Yolanda Foster and her endless “journey” are infesting this season’s Real Housewives of Beverly Hills like lice in a kindergarten class. Everyone’s itchy. But Patient Zero is not happy (or rather claims she’s not happy) about her children getting involved in her StoryLyme. Because she’s only interested in exploiting them through sick-kid selfies, photoshopped by Yo herself!  Yolanda took her her blog this week to go on…and on…and on about the many splendored feelings she has about her health, her children’s health, her castmate’s opinions about her and her children’s health. You know, the usual! 

Here are the highlights: 1) Yolanda bizarrely blames Lisa Vanderpump for exploiting Bella and Anwar Hadid’s Totally Legitimate Illnesses! 2) Erika Girardi is a good friend because she lies. Confused? Well, read on!

After thanking Bravo viewers – AGAIN – for partaking in this “journey” with her <gag>, Yolanda writes, “I am happy to share that it’s been a pretty good week…What is a good week? For me, it’s about more bright moments of ‘I’ve got this, I CAN DO THIS!’ than usual. Treatments, pain and severe fatigue still keep me in bed 18 out of my 24 hours each day, but I am grateful for the luxury of reading and writing again. Healing the brain is a slow process and on its own clock, but I am for sure making steady progress–one day at a time.”


Having made her bedroom her office, Yolanda can apparently work in that #WhiteRobe of hers all day long now! She praises herself for her new-found productivity: “It’s common for the chronically ill to feel inadequate about not participating in life, but we often forget that fighting long-term disease is a full-time job on its own. It’s not for pussies, that’s for sure!” 

In case we’re not convinced that Yolanda is indeed afflicted with a CHRONIC ILLNESS, she explains the following ten-thousandth wacko treatment plan. “I’m am excited to start another healthy week of nourishing my body with anti-inflammatory, antioxidant, energizing and immune-building foods. During this week I will be consuming over 35 different types of vegetables and 14 different types of beans, nuts and seeds. You really are what you eat, especially for those of us who battle chronic disease. Keeping the inflammation down to a minimum is key and relieves a lot of symptoms.”

Praising Erika for her show and calling her an “inspiration,” Yolanda moves on to discuss the fallout of Erika’s loose lips: Kyle Richards and Lisa V ending up on Yo’s sh*t list. Yolanda defends, “I feel I should clarify the subject at hand…Discussing my children’s and my health issues with the intent to provoke doubt or gossip is not OK. I shared my concerns about my children’s health with Kyle on two separate occasions with plenty of opportunity for her to ask questions. She chose to bring it up once again at her barbecue just to stir the pot without any consciousness or consideration about the fact that it was my children she was talking about. Obviously she had discussed this matter with LVP in detail before.” 

Still obviously smarting from LVP’s refusal to look at her kids’ medical records (who DOES that!?), Yolanda blogs, “I went to ‘great lengths’ to show Lisa and Kyle my kids’ medical records just to finally shut down the conversation. Our journey is backed up with black and white proof, so if you have time to gossip about such a sensitive subject, why can’t you make time to review the facts of it?”

“I am an adult and have learned to accept people’s ignorance on the matter of Lyme and invisible chronic disease in general. Both my children deserve a sincere apology from those adults who cast doubt on their journey and put this bad seed out in the universe. It is simply unconscionable that my ‘friends’ would doubt and discredit my word relating to such a delicate and sensitive matter.”

Yolanda argues that Erika was indeed the only “good friend” to her throughout this entire debacle. “Erika did what a good friend does: She brought me truthful information which was accurate. There is a difference between talk that is factual and trash talk.”

“We have all seen this story unfold in front of our eyes, step by step and it’s simple: Untruths were brought to the table for consideration, provoking doubt and discomfort amongst my friends and in our community. The problem starts there–the wind that starts the fire. I won’t burn in this flame, though…I have let this go. I will continue to defend my children, but I will not engage in this gossip!”


As for Lisa Rinna’s involvement in the “chatter” – or lack thereof – Yolanda keeps it short…and vague: “I told Lisa R about the conversation that had come up at the BBQ regarding my children and she confirmed it…my emotional response is what you saw.” She confirmed it…how? And how, exactly, is confirmation of a conversation suddenly spun into Deep Throat Informant Level 10 Instigator!?!? 

Perhaps it’s just Yolanda’s high expectations of “real” friends that come back to bite her, she argues. “Maybe my expectations are high when it comes to loyalty, but if everyone just chose to stand up for what is right, we wouldn’t still be talking about this subject, right?” Riiiiiiiiiiight. 


Photo Credit: Instagram 

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