Big Rich Atlanta Recap: Another Day, Another Assault


I have such a love/hate relationship with Big Rich Atlanta. I love it one week. Hate it the next week. Rinse and repeat. Sadly, the return of Katie Davidson's deplorable designer, Drunk Donald, ruins this week's show for me. Katie and her little pissant need to go away (and take she who shall not be mentioned) so I can enjoy the crazy antics, business dealings, and mother/daughter relationships of the rest of the cast. 
Prime example of the antics and relations that I want more of:
Thanks to the tanning, clothing and hair "emergencies" suffered by her two adult daughters, Harvin and Meyer Eadon, every month, Virginia Kolb is feeling more Big Broke Atlanta than Big Rich Atlanta. The woman looks like she needs a grey goose martini (straight up with a lemon twist) while paying bills and reviewing Harvin and Meyer's spending habits. 
Apparently, Harvin and Meyer each receive a weekly allowance of $1,000 from Virginia. Must be nice, right? Then, there's a separate fund for Harvin and Meyer to pull from if a killer sale happens an emergency strikes, haha. When Virginia calls attention to the fact that the sisters spent over $7,000 on "emergencies" the month prior, Meyer cries, "It's a full-time job trying to look good!" And here I thought the only hair emergencies in Atlanta involved a dustpan and broom. 


Virginia demands that Harvin and Meyer get their superfluous spending under control, adding, "If you can't budget your own life, how are you going to budget She Blames Me and be responsible for the spending there." Harvin and Meyer, who are completely silent and barely moving, appear to be in shock.

Meanwhile, Marcia Marchman and Meagan McBrayer discuss a Designers Showcase that Marcia is participating in, and they can't help but to wonder if Drunk Donald will be there. Recalling the Harvest Party, Marcia admits that she never thought she'd be the kind to throw a drink on someone, but then Donald happened. If you ask me, Marcia gets a free pass on this one because Donald's undeniable charm assholery obviously brings out the best worst in people. 
Later, over lunch, Marcia tells Sabrina McKenzie and Cori Davenport about the upcoming charity event. Once again, Donald's name comes up, which leads to both Sabrina and Cori learning about the Harvest Party that they apparently weren't invited to. Not that they care a whole lot – I mean, it's Katie. Marcia gives Sabrina and Cori the Cliff Note version of Donald's drunken display and comes to realize that she wants Katie to apologize for not sticking up for her. 
Back to the Eadons, Virginia invites Mike to the house, which makes Harvin and Meyer super uncomfortable. Things go from awkward to wretched once Mike learns how irresponsible Harvin and Meyer are with Virginia's money. "I'm an arts kind of girl," Harvin weakly explains, to which Mike replies, "That's fine, but you still have to have an understanding of prices." Needless to say, Harvin and Meyer do not appreciate Mike's input and request that he be gone.
Harvin wants to know what the guy who met her mama at a cougar bar knows about their allowance, and Virginia replies, "He knows that he's your age and doesn't have one. He makes his own money." Still, the sisters are not impressed by their mama's boy toy, to say the least, and do not appreciate his condescending attitude. Harvin and Meyer bail on Virginia's dinner party in favor of a Friday night out, saying, "We're going to go chill with people our age, to have fun." To Virginia, Harvin adds, "with your credit card" and "catch me if you can, Goose." 
Later, at a local club, Harvin and Meyer are mortified to learn that Goose did indeed catch them, by blocking their access to the "emergency drinks" fund. When they envision themselves having to, like, wash dishes or something, Meyer pouts, "We don't deserve that." Thankfully, a friend picks up Harvin and Meyer's tab, saving them from dishpan hands. #wholebodyshudder
Marcia invites Katie out to lunch and wastes no time asking her why she has yet to reach out and apologize. Katie responds with her standard (meaningless) "I'm sorry" and (dead eyes) creepy smile. Marcia tells Katie that she doesn't want to be around Donald if he insists on belittling her. Katie continues to make excuses for Donald's disgusting behavior. Marcia asks Katie why she didn't stand up to Donald. Katie blames a glass of wine and tells Marcia that she needs to get thicker skin, adding, "He gets crazy when he's been drinking. You just have to be strong with him." Marcia cannot believe the nonsense that is coming out of Katie's mouth.
Marcia tells Katie, the bottom line is, Donald acts out because he's jealous of your friendships. Katie says maybe so, adding, "But I like him because he is so out there and crazy and he says things that make me laugh." Marcia points out that he's hurting people, which is not okay, and Marcia fake apologizes. Again. On her couch, Katie reminds us that she's a proper Southern lady, saying, "I'm not sure what I did wrong, but I'm just going to bite my tongue and move on." Note to Katie: If you have to constantly remind us (and your friends) of your proper Southern lady status, you're missing a piece of the puzzle.
Moving on, Meyer calls an emergency family meeting following the credit card mishap. She's like, our card denied us drinks, and Virginia is like, you have an allowance and need to budget for those drinks. Virginia puts her foot down, saying, "There is no more emergency fund. The bank of mom is closed." Meyer tells Virginia that she'll feel awful and regret her decision if her daughters find themselves in a real emergency and get stolen because they have no way to get home. An unfazed Virginia assures Meyer that the bad guys would bring her and Harvin back home. 
Virginia tells Harvin and Meyer, if y'all want more money, y'all have to earn it. Meyer cries, "Why are you being so mean?!?" When Virginia leaves the room, Harvin yells, "Meeting not adjounred!" Still, Virginia stays away, and Harvin and Meyer are forced to face their new $1000 a week reality.
The Designers Showcase is underway. Marcia shows off the living room that she designed like a true professional. Donald, on the other hand, bitches about how evil women brought drama into the world. And, of course, Katie stands by his side, smiling and giggling. On her couch, Maria laments, "Katie prides herself on being the perfect Southern lady, but when Donald comes around, it's like he gives her a hall pass for bad behavior." Donald pokes fun at Marcia every chance he gets and then cries about how mean she has been to him when the event organizer asks him to tone down the hate.
Katie finds her way to Marcia's room, then, to brag about Donald's sophisticated design. While Marcia thinks it actually looks cheap, she tells Katie that she's too much of a professional to drag Donald (or his design) through the mud in front of an audience. This prompts Katie to use the stick up her ass to catapult herself onto her high horse. Now that shes more comfortable, Katie reminds Marcia that she threw a drink in Donald's face, an act that she has yet to aplogize for, and implies that any wrong doing on Donald's part is a figment of Marcia's imagination. "We all know you need a little counseling," Katie singsongs. "You're a little sensitive."
Marcia comes to realize that Katie is not a real friend, admitting, "Today was a real eye-opener. Katie really hurt me with the things she said." Katie scurries back to the mean girls lair where Donald is still bashing Marcia to anyone who will listen. Donald takes his show across to hall when that gets boring so he can insult Marcia to her face. Sabrina, who hasn't ever experienced Drunk Donald before, cannot believe what she's hearing. Katie waves her finger in Sabrina's face and tells "girl" that she's "had it with her" when Sabrina attempts to talk to her about her behavior. Undeterred, Sabrina repeatedly tells Katie that she's being rude and disrespectful.


Katie keeps on, Sabrina keeps on. They go back and forth until Katie tells Sabrina to "get her fat ass away" and calls her a bitch, which prompts Sabrina to slap Katie across the face. HARD. Sabrina rips off her jacket, saying, "Lord. God. Jesus. This is why I don't do this. Enough, Katie. Enough." Katie leaves the room and claims her jaw is out of alignment. She also says that she cannot close her teeth together despite the fact that she's talking (naturally opening and closing her jaw) with ease. Donald reports back to the crowd: Katie is considering calling a lawyer and maybe even "the medical" because her jaw is in such bad shape. Um. Way to prioritize those phone calls. 

On the couch, Meyer says, "I'm sorry, but Katie asked for every single bit of that slap." Harvin agrees, adding, "Sabrina felt backed into a corner and reacted the way she reacted."  

Gee. Where have we seen and heard all of this before? #rollingmyeyes Seriously, Style Network, y'all better write a new story for season two of Big Rich Atlanta, if there is one. 



Photo credit: Style Network