedding! BWAHAHAHA! Sheree is shocked and appalled – even though Tierra considers Bob her father and he raised her. I think it was nice of Damon to uphold tradition.

Sheree doesn’t believe Bob will be paying for this wedding, since he owes all that child support and all. You know, once Sheree found out Bob was footing the bill, suddenly she started envisioning a huge, lavish, and extravagant wedding on his dime.

Sheree decides to help Damon pick out the ring because he doesn’t really know what he’s looking for. Damon reminds Sheree that he is on a budget and Sheree remembers why she doesn’t think he’s a good match for Tierra–he’s not loaded–as she starts talking 3 carats and perfect clarity. I’m frankly very surprised that down to earth and hard-working Tierra is a product of Sheree.

Kandi and Ronnie make it Nashville to record a track with Jo Dee. Jo Dee’s entourage consists of a nine-piece live band and they play the song all the way through, right then and there. Kandi is so nervous and it’s a little silly and unprofessional. I understand country is very different from hip hop, but still she’s won Grammy awards for Pete’s sake!

Jo Dee announces she wants to perform the new track live that evening to a small group of people to test it out. Kandi is freaked out and very nervous about it being released in its infancy, but Jo Dee and Lil Ronnie are confident.

NeNe is meeting with a therapist – FIN-A-LEE. She desperately needs help! Although, I really cannot stand these stupid televised fauxtherapy sessions. Can we please get a new plot here, Bravo? NeNe is seeking help, not because she attacks people on a regular basis; not because she is consumed with rage and out of control behaviors; but because she can’t decide whether or not to get divorced.

NeNe feels she has grown and changed but Gregg hasn’t. Oh, she’s changed – her head and her ego have really expanded! She admits she isn’t sure if she is happy or not and what she expects from her marriage anymore, although she does still love Gregg. This “therapist” is a really good at telling NeNe what she wants to hear, but does caution her that she can’t have her cake and eat it too. She explains that Gregg also has a voice in the situation. NeNe is still pondering staying together with Gregg, but recognizes they have a lot of work to do and a lot of forgiving and forgetting.

Jo Dee and the crew head to Nashville’s legendary Bluebird Cafe, which really is amazing. I’ve been there. Jo Dee is refreshingly down to earth and is totally wearing normal clothes. Kandi will also be taking the stage beside Jo Dee. Kandi is really proud of herself for branching out and trying something new in her career. Moving into country music is a lot better than sex toys. She should abandon that whole endeavor and call Faith Hill instead.

I also really hope Kandi leaves this show and pursues The Kandi Factory instead. I like her and I think she is better than the nonsense she participates in on RHOA.

Next Week: Ayden gets baptised. Kroy returns. Sheree tries to force Damon into bankruptcy over an engagement ring and Kim confronts Cynthia!