Why Ariana and Schwartz Will Never Be Friends Again

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The backlash to Ariana Madix is in full swing. Now, Vanderpump Rules viewers are angry at her for not being friendly to Tom Schwartz. You know, the best friend of her cheating ex, Tom Sandoval, who knew about the affair the whole time.

Despite eleven seasons full of evidence that he is actually the worst, Schwartz’s baby voice and puppy dog eyes still work to make him seem like a “nice guy.” Suddenly, Ariana is the villain for not wanting to say hi to one of the men who tried to destroy her reputation. Isn’t this akin to yelling at women that they should “smile more”?

Even on a show known for unlikely friendships, we don’t see these two making up. Too many things have changed since Ariana was one of Schwartz’s groomsmen. Because of Schwartz’s actions, there’s no way he and Ariana could ever have a genuine friendship again. Let’s break down the many reasons why.

Schwartz Actively Participated In Scandoval (And Lied About It)

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It’s not just that Schwartz kept a secret for his struggling friend. He actively helped cover up Sandoval’s months-long deception. Schwartz’s apartment was a safe haven for Sandoval and Rachel Leviss to carry out their affair. And Schwartz spent time with the lovers, going on double dates with them and his friend/roommate/situationship Jo Wenberg. Schwartz even admitted that Jo snuck Rachel in like “contraband” on the Toms’ ski trip. He’s constantly lied about how long he knew. How could Ariana be friends with someone who did all of that behind her back?

And right in front of Ariana’s face, Schwartz joked that Rachel’s type was “men that are taken” and “warned” that Sandoval should watch out. Schwartz also participated in a fake showmance storyline with Rachel to distract from the actual affair.

While Scandoval is the most egregious example, Schwartz has a long history of lying to protect his buds. Let’s not forget that, in Season 6, Schwartz outright admitted he’d cover for Jax Taylor no matter what. Aside from Sandoval and Jax, who could possibly trust this man?

Schwartz Is Still Bad Mouthing Ariana

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In Season 10, Schwartz participated in Sandoval’s attempt to make Ariana the villain in their relationship. This was obviously intended to justify the affair.

This season, while acting like he just wants to be her friend, Schwartz is STILL insulting Ariana. In confessionals, he’s called her “the patron saint of scorned women” and an “ice queen.” He also snapped that she’s not the “queen of the group.”

When he’s not calling Ariana names, Schwartz stands by as Sandoval hurls vitriol her way. Which brings me to my next point about why Ariana and Schwartz will never be friends again.

Schwartz Will Always Choose Sandoval

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Whether or not you think Ariana is unfairly asking castmates to choose sides, it’s obvious where Schwartz’s loyalty lies. After all, Schwartz chose Sandoval over his own wife Katie Maloney. The one time Schwartz did push back, it was only because Sandoval’s actions affected their business.

Aside from that brief bump in their friendship, Schwartz is constantly defending and excusing Sandoval like it’s his job. Almost a year after asking fans to give Sandoval a hug, Schwartz acts like Sandoval’s PR mouthpiece on podcasts. Defending Sandoval is the one area where Schwartz shows consistency and commitment.

Also, for as much as Schwartz likes to present himself as the more reasonable one, he and Sandoval are very much alike. Which also begs the question, why would Ariana be friends with someone who reminds her so much of her ex?

Ariana Sees Through Schwartz’s Act

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Even before Scandoval, Ariana pushed back against Schwartz’s nice guy reputation. In Season 9, she expressed frustration that Schwartz never faces consequences for his actions. Of course, she said so partially to defend Sandoval. Surely, she regrets that part now, but her overall feelings appear unchanged.

Ariana is also closer than ever to Katie, naming Schwartz’s ex-wife her most supportive friend. Even if their sandwich shop never opens, it’s clear Ariana values and wants to maintain her bond with the ex-Bubba. She also had a front row seat to the horrid way Schwartz treated Katie, both during and after their marriage. It would be shocking, and hypocritical, if she pushed that aside to befriend Schwartz.

Does Schwartz Even Want To Be Ariana’s Friend?

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As we know from his birth chart reading, Schwartz wants everyone to like him. Does he actually want to build a friendship with Ariana? Or does he just want her to call him “Schwartzy” and gush over how cute he is? Judging from his words and actions, Schwartz doesn’t even seem to like Ariana. He’s known her for over a decade, and still mispronounces her name!

All his talk about a five year plan to be her BFF feels more like a way to boost his reputation. It’s a win-win for him. If he wins Ariana over, he gets the support of her huge fanbase. If she gives him the cold shoulder, he gets to act like the poor innocent nice guy who just wants everyone to get along.

While the VPR cast has many friendships that don’t make sense, there’s no foundation for a genuine relationship here. There’s no trust, or respect, or enjoyment of each other’s company. To paraphrase Sutton Stracke, it’s time to let the mouse Ariana and Schwartz’s chances of rekindling a friendship go.