Real Housewives Whose Glam Needs Work

(Photo by Gary Gershoff/Getty Images)

A glam squad has become synonymous with almost any Real Housewives star. Sometimes, the crew hits the jackpot with a look, but other times, the avant-garde looks are lost on viewers who feel that some of the women get carried away with their fashion statements. Some women insist on dragging their squads all over the country and even on the cast trips. 

While we mere mortals can’t fathom what is like to dress in luxury brands, since I am personally sitting here in yoga pants wiping away a wine stain, I can see that some of the Real Housewives fashion houses need a reshuffle. Here is who I think should give the pink slip to their own squads. 

Shannon Beador

Shannon Beador/Instagram

Glam isn’t always about the clothes that the star is wearing. Case and point- Shannon Beador. The mother of three has had average garment choices, but her makeup has been atrocious. Thanks to overdone filler and cakey makeup, Shannon often looks overdone and older than she is. More often than not, Shannon is given a dark smokey eye, which has been outdated since the mid-2000s. For once, I would like to see Shannon in a toned-down look that highlights her natural beauty. Her style just reminds me of Chico’s circa 2005. 

Mary Cosby

Mary Cosby/Instagram

Mary Cosby may be committed to looking fabulous at all times, including making her debut in Season 1 by being late to the ski slopes in honor of Chanel, but her style is anything but timeless. Perhaps the worst part about Mary is she does own some lovely designer pieces, but when she puts them all together, it looks like a Sesame Street character vomited all over her. It isn’t clear if Mary has a glam squad or not, but whoever is dressing her doesn’t have an eye for style. There is just too much going on, but in the famous words of Mary, “I like to wear the brands that don’t give you wedgies, and Chanel is one of them, and I’m willing to wait for it.” 

Meredith Marks

Meredith Marks/Instagram

This Salt Lake City housewife has tried everything, including looking like Cookie Monster and channeling her inner Britney Spears for an all-denim look that even Justin Timberlake would be envious of. Now, I am not sure who is dressing Meredith Marks, but we do know that sometimes her son, Brooks Marks, stakes a stab at her closet. Meredith often looks uncomfortable in her clothing and wears too deep of V when it comes to her neckline. Sometimes, I just want to see Meredith give a big stretch and break free from all the fabric. 

Jennifer Aydin

Jennifer Aydin/Instagram

The frizzy hair, mismatched outfits, and cheap fabrics all could be considered an eye sore and need to be stopped at once. Jennifer Aydin once shared that she very much was in control of her makeup, but in recent months, are look has been elevated but not to a heavenly level. Her new look gives an Ariana Grande vibe but over 40. Jen has the money, so why not spend it on a top-of-the-line glam squad? Personally, my least favorite look is the Sandy from Grease outfit: black Spanx and black Bordeaux top. Yuck! 

Dorit Kemsley

Dorit Kemsley/Instagram

The 90210 housewife once told ET that she doesn’t spend as much on glam as Erika Jayne, who admitted she spent “$40,000 a month.” But I’m not buying that. There is no arguing that Dorit Kemsley spends a copious amount of time on her looks and probably has mood boards with her styling team. But I feel that she wears way too much of one designer at one time. Head to toe Louis Vuitton, Dior, Chanel? It’s all too much. 

I may go as far as saying it is gross. In the wise words of the countess, “Even Louis Vuitton makes mistakes.” It doesn’t take a genius to drape themselves in one entire designer. I also really hate those CHA NEL earrings. 

Erika Jayne

Erika Jayne/Instagram

Of all the housewives, Erika is by far the most dependent on her glam squad. She spends, as we know, $40K a month on her styling team, and for what? Her looks are either nuevo rich, dominatrix, or homeless criminal. But Erika has made it clear that she will never give up her hair, makeup, and styling team.