RHOBH’s Teddi Arroyave Praises Dorit Kemsley’s Party; Knows A Wine Glass From A Flute…But Just Doesn’t Care!

Everyone and everything on this season’s Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is getting on my last nerve except for Kyle Richards…which has me wondering if I’m suffering from some horrible disorder. When ol’ Splits McGee is the lady I’m vying to befriend, you know it’s bad! I’m enjoying Erika Girardi and am glad to see she’s burying the hatchet with Dorit Kemsley. However, Dorit (and her accent) is condescending and painful, so there’s that. The verdict is still out as to my opinion on Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave, but Dorit’s treatment of this woman at every turn has me at least sympathetic. Also, am I the only one who loves Vanderpump Rules Lisa but is indifferent towards RHOBH Lisa V? What is my problem this season? Do I need Bravo to bring back Taylor Armstrong?

Maybe it’s simply the lack of genuine drama that is disappointing. Are we still talking about late-gate and shaming bartenders over wine glasses champagne flutes? If your biggest worry is whether your driver will be able to navigate rush hour traffic to make it to the helipad so you can surprise your husband with a chopper ride and floating casino for his fiftieth birthday, there likely isn’t much to scream about. At least Teddi seems to have the ability to take the pettiness with a grain of salt…at the moment.

In her Bravo blog, Teddi recaps Tuesday’s show. She begins, “It’s been a few episodes since you’ve seen any horses—I’m glad we’re back in the saddle. Lisa Vanderpump inviting me to come riding with her was awesome. Even more lovely was Ken delivering us tea! I can’t even get Edwin to bring me a roll of toilet paper, so it’s a real shock to the system. During our conversation, I open up a bit about my reservations hosting things for these women, and while I would love to have them at my beach house, I just don’t want to feel uncomfortable in my own home because I don’t care about proper glass etiquette. When Lisa presses for me to spill more tea, I’d prefer to just drink mine.”

Proving that late-gate isn’t going anywhere any time soon, Teddi jokes about her double date with Kyle and Mauricio. She recalls, “I love that Kyle and Mauricio joke about being late, and as the dinner progresses I see that Kyle and I really share similar humor as well as a love for when our husbands speak Spanish! Oh, here’s the oh-so-glamorous tale of how Edwin met my father: Yes, my dad pulled up in a black SUV, and yes he had a bodyguard who jokingly manhandled Edwin, but all of this was while the smell of grease wafted through the air of the parking lot at the McDonald’s by the Indianapolis airport. And after my dad advised Edwin not to mess with his daughter, they shared a McFlurry and have been as tight as one overprotective father and his son-in-law can be. The end.”

Teddi also acknowledges the funniest snippets from the episode–Lisa Rinna reciting Teddi’s excruciating text invitation for an OC overnight and the ladies trying not to topple over on the ramp leading down to the yacht for PK’s birthday party. She writes, “Lisa Rinna’s dramatic reading of my novel/text was everything! Potluck and twin beds—these ladies are not ready!” Adding, “Also everything: the montage of us all trying to hobble down the not-even-that-steep-walkway to the boat on our various stilts. Hilarious!”

Speaking of the party, Teddi remains upbeat and self-deprecating, taking nary a poke at the hostess’ bad behavior. She asserts, “Dorit’s party for PK was amazing; I was impressed by her efforts and the love they have for each other was on full display. And major props to Dorit for singing ‘Fever!’ I would have knocked the veneers right out of my mouth. When Dorit pulled me aside, I can tell I had one too many proseccos and not enough caviar by the slight slur in my voice (so that’s three languages I mangled in one episode), and we were going to talk in circles again; that’s not the boat making you seasick, people! Thankfully, I had my trusty mouthpiece to help express what I was trying to say. I know the difference in glasses—I just don’t care.”

She concludes, “I guess I need to figure out a better way to communicate other than my RBF and elaborate eye rolls before I’m Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave Bates starring in Psychos: Housewives in Glass Houses.”

You know what, I think Teddi is definitely growing on me!


[Photo Credit: Bravo]